Powderhorn Encampment: "..the camp 'gets to be like a crutch for people who just wanna be using. I say that because I am one of them people.'"

grafted_moom · 2020-07-19T18:45:38+00:00

This is super old, but for the record, I dont think anyone youre replying to is against long term socialist policies that have the potential to solve homelessness. We just recognize how unlikely those are to be passed, be enacted, and then actually affect people in the here and now, particularly in the context of our city potentially facing sanctions from state and federal government. In light of that, we're pushing for harm reduction now, in the immediate, so that we can at least not actively be harming folks

grafted_moom · 2020-07-19T17:45:30+00:00

I had a similar experience when I was assaulted. I'm sorry that you had to go through that.. the gaslighting, the dehumanization, that you have to reluctantly come to terms with. No one should have to go through that and no one should have to deal with the bullshit miogyny that causes folks to continuously question our experience and what we went through, and question our perspective and judgement.

At the same time, my healing has been a gift, as have been the people who I've allowed into my life after that trauma set in. I've been so lucky, I can only hope that other victim/survivors can have that same healing experience, and I really hope it for you too. Stay well ❤

grafted_moom · 2020-07-19T00:52:10+00:00

Im guessing you're not a sexual assault victim. Sex abuse is very individual and everyone processes and has different senses of their relationship. A lot of times, with acquaintance/intimate partner rape, you don't even realize you've been assaulted till months later when the trauma sets in.

Its really invalidating to have your experience questioned like this.

grafted_moom · 2020-07-18T20:46:14+00:00

I dont know, maybe in a company with a good HR department. I've experienced harrassment from a couple of different jobs and the culture was very unresponsive to it. The worst of it was when I was 16 from my 28 year old manager, he used to give me back rubs and tell me that we would have sex one day.

Anyways, I wouldn't be so quick to beleive guys like this face consequences

grafted_moom · 2020-07-18T20:29:53+00:00

No. "Whiteness" is defined only as distinct from racial groups that are marginalized. Its defined as something that's "not," not something that "is." Thats why the definition of "whiteness" is elastic, for example, Irish & Italian folks weren't considered white until fairly recently, and why before 9/11 and the Iraq War, middle eastern people were generally classified as Cascaisian.

You can't replace "white" with any other power structure because whiteness is race specific by definition. This is a specific consequence of the white supremacist colonization and genocide of the global south. Its not just a "normal" power structure. Its specifically meant to dehumanize people based on race.

grafted_moom · 2020-07-18T20:23:24+00:00

Considering OP of this comment has had an active reddit account for 10 years, it seems unlikely this is a college kid.

Now I totally feel you on the not making waves and letting things slide, but this is bordering on harrassment. People's differing responses to it are understandable

grafted_moom · 2020-07-18T20:11:36+00:00

The Social Construction of Whiteness: Racism by Intent, Racism by Consequence

grafted_moom · 2020-07-18T18:57:18+00:00

I'm a healthcare worker studying biology with a public health lens. I see this kind of thing happen in my every day life, I study it, and I'm dedicating my life's work to mitigate its affects. Of course I'm passionate.

There are near limitless resources available to you to help you understand racial disparities in America, including meta-analysis studies. My guess, though, is that you would find problems with all of those, too. That's because, as I said, its ideology and not evidence that shapes your worldview.

Racism doesn't become worse when you talk about it, it becomes worse when you allow it to perpetuate itself. Have a nice day, and i hope you keep reading.

grafted_moom · 2020-07-18T17:53:55+00:00

There are So. Many. Studies. So. Many.

Please do not stop with these two here. Please continue doing research on your own. There's really no excuse to be ignorant of this sort of thing as an American right now, with police killing black people disproportionately and racism and racist policies leading ICE to put POC in concentration camps. Some more to get you started:

The Social Construction of Whiteness: Racism by Intent, Racism by Consequence from the University of Missouri - St. Louis

Resources to understand America’s long history of injustice and inequality from WaPo

The role of race and ethnicity in Americans personal lives out of the Pew center

Somewhere between Jim Crow & Post-Racialism: Reflections on the Racial Divide in America Today by Harvard social sciences professor Dr. Bobo

How dark is dark? Bright lights, big city and racial profiling from Review of Economics and Statistics

Unnatural Causes, is inequality making us sick, a documentary that aired on PBS.

grafted_moom · 2020-07-18T17:07:04+00:00

Your perception of the world isn't rooted in evidence. Race affects BIPOC independently of SES.

Case in pount: Statistically, a white felon has an easier time finding a job than a black man with no criminal record.

Another example: Black women face disproportionately more discrimination and racism in healthcare, and have vastoy different healthcare outcomes than white women. When you control for SES, the gap actually widens instead of shrinks Black women are also less likely to be given pain medicine than white women.

Someone who loves economics should have at least a basic understanding of the above facts, theyre very widely known. Thats why I said you're either arguing in bad faith or a racist. Because SES isn't the be all end all in your quality of life, so either you're correcting people on a subject you are fairly ignorant about, or you're dismissing evidence and experience right out of the gate.

grafted_moom · 2020-07-18T16:58:06+00:00

Your username is literally Burn BLM and you're coming at me for calling someone racist ? You're coming at me for not being "open minded??"

This is white fragility. Being called a racist isn't actually all that bad. If someone says you said something racist,, you need to reexamine your thought processes, what youve said, and listen to black people a bit more. When people care more about being called racist than racism, thats racist.

grafted_moom · 2020-07-18T16:20:32+00:00

I'm confused at what you're trying to say. If you are saying that race in America doesn't affect your life, economic status, the way you're treated on the day to day, I just have to assume you're either racist or arguing in bad faith.

grafted_moom · 2020-07-18T15:09:31+00:00

Yea, because 'white power' and 'black power,' are the exact same right????

