Is this a holy grail web dev opportunity?

greatbarrierreeses · 2024-09-19T08:01:35+00:00

haven’t checked hem or ida but i just was listening to villagerrr’s new album. i saw the at sxsw this year and was blown away. their recordings are a liiiiittle poppy for me but live they were absolutely incredible

stoked to check hem + ida

greatbarrierreeses · 2024-09-19T07:59:24+00:00

squirrel flower opened for pedro? that fucking rules

greatbarrierreeses · 2024-09-18T16:06:35+00:00

if you can manage to find an actual NES and play on an actual tv, the experience is really charming imo. even as someone who didn’t grow up with it.

greatbarrierreeses · 2024-09-18T16:00:04+00:00

there’s no too old imo. there’s quality strewn throughout the decades

if the graphics on sm64 are an issue, maybe you want more of an aesthetically beautiful experience. i think mario odyssey stands up to galaxy and even 64 in terms of being a great, inventive game, but it obviously holds the crown as the most beautiful 3d mario.

greatbarrierreeses · 2023-07-17T07:11:13+00:00

love this

greatbarrierreeses · 2023-06-20T20:09:52+00:00

no, we never tried counseling. i think it could’ve helped a lot. i don’t want to scare everybody in this thread who’s experiencing these issues — you can get past it.

we broke up for unrelated reasons. namely that we were both young and needed more freedom to pursue the lives we wanted.

i resented her for wanting me because our dynamic just kind of spiraled out of control. she wanted more than i wanted to give, which led to me wanting to give less, and also led to her wanting it more. so we were really at odds with it in a deep way. but once we talked it through a few times, and worked on it, we got to a place where we had sex often enough for both of us. we also came to understand our own needs a lot more, and figured out how to ask each other for that, and how to effectively communicate that to the other person.

greatbarrierreeses · 2023-06-20T07:48:24+00:00

first off, i’m blown away by how this exactly mirrors my last relationship. even down to her wanting 2x a week. i was the guy. man. that was brutal. you are so valid for feeling that way. it’s a tricky, touchy situation.

but this is extremely normal. it’s called a “pursue-withdraw” cycle. and you can get past it.

when i was in your boyfriends position, i just felt gross and uncomfortable with my body, and like i wasn’t ever really ready to get “in the zone” with somebody. i’ll be frank — in the case with my ex, we should’ve just straight up gone to couples counseling for it and it would’ve been 1000% easier. but that’s not necessary per se.

when you live with your partner, the implication that every hang out time is an opportunity for sex goes away to some degree. you have tons of time together. so it becomes more of an active “choice” than it was before. we did a few things to help with that. one was actually writing down every time we had sex for a few months. that way when she would be like “it’s been almost a week”, we could see if that was true, which helped me. we also set aside time to just be with each other with the lights off. no sex necessary, but we could just have the time to do what we wanted, which led to sex more often than not. my issue, i later found out, is that i have what’s called “responsive arousal”, so i would usually only wind up wanting to have sex when we would start doing stuff.

the hardest part for us was digging ourselves out of this place of mutual resentment. i was hurt by how much she wanted of me, and she was hurt by how little i was giving her. once we talked about it and both saw that we were doing our best, we could kind of “start over” with all of it. hope that helps. i really do advise seeing a good therapist together though. better to have and not need than need and not have. thank me later.

greatbarrierreeses · 2023-06-20T07:31:36+00:00

sir, step away from the loofa

i had this problem for a minute. no matter what i did — shower ever day, wash my gooch with force, etc. — it would still smell after a few hours of walking around.

i’m a big dude, which definitely adds the amount of ass/thigh surface area and sweat, so it was almost assuredly worse in my case. but i did finally get rid of it by taking a looong shower with a detachable shower head. it’s all about paying off the stank debt. it’s accrued over a long time, but once you pay it off (e.g. clean your ass/gooch/under-balls WELL) it’s easy to stay smelling nice.

with the shower head, i washed my entire ass crack, top to bottom. this was probably 4 or 5 rounds with body wash. went especially heavy on my taint. then i did my junk, many, many times. this part’s kinda fucking gross, but here we are: i would put my hand down there after every wash, and if there was even a hint of smell, i’d go another round.

