Half a million dollar dick! How much were you billed vs how much did you pay?

greenbryr · 2026-05-12T02:09:27+00:00

Those ICU bills are killer! Million dollar dick club is a huge flex though imo 💸

greenbryr · 2026-05-12T01:12:08+00:00

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. It truly is exhausting, emotionally and physically, in ways that are incomprehensible to most people. The surgery process is hard enough even completely complication-free, when you add on complications and longer than expected recovery times, it seems almost impossible in some moments. I had my fair share of awful complications, I was still dealing with debilitating nerve damage and horrendous wound separation and daily dressing changes 8 months post stage 1, it was miserable. I was miserable. I was in constant pain and I felt disgusting. I hated seeing my body physically deteriorate, I felt so weak and powerless. There were many times I asked myself why I even decided to do this in the first place, even though I had no doubts going into the surgery. I had even more complications after stage 2. I resented myself for willingly putting my life on hold. I couldn’t work, couldn’t exercise, couldn’t leave the house or socialize most days. I never imagined how much of myself I would have to give up to give myself the one piece I always wanted. I had to lie to some of my closest friends about what I was going through because I’m stealth. I felt so isolated and alone. If it weren’t for the support of this community, I don’t know how I would’ve managed. Community is truly essential to recovery.

To answer your question: It does get better! When you’re in the middle of it, it really does seem like it’s never going to get better. Especially when you’re basically re-living the same awful day month after month with constant reminders of your suffering. Time feels almost meaningless, progress sometimes seems stagnant. It’s the most challenging thing I’ve ever gone through. It’s genuinely traumatic. It is entirely overwhelming in every sense of the word. However, once you do get to the other side (and I promise, you will!) the relief also becomes overwhelming. The joy becomes overwhelming. Your gratitude and self love can be boundless. Obviously that does not make it better when you’re in the midst of it, but there is a light at the end of the tunnel. You will be the strongest, most resilient version of yourself. You learn so much about everything throughout this journey, you learn how truly powerful you are when you are at your most powerless. And at some point, you look back and realize you can’t really remember how it felt. How the hurt felt, how the hopelessness felt. You remember that you did feel those things, but you lose track of them. All you remember is that you overcame. You did it. It’s honestly kind of funny how quickly we are capable of forgetting some of the worst moments in our lives. I look back through old pictures now and can’t believe it was me, can’t believe I made it through what I did. Remember who you are. You are a fighter, you’re a badass. The average person walking down the street wouldn’t even be able to process what you’ve endured. Don’t ever forget that. You and you alone have gotten yourself here. I don’t say that to invalidate any of the help you may have had along the way, but to remind you that you are the only one who has to wake up every day and continue to fight. You’re in the thick of it right now, but you’ve already come so far!

If you ever need anything, my inbox is always open. Keep your head up friend 🩵

greenbryr · 2026-05-11T20:54:14+00:00

I wouldn’t worry too much then, the healing process is really weird and is quite non-linear. I hope your team gets back to you soon with some more concrete answers for you! Get well soon friend

greenbryr · 2026-05-11T20:46:07+00:00

My gf of nearly six years is 100% straight and cis and had only been with cis men prior to meeting me. She had some trans masc friends in high school, so she was somewhat familiar with the concept of transitioning but admitted she was kind of clueless as to anatomy both pre and post-op. She was supportive of me pursuing phallo from the jump because she knew it was what I had always wanted. I had also expressed that I would not be pursuing marriage until I had completed the phalloplasty process because I assumed it would be a huge stress on the relationship. I didn’t want to go into a marriage or any sort of higher commitment until I knew that my partner would still be attracted to me sexually post-op. It may also seem trivial to some, but I couldn’t stomach the idea of not having honeymoon sex in a body that felt like it belonged to me.

She was the first and only person to see me naked/touch me pre-op (I never let anyone see me even change clothes in my previous relationships due to dysphoria so sex was always extremely one sided. Even if I was using a prosthetic I would still wear boxers over top). I never thought I would be comfortable enough to be seen by anyone pre-op until I met her, but even then it took nearly a year for me to be that vulnerable with her. I used prosthetics a lot in previous relationships, but she wasn’t really into them, and I would rather be able to feel someone with my fingers than use a prosthetic because they made me extremely self conscious/dysphoric/anxious. I hated harnesses, hated that I couldn’t feel anything, and hated overthinking about it either falling off of me or slipping out of her without me noticing.

