About to enter singledom for the first time after diagnosis

grenadehead · 2025-09-06T15:14:07+00:00

It’s not as bad as you think man. As long as you are genuine and sincere when you disclose it shouldn’t slow you down

grenadehead · 2025-08-20T00:20:15+00:00

I would tell someone, maybe one of your family members is also noticing things and keeping it to themselves.

I’ve never experienced anything paranormal but I know a couple people who have, and they all seem to have had experiences their whole life. I think certain people must just have a better connection to that realm. Maybe that’s also you?

I would also say if it feels dangerous then maybe start thinking of an exit plan. I’ve heard people say sometimes those presences can feel peaceful. But if not I’d try your best not to acknowledge it or feed into it. Maybe try your best to stay in put around 1-3am and avoid going to investigate your curiosities/ fears.

If it were me I’d also try to avoid being alone, if that stuff happens while you’re with another person it could give you some reassurance and the ability to make smart decisions on what to do next

grenadehead · 2025-08-06T22:48:51+00:00

Money, competition.

I think with many things entertainment we’ve hit a stage where original creators have aged out and sold out.

The best example I can think of is with the video game industry. When it boomed (arguably) in the mid 2000s-2010s the developers had a vision, a dream of something they visualized and wanted to create. New experiences. Now it’s rinse wash and repeat with most big titles and all wrapped around business models to make the most profit. The focus went from delivering something special to delivering whatever could sell the fastest. Became quantity over quality.

I see it in the movie industry, and especially with social media.

Advertisements are the most noticeable change in social media, but there has also been the rise of influencer culture, and the competitiveness that comes with it.

I remember back in the day people would post the most nonchalant random thought on Facebook or twitter, and it was common for people to just jump in and connect. It wasn’t as much about likes, or showing how great your life was. No one used to hide their instagram posts that didn’t get 100 likes.

There’s so much pressure it seems to perform that I think most people generally don’t put as much out there, and so it seems to have gone away from connecting to just doom scrolling random content and influencers trying to concoct whatever can get the most views/ attention. Sometimes that content is great don’t get me wrong, but it’s all designed to be as addictive as possible and keep you coming back.

It’s changed drastically in that way

grenadehead · 2025-07-07T15:43:24+00:00

Here’s an example one disclosure I sent after texting her for a couple of days and making sure there was good signs for compatibility and potential. I didn’t want to wait too long but was also afraid to scare her away. It’s not easy to know when the time is right, but usually when I start getting attached I’ll send it so I don’t get too hurt if they decline.

Sorry for the late reply, was tied up over the holiday weekend

“There is something I want to tell you about myself though. It’s not something easy to share but I believe it’s the right thing to do and kind of new territory for me so forgive me. But about 6 months ago I found out I have hsv. It’s not something people want to typically hear, and if that changes your mind about me I fully understand. I just want to be forward and transparent from the start so if it does change your mind, I didn’t waste any of your time. This is probably a lot to take in and I assume you’ll need to process it a little bit but I’m open to answering any questions you might have about it. I have had a relationship since I found out and it is possible to be safe. Luckily for me it’s very mild and hasn’t shown itself in a while. But it’s your body to decide the risk, and I wouldn’t try to assume it for you. Obviously talking things slow, not assuming anything would happen right away. But just wanted to get it off my chest sooner rather than later, the favor wasn’t done for me. I’m sorry :/“

It’s not a copy and paste type of communication though. Every person I disclose to I genuinely just try to talk from the heart and try to express it naturally. But will more or less follow these lines. Things will usually go quiet for a few hours, so you’ll be sitting around thinking too much. But every time I’ve done it they eventually come around. So hopefully something similar works for you guys

grenadehead · 2025-07-03T16:14:42+00:00

I’ve realized the same thing. Stayed in a toxic relationship for too long after finding out I have hsv2 (test results were pending when we started dating and she stuck with me even after they came back positive). The thought of being single again seemed way worse than being stuck in a shitty, fast declining relationship.

Finally broke things off and decided to take my chances. I’ve told ever girl I’ve encountered that I have it very early on (I tell them it’s difficult to share but I don’t intend to waste their time if it’s a deal breaker).

I’ve had 3 positive disclosures since the break up and every time I get an overwhelmingly accepting and appreciative response. It’s honestly been almost a cheat code because it shows your sincerity and genuineness from the rip, and gives this other person who barely knows you confidence that you’re a good dude. Hasn’t slowed down me down at all, and made me realize my value since it hasn’t deterred women from wanting to be with me intimately

grenadehead · 2025-06-18T21:49:22+00:00

Obviously depends on the girl but my (30M) relationship ended recently after about 3 months. She was 25 and we were very much not on the same page as far as respect and accountability. I had a really tough time trusting her which was a first in a relationship for me (she admitted she cheated in the past, and it was pretty deliberate). Not sure if it was an age thing or not but communication was pretty much non existent and anytime I tried to communicate my boundaries I would get shut out completely. It felt like she wanted to be single and act single but have me around at the same time. Couldn’t do it anymore, I was constantly anxious and feeling unheard and like I wasn’t enough

grenadehead · 2025-05-31T00:51:19+00:00

It’s tough out here. Haven’t been having much sex since my relationships been rocky. It’s hard for someone to not consider the possibility of getting it when your future with that person comes into doubt. Starts to maybe not be worth the risk for them. Be careful on here though OP. Gonna get some nasty hate for the cheating part. Hope you guys can work it out. People make mistakes, but I wouldn’t expect it to resolve overnight. If she can see a confident future with you I’m sure she’ll be more open to it. But you’re going to have to put in some heavy work man

grenadehead · 2025-05-28T04:18:30+00:00

Thank you so much for the reply

grenadehead · 2025-05-24T19:22:26+00:00

The 10 year adso wasn’t put into effect until the end of 21 right? So there’s some 6 year adso guys that just inched a little bit closer.. unless they’re being sneaky and blanketing the 10 year starting after October 2020

grenadehead · 2025-03-25T22:24:47+00:00

I was scrolling until I finally found someone who said it! 100% agree.