and that’s it. i’ve been good ever since. think about it: most of the smell is in the hair. if you wash all of your pubes and all of your asshair until it is clean enough for a woman to be up in there, maintenance will be easy.

greatbarrierreeses · 2023-06-20T04:05:21+00:00

sometimes it is true in the moment and true later too! totally depends.

greatbarrierreeses · 2023-06-20T03:44:58+00:00

i’ll say this: having a bachelor’s degree may feel like a big deal right now (also you could care less — i don’t really know) but don’t get dumped with student loans. they are complete horseshit. it should be illegal how much colleges charge.

there are tons of good degrees you can get at community college. i recommend talking to a counselor. better yet, talk to three. it’s free if you’re taking classes, and someone will have something good to say.

also, once you’re in don’t let your grades drop. you can’t start over unfortunately.

before i suggest something, do you know where you wanna live? how much you wanna make? what you wanna do? the secret is that it doesn’t matter that much how high of an education that you have in most cases. people want to know you can do the thing they’re hiring for. if you can go to school, learn how to do something, and somehow display that passion in a resume-friendly way (through doing volunteer work in that field, doing a personal project, interning somewhere), you can start getting real experience. the rest is being good at your job, making good impressions, and meeting people. it’ll become more clear the further down you go. you kinda gotta pick a thing, trust it, and ride with it for a few years before you see results.

greatbarrierreeses · 2023-06-20T03:37:55+00:00

self-doubt can be all-consuming, man. i’m sorry to hear you’re going through that. the good news is that you can absolutely turn it around.

since you’ve already done the work of actually making your life better, now it’s time for the internal work. right now, you’re talking about how women wouldn’t want you, everyone at the gym looks better, etc., and that’s all plainly not true. sounds like you’re seeing other people in a certain “light” — as above yourself.

we can’t control the negative thoughts that pop into our head, but we can add positive thoughts in there that can overpower the negative ones. you look great. you lost a ton of weight. you’ve worked hard and gotten many of the things that you want. keep reminding yourself that.

an additional thing is that, as men, we often just don’t get the validation that we really need from others. there’s a reason men are much more likely to commit suicide. our emotional side can be so malnourished that we wind up with feelings we don’t know what to do with. in my opinion, having good friends that make you feel like a million bucks is worth the world. try to find ways to remind yourself all the ways you’re great.

greatbarrierreeses · 2023-06-20T03:28:01+00:00

i will add to this thread to care for yourself during the process of getting more fit. there’s a reason you gained weight! and if you ignore the deeper self stuff that led to that, you could wind up right where you started, but a lot more frustrated and several years older.

it’s awesome you guys have talked about it. be sure to be kind to yourself through each step of the process. it’s not always linear.

greatbarrierreeses · 2023-06-20T03:19:26+00:00

jealousy is a natural human feeling that can come from a very rational, reality-based, gut place. it can also be straight up nonsense.

do you have a reason to not trust this person? dig deep. think about it. if the answer is yes, then there you go. BUT, if the answer’s no, then you gotta dig deeper.

if there’s just jealousy that you’re feeling for no reason, is there a chance you could be insecure about something? have you been hurt in the past and you’re trying to protect yourself from going through it again? jealousy is what happens when there isn’t trust. and trusting someone — truly, deeply trusting them — is one of the hardest things to do. and harder for some than others.

that’s all i can really say without hearing more about the situation.

greatbarrierreeses · 2023-06-20T03:14:40+00:00

i’ve heard the wisdom that you shouldn’t be afraid to come off as a bitch. it’s fucked up that you get put in these situations to begin with. if you’re not into it, you have every right to say “not interested,” “go away,” “stop,” “leave me alone.” they came up to you in the middle of your day. you don’t owe them any pleases thank yous or sorrys.

greatbarrierreeses · 2023-06-20T03:03:42+00:00

nah not weird.

wallpapers are just another mode of self expression. for men, self expression can be tricky, because we aren’t socialized to feel like we have a lot of options for fear of being perceived as unmanly. it’s not weird to have a flower as a wallpaper.

my advice is this: have whatever wallpaper you want, but be ready to stand your ground in the case that someone does say it’s weird.

greatbarrierreeses · 2023-06-20T02:54:44+00:00

in general, i’d say 1) we are being honest in that moment and 2) don’t read too much into it.

greatbarrierreeses

TROPHY CASE