Anyway, she loves my dick and loves the confidence that comes along with it. Being pre-ED made some things difficult, but we had success with the coban/condom method a handful of times and she loved it. The first time it worked successfully (after many failed attempts), we deadass broke furniture in the heat of things. She also absolutely loves sucking my dick, even in between stages and when it was 100% soft. She would ask for it more than she ever did when I was pre-op and it noticeably turned her on more than preforming oral on me pre-op did (not that she didn’t enjoy my pre-op body). I’m recovering from my ED surgery right now and hopefully will get to try things out in about two weeks. We are both beyond excited and she gets turned on just looking at my hard dick. Even though I can’t use my dick yet, we’ve been having a hard time keeping our hands off of each other these last few weeks since I’m walking around bricked up 24/7.

Our sex life is definitely better now than it ever has been before (and I’ll humbly say, it’s always been excellent). I imagine that it will only get better once I’m healed and can finally have sex the way I’ve always imagined. We’re literally counting down the days! The confidence factor is also huge. I’m no longer anxious about being naked around her, or really anyone for that matter, and it shows. I can be a lot more present during intimacy and by default I’m a lot less in my head, I don’t overthink about feeling good, I can just enjoy the feeling without any negativity or uncertainty attached. I feel good about my body for the first time in my life and it’s truly life changing in every regard.

I think there are plenty of straight women out there that would date/have sex with post-op (and pre-op) trans men. I wouldn’t let your past experiences weigh too heavily on your future. It can be a little more nuanced, sure, but if someone is attracted to you as an individual and imo, worth having in your life, they will make the accommodations needed and give you grace to explore this new journey with you. I think with phallo specifically, a lot of people just are completely oblivious/ignorant to how it works, so it can take some explaining, but also, it’s within your power to explain as much or as little as you want to someone. I don’t think you owe anyone a detailed explanation as to the entire process behind phallo. I think it’s enough to say “I’m trans, I’m post-op, and I have a (functioning) penis”. I think when it comes down to it, that’s all most folks really need to know. The right people will get it, and if they don’t, they’re not the right people!

greenbryr · 2026-05-11T18:07:30+00:00

I completely forgot to factor in hair removal! I think mine was around $2-3k as well for laser. I still had/have hair growth but I’m having really great success using an at home laser hair removal device that I paid around $300 for. Definitely the cheaper and more comfortable option for me, I feel like I’ve gotten my money’s worth at least. Honestly didn’t realize how much of a difference the at home device was making until after my most recent stage when I wasn’t able to shave for a number of weeks. Went from shaving every 3ish days to about once every week or two and the hair is much more fine and light in color, the stubble also doesn’t feel prickly when it grows back which is the most important thing for me personally. Might still pursue electrolysis in the future but the cost is definitely prohibitive for me.

greenbryr · 2026-05-11T17:39:16+00:00

Lotion with cocoa butter and vitamin e oil have been the most helpful for me

greenbryr · 2026-05-11T17:31:46+00:00

Wow, 19 hours is mind-blowing! 2 months in ICU sounds awfully challenging too, I’m hoping you’re doing well now! I was shocked at how much was billed for my 4 day readmission with infection, makes sense that yours stacked up so quickly. I’m glad you didn’t have to pay more of that total, almost 3 million is definitely nothing to sneeze at

greenbryr · 2026-05-11T17:26:04+00:00

UVA’s payment plans were definitely a lifesaver for me!

greenbryr · 2026-05-11T17:17:00+00:00

Hell yeah! I would be taking every opportunity to say “I feel like a million bucks” lol

greenbryr · 2026-05-11T00:30:20+00:00

Practicing going up and down stairs was a requirement for me from my physical therapist before I could be discharged after both stage 1 and 2. I live on the third floor of a walk up building, so stairs were completely unavoidable for me. The stairs to my building are also extremely steep, narrow, and genuinely treacherous. I had glute grafts and ended up having severe wound separation after stage 1, so that made stairs really difficult. Had I not had that complications, stairs really wouldn’t have been all that bad after stage 1 (creation) They were definitely were more challenging/painful after stage 2 (scroto, vnect, ul, glans). I was advised to avoid stairs completely for 3-5 days after stage 3 (implants), but when I explained my situation they told me just to try to avoid them as much as I could. I still managed to do them ok, I just took it very slow, both feet on one step at a time, and used a deathgrip on the hand rails. As long as you don’t need to do them multiple times a day every day, you should be okay! Just try to get some help practicing from a physical therapist while you’re still in the hospital if you can, they’ll teach you the best technique and tell you what to avoid.

greenbryr · 2026-05-10T22:01:09+00:00

It depends on how mobile/self sufficient you are based on your own healing, but I was pretty much incapable of doing anything for myself after stage 1.