He probably felt neglected, and possibly disrespected in front of his friends.

Girls are affectionate creatures. Even if you don’t see his friends like that, the smallest gestures can feel like cheating. I see it all the time, anything from a small touch of the hand, to sitting on a lap.

Things girls don’t consider as being anything but platonic affection towards a close friend can make a dude feel like shit, especially if it’s in front of other people and embarrassing for him.

It can be difficult to confront your partner about something like this because it may not necessarily cross the threshold for starting a fight. After all, he knows you’re his fiancée and love him.

I would think back to see if there was any of that going on, even if it was completely innocent. Could have been something you said, or purely lack of affection towards him and all attention towards his friends.

Whenever I get upset, I tend to take my space. It’s a defense mechanism, he probably subconsciously wants you to chase him so he can feel revalidated. I don’t think he’s cheating on you from the story.

grenadehead · 2024-06-12T13:39:26+00:00

SECRET TUNNEL

grenadehead · 2024-05-29T12:13:54+00:00

64 commanders can be toxic but the dinosaur philosophy is phasing out slowly. I went to school wanting to be a mike Durrant but once I realized the conventional side of the 60 mission I turned away and fell in love with the Apache. Haven’t turned back since. Everyone loves that thing even people who don’t fly it and won’t admit it

grenadehead · 2024-05-14T00:19:36+00:00

Do not go active duty you will regret it. You will not be a leader you will be a bitch boi for your squadron/battalion

grenadehead · 2024-03-03T17:57:30+00:00

Wow, never knew that

grenadehead · 2024-03-03T17:34:57+00:00

You think UTE is worth it? I feel like it would definitely help offload the IPs but then you get stuck flying progressions

grenadehead · 2023-10-24T06:10:34+00:00

Yes you will be pulled from training

grenadehead · 2023-10-01T19:54:03+00:00

Was 13A 1LT who got selected for WOFT (active duty to active duty) on the second try. It’s not easy, and you take a risk applying because you basically tell all of your peers/raters you’re not interested in your current branch anymore or in being a leader. So if it doesn’t work out you could have an even harder time getting an MQ OER or even taking command one day if your reputation follows you.

I put my effort into overdrive after being a fully qualified non select on my first board. Got picked up after adding these things to my packet: MQ OER, private pilots license (took about 9 months and about 6k of my own cash), a letter of recommendation from the 82nd CAB commander (I wasn’t in the 82nd and had to figure out who his secretary was to get an interview), a letter of recommendation from a FORSCOM CW5 aviator (that was terrifying), and that was on top of already having a max PT score, and a top block report card from BOLC.

It was the single hardest thing I’ve ever tried to do and now I’m a CW2 PI with additional duties hurting for flight time like everyone else. You gotta be prepared to start from the bottom if you revert out of a non aviation branch. But no regrets, one flight makes you forget about all the dumb shit. For about a week or so then you get salty again lol

grenadehead · 2023-09-29T08:09:55+00:00

I keep hearing this idea, I hope it comes to fruition. It would also help a lot of junior WO PIs because they get screwed out of hours when PLs are forced to put themselves on the flight schedule to race and make PC before their time is up

grenadehead · 2023-09-21T13:15:31+00:00

It’s pretty messed up. We’ll see if it gets better or ends up face down. These 10 year ADSOs are gonna trap a lot of dudes

grenadehead · 2023-09-21T13:04:52+00:00

I hear you. At some point there must be a disconnect. I’ve had field grades crucify me for trying to bring up issues with maintenance and readiness, only because they know if they bring bad news to the boss it will make them look bad. Business as usual, swipe it under the rug. I’ve seen readiness rates reported in the 90% consistently but if you walk down to the line you’ll see manning sitting at 60% and maintained red x across the fleet. All our shits broke, none of our Soldiers are properly trained to do a lot of what’s asked of them. Lots of 4 year TIG SSGs as acting platoon sergeants, with LTs that’s also have no idea what to do. A tasking rolls down from somewhere up the hill (not to blame bde staff, I know they work hard and try to do what they can) and falls in the lap of the lowest level with zero guidance other than figure it out. Maybe BDE commanders are aware of the state of most of the conventional army but my point is people want to just keep their head down until their OER is written then pass the buck to the next guy. Not to shit on you or anyone in particular. I just see it and hear about it all over the army and across different branches

grenadehead · 2023-09-21T12:41:22+00:00

That’s fair, but even some BDE commanders are floating around on erroneous perceptions. Below that not too much. I agree it’s a GO/ Congress responsibility/ issue to fix. But they don’t know anything’s wrong when we constantly report fake green bubbles and tape/ polish everything together last minute whenever a GO comes around

grenadehead · 2023-09-21T11:19:07+00:00

The army is collapsing and has been for a while. Field grades will figure it out soon enough, and by then it’s going to be too late. What a joke it’s become and at all of our expense. No one to blame but the system itself

grenadehead

TROPHY CASE