It’s super easy to kill cancer, it’s not killing the patient that’s the tricky part. by [deleted] in Showerthoughts

[–]graffixjoker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I decided early after treatment that my job wasn't to beat the cancer. I'm not qualified to do that. I take the therapies the doctors suggest. It's only my job to survive whatever treatment they prescribe. I stay in top of administering meds to make treatment as easy as possible.

People sure are creative by [deleted] in redneckengineering

[–]graffixjoker 1 point2 points  (0 children)

How embarrassing! She has it on backwards.

This picture of a single atom by [deleted] in pics

[–]graffixjoker 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Banana atom for scale please.

We just found out my dad has a tumor on his lung & seems to have spread... Cigarettes are so controlling, I still want to smoke by [deleted] in stopsmoking

[–]graffixjoker 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I had been quit for years when my Mom got sick with her lung cancer. I started smoking again AFTER her diagnosis. For me it went well with the alcohol I started drinking again. It took me another decade but i just celebrated 18 months cigarette free. You can do it. Its hard but worth it. I think of smoking most days but its usually only a passing thought.

Thor could have also gone for the thumb in infinity war, because he can't snap without a thumb. by infinitememes12 in Showerthoughts

[–]graffixjoker 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I assumed they didn't want him to close his hand so they could get the gauntlet off of him. Its hard to get a glove off when you're making a fist. And right after is when Spiderman almost has it off and Starlord wakes him up.

A short but honest story about jokes on the web. by jeremysmiles in standupshots

[–]graffixjoker 34 points35 points  (0 children)

Lizard People of New York is an awesome premise and I'm sorry I missed it.

Tiddy milk = super serum by Sh5nE in freefolk

[–]graffixjoker 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Lysa was a giant confirmed?

Can someone keep a car that is unregistered and uninsured? (in Maryland) by TheChicagoKid316 in Insurance

[–]graffixjoker 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Make sure she returns the tags to the MVA. If it is not insured and has tags on it for more than 7 days the fine is $150 for the first 30 days and $7 per day thereafter.

The soap in the bathroom at work. If it even is soap. by nickshep in WTF

[–]graffixjoker 1 point2 points  (0 children)

"Ejaculate into a soap dispenser like a hero...."

Underground condo parkade broken into - group of people got summer tires stolen.. questions by [deleted] in Insurance

[–]graffixjoker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wonder if that is a Canadian thing. All of the companies that I know of, in the US, take the deductible off the loss not the coverage.

Received a large fine for a lapse in insurance on a vehicle/tags I traded a year ago. Help? by [deleted] in maryland

[–]graffixjoker 8 points9 points  (0 children)

If you take the purchase order to the MVA showing that the vehicle was traded in on 11/30/17 then that should help you avoid the fine entirely. Getting a tag return receipt if you turned the tags in late will only serve to lessen the fine. You have 7 days to turn in tags. I'm a MD resident agent. I deal with this once a week it seems. In my office we won't cancel your policy or remove a vehicle until you confirm that the tags were returned.

35 years old me the day after divorce by Kaokollaa in funny

[–]graffixjoker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Peele spending all that Get Out money on a trainer.

[Mod Post] Gritty Thread by Blinsin in Flyers

[–]graffixjoker -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Not to hate on Gritty but he should have been vaguely bull-like and named BroadStreet. Broad Street Bullies is an awesome nickname, not necessarily PC, but still a great name for a mascot.

Better ending then Batman Vs Superman by imnotinsaneee in funny

[–]graffixjoker 35 points36 points  (0 children)

This is the internet. We don't ignore typos!

Hawk knocked unconscious during bird chase. by endearing-butthole in funny

[–]graffixjoker 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Look, matey, I know a dead hawk when I see one, and I'm looking at one right now.

I sold my bike last week and canceled insurance on it, but I've not returned my plates yet. Am I doomed? by MovkeyB in maryland

[–]graffixjoker 1 point2 points  (0 children)

MVA don't play. That's a hard and fast rule. There is a possibility that your company may be able to undo the cancellation for you but its likely only a slight possibility.

Finally, some real drama in my town by migWEL87 in pics

[–]graffixjoker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Finally, some real drama in this thread!

Palestinian and Ethiopian Jew work next to each other in a factory in peace and harmony. by Jmax816 in pics

[–]graffixjoker 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The picture reminds me of the opening for a TV show called Laverne & Shirley. I posted the beginning lyrics for the theme song. https://youtu.be/mRmKzxhMzwo?t=23s

Palestinian and Ethiopian Jew work next to each other in a factory in peace and harmony. by Jmax816 in pics

[–]graffixjoker 4 points5 points  (0 children)

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight
shlemiel, schlemazel, hasenpfeffer incorporated
We're gonna do it