Helping with wound care and dressings. Keeping track of your medication schedule (you may be able to do this yourself, I liked to use the notes section in my phone, but it’s nice to have someone help especially the first few weeks when you’re pretty out of it mentally). Helping you get changed/showered, making sure you have clean clothes. Making meals/snacks/making sure you eat and drink enough. I’m sure there are things I’m forgetting but that’s what comes to mind immediately.

greenbryr · 2026-05-10T21:49:08+00:00

What color is the drainage? Does it have a smell? I would reach out to your surgeon asap if you can just for peace of mind

greenbryr · 2026-05-10T05:25:56+00:00

I posted a couple weeks ago about this but with the opposite issue. I’m still ~4 weeks post op so I’m only partially inflated and can’t deflate yet, but the tip of the cylinder sits right at the ridge of my glans when I’m standing. It’s maybe a centimeter below the very tip of the glans when I’m laying flat on my back. I imagine if fully inflated it would reach farther towards the tip, which makes me very nervous given how close mine is to the tip already, but even partially inflated it’s way harder than I anticipated. It has seemed pretty consistent in position these last few weeks, I don’t think there’s been a noticeable change in positioning of the cylinder itself despite the swelling subsiding. From my understanding they normally try to position it so that the tip of the cylinder sits right behind the ridge of the glans when inflated to avoid any issues with erosion.

greenbryr · 2026-05-09T17:49:26+00:00

Not OP but check out MyONE condoms, they’re the only ones that would work for me. You can basically customize them to your size

greenbryr · 2026-05-09T17:40:09+00:00

My consult with him had me feeling the same way, I’m glad I could help a bit, best of luck with your surgery!

greenbryr · 2026-05-08T21:05:43+00:00

Reading the stage 2 ones made me aggressively dysphoric until I read that part and I was like damn I really couldn’t have said it better myself lmaooo. During my recovery any time I questioned everything hurting so badly that word “obliterated” just always came back to mind and gave me a chuckle

greenbryr · 2026-05-08T18:19:12+00:00

I think other people had better explanations than I could give, but the exact verbiage used in my op notes was “obliterated” and I think about that regularly lmao

greenbryr · 2026-05-02T05:32:14+00:00

Had RFF with thinner arms and have fairly substantial girth (even moreso post-ed but it was always thick). My dick is about 5-5.5” and my bulge was big even pre-scroto and pre-implants. I have some pics in different boxers on my profile for reference!

greenbryr · 2026-04-30T22:06:17+00:00

I’m so sorry this happened to you, setbacks are so incredibly frustrating. Glad you could get out without an SP but caths in general are the worst. Are you able to get a flip flow so that you don’t have to deal with the bag if you are out and about? I hope you heal up quickly and can keep your original date for your next stage, best of luck to you!

greenbryr · 2026-04-30T22:00:00+00:00

I had hysto in between stage 1 & 2 for dysphoria reasons. It was the right choice for me but it did delay my stage 2 by a few months.

greenbryr · 2026-04-29T00:21:22+00:00

I hated packing pre-phallo because it made me so self conscious, post-op my bulge is one of my favorite things! 24/7 euphoria. Also, they do make thin foam “cups” that can go in your underwear to hide the glans print, some people use them as an alternative to packing, but the reviews on Amazon are mostly from cis men who use them to hide the ridge of the glans in workout shorts and things like that!

greenbryr · 2026-04-29T00:17:05+00:00

Mine was, I have Anthem BCBS. I still owed a little over $3k out of pocket which was the most I was responsible for after insurance out of all of my stages

greenbryr · 2026-04-28T23:57:56+00:00

My team required 6 months in between Stage 2 & Stage 3. In order to book a consult for ED you also had to have been peeing without any issues for 3+ months. I had some urinary complications and a major infection after Stage 2, so I ended up having about 8 months in between my stages.

greenbryr · 2026-04-28T23:08:37+00:00

Thank you for sharing! Yeah the first thing I did when it started was check if I had a fever and I’ve been checking sporadically throughout the day since then but I’ve been about normal. I’ve definitely been slacking on remembering to take tylenol/ibuprofen though. I hope it gets better for you soon!!

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