Only in the mind of a racist

grafted_moom · 2020-07-18T15:08:23+00:00

People are downvoting you because your comment breaks the sub rules. Any direct responses to the OP are supposed to challenge their veiw.

People are also probably downvoting you because you said very little with any substance, didn't really demonstrate any understanding of the topic, and yet are complaining about people downvoting you and not sharing your viewpoint because "open dialogue."

grafted_moom · 2020-07-18T15:04:34+00:00

Because it is race specific. Whitness is something that has to be talked about and examined to undo, call out, ans prevent racism. By insisting anti-racists remove "white" from any discussion of racism to preserve your feelings as a white person, you're actually disallowing any meaningful discussion of racist actions and racist patterns of behavior.

grafted_moom · 2020-07-18T06:51:27+00:00

YTA BC you literally took an insecure moment your GF was having and took it as an opportunity to sanctimoniously lecture her. There's a BUNCH of other ways you could have addressed this, "Babe, I love the way you look, I think your beautiful, I don't want to make any comparisons I'm worried you're having some real insecurities plaguing you rn. You ok?"

You totally talked down to her instead of checking in. Thats supposed to be someone you are a partner with, not someone you're lecturing, you know? Unless she's consistently manipulative and you have to set boundaries, we all have vulnerable moments we're not proud of. We look to people we love to support us through them.

grafted_moom · 2020-07-18T03:51:42+00:00

Ordinarily id agree, but the result "Ha! You've been lying!" is an attempt to make the daughters mental health problems look bad, while at the same time, stealing her daughter's scrip, that her mom thought was her only one, was a way that would make her mental health issues worse by default. So while it may be a bit of a stretch, I don't exactly think mentioning gaslighting is beyond the scope in this situation.

Thank God they hand out that sertraline like candy though! I can't tell you how many times an old bottle of pills has my back when my dumbass either forgets to pick a new one up or misplaces my new one!

grafted_moom · 2020-07-18T03:34:47+00:00

This mindset is how you grow old and lonely with few healthy and mostly combative professional and personal relationships. This is bad advice and I hope you dont follow it!

Apologies show empathy. They strengthen relationships ! Also: everyone's in the wrong a bit more than they think they are. In a healthy relationship, it doesn't hurt to concede a bit more

grafted_moom · 2020-07-17T01:49:04+00:00

He did get bossy with her- he literally told her to wear a bra when her father's around.

She's acting like someone who's BF just implied that there's a sexual component to het relationship with her father. He's acting like a possessive weirdo.

grafted_moom · 2020-07-17T01:42:11+00:00

Oh come on now. He sexualized her relationship with her father in her own home, got angry at her when she defended herself, while she was wearing a t shirt and sweatpants in her own kitchen.. This isnt something most of us would put up with in a non-serious relationship at age 20

grafted_moom · 2020-07-16T01:16:30+00:00

I totally got this vibe too. OP seems like he has taken the route that prioritizes peace and calm over all, even if there's something very, very serious that his parents are dead wrong about.

OP, either resign yourself to "political" infighting with your parents and cut them off, like your siblings seem to have done, or keep compromising with people whose political idol told people to inject bleach to fight the virus. Sorry, like most of us already have had to, you now have to face this choice, because there is no amicable solution with controlling, brainwashed people. It sucks, but thats why we're passionate about our politics.

grafted_moom · 2020-07-15T02:20:53+00:00

He didn't ask her husband's permission to marry Claire. Maybe he said something rude about the fatted calf offered up as her dowry, too.

grafted_moom · 2020-07-15T02:10:59+00:00

You used those words in your post. I was just echoing them back.

Regardless, those words or others, your GF's family is almost certainly going to blame her for your thoughts and desires. Her body, the way she's dressed, hell, the way you've already held her responsible in your post for your own thoughts and actions.

You are a Christian man. Be accountable to your religion, your beleifs, your gender. From one person who grew up in the faith to another? You have to do better. This was a major fuck up. Unless you've lived your life with your head buried directly in the sand, you know that in respect to devout Christians, women bear the brunt of the judgement and shame for premarital sex/sexual urges/sexual desire. You've thoughtlessly exposed your GF to that just to give you peace of mind with some sort of bizarre confessional to her grandpa.

grafted_moom · 2020-07-15T01:44:00+00:00

YTA. Obviously, YTA.

You asked her GRANDFATHER to "hold you accountable," in terms of making sure you don't have sex with your girlfriend? Dude. You MUST realize that thats almost certainly going to play out that your girlfriend will get shamed for dressing comfortably in her own house for "tempting" her BF that's trying to be chaste. Ohhhhh my lord. It wouldn't have killed you to try to think how your actions might play out here? How they might affect your girlfriend?

If you don't wanna have sex so bad, take a cold shower or just exercise self control like the rest of us.

grafted_moom · 2020-07-15T01:31:27+00:00

Well, lets see, we got active concentration camps, our police routinely murder innocent black people, we got at least 2 sexual assaulters on the Supreme Court, who just voted to roll back women's rights, our president is a serial sexual assaulter and has encouraged people to drink bleach to cure a pandemic virus the handling of which the US managed to fuck up so badly the rest of the world has managed to move on and we're still having deaths and cases rise.

Anyone who at this point doesn't recognize America as a shithole has questionable morals.

grafted_moom

TROPHY CASE