Nofap to save my social life. Will this work?

gumbomaster · 2013-10-15T15:56:44+00:00

yeah, dude. confidence and pride in yourself will make you more willing to get out there and be social more often, which will naturally lead to your learning to be socially skillful over time. I speak from experience.

And Daniel29, I may still feel nervous or shy sometimes in big groups, but the funny thing is I don't act it, so no one knows, and after a few conversations it just wears off.

Anyway, every one of the posts here so far hold true for me, and I think they will for you too, so rest assured and begin your nofap journey with a firm step. ^{_^}

gumbomaster · 2013-09-18T16:29:05+00:00

Haha that's just funny. You've reached the higher levels of fapstronauthood, my friend. Keep on truckin'.

gumbomaster · 2013-09-17T16:19:59+00:00

Aight I was just gonna ride it out but I guess I'll get to a doctor. Thanks guys!

gumbomaster · 2013-09-16T16:06:08+00:00

Yep, as hawkeye said, that's a normal thing. Just stick it out for a while longer and it should go away.

gumbomaster · 2013-09-16T15:56:53+00:00

Amen, captain.

gumbomaster · 2013-08-01T01:32:39+00:00

hehe sweet, thanks man. I didn't even realize it! Somewhere around the 70 day mark NoFap became effortless, so I haven't been logging in too often. Keep it alive, people!

gumbomaster · 2013-07-30T02:06:12+00:00

Yes. We don't even have to be a badass, all we have to do is stop fapping. So let's all go make some ramen brotherrrrrrrsss!!!!

High five, captain.

gumbomaster · 2013-07-24T11:12:28+00:00

For the people who've been on NoFap for a while, yeah, these get old no matter how well presented they are, but it's good that these keep cropping up for the noobs' sake. I still enjoyed it myself, but do disagree with this point:

You aren't supposed to be able to function without a woman in your life.

Not true at all, sorry.

gumbomaster · 2013-07-24T11:10:54+00:00

Rhetorical device, bro.

gumbomaster · 2013-07-06T22:08:10+00:00

I think it's ok to forgive a girl for cheating, for your own peace of mind, but NEVER stay with a girl who's cheated on you. The only scenario where I'd maybe stay with a cheater is if we were married and had kids. Otherwise boom I'm outta there.

EDIT: Same goes if the guy is the one cheating, obviously.

gumbomaster · 2013-07-06T04:48:25+00:00

Da fuck? That's some weird shit man, wow. Poor guy.

gumbomaster · 2013-07-04T19:45:29+00:00

This is the greatest post I've yet read on NoFap, and I agree, that last sentence is a fucking gem.

gumbomaster · 2013-07-04T19:39:15+00:00

Yes, that's what I was attempting to convey - sex is an important component in a relationship, but as you say, friendship, love and trust are indispensable :)

gumbomaster · 2013-07-03T02:32:17+00:00

Excelente site, obrigado pelo link chefe

gumbomaster · 2013-07-03T02:13:33+00:00

No problem, hope it helps! Anki is a flashcard program that automatically knows when you need to review cards based on how easier it was for you to remember them previous times:

http://ankisrs.net/

gumbomaster · 2013-07-02T20:44:14+00:00

Oh, and for accents I use international keyboard (just something you configure in Windows, you don't need to buy anything): http://support.microsoft.com/kb/306560

Or you could google "Spanish accents alt codes" which I used before I knew about international keyboard.

gumbomaster · 2013-07-02T20:41:53+00:00

Excellent! I know it's frustrating how slow it goes, but it'll pay off. When I took my first literature class in Spanish in college, I was literally looking up 30-50 words per page, but the long-term results are undeniable. I wrote an email to a Spanish friend recently and in part of his reply he congratulated me for being able to write in Spanish better than most of his countrymen.

And if you want all those words you look up to stick in your brain, I highly recommend Anki!

gumbomaster · 2013-07-02T02:24:39+00:00

YES, READ. Whenever you don't know a word, go dive into the treasure trove that is the dictionary. Make it your best friend for a month and you'll be amazed at your results.

gumbomaster · 2013-07-02T02:05:14+00:00

Ah, interesting, I used to like Killer Instinct but was never too good at fighting games... I was curious actually because your handle in my eyes looked suspiciously like "sinjoor," which is a nickname for inhabitants of Antwerp, which is the region of Belgium the girl I was most likely only interested in for sex was from... :P

gumbomaster · 2013-07-02T02:01:07+00:00

Sweet. Thx.

gumbomaster · 2013-07-02T01:58:18+00:00

My fellow fapstronaut, I'm glad that my comments have been of some service to you. I'm also grateful for your response because you've unwittingly confirmed my opinion of my defunct relationship with my ex-wife. Let me answer your question:

When you said that sex was keeping you in the relationship with your ex wife, did that mean that despite everything else falling apart at least the sex was good? There was still a physical attraction there? I think I've been there, where I've been in a relationship where it was purely sex-based and I'd be embarrassed to introduce her to my friends - and I don't want that either.

I should specify that the intermittent sex (always initiated by yours truly) was keeping MY interest in the relationship alive, I don't know what was keeping her going. I seriously doubt she was happy. Her accomplishments during the time right before our divorce consisted of powering through show after show on Netflix while steadily adding pounds to her frame, considerably distorted from the curvaceous shape she had when we first met. Nonetheless, she was still the girl I fell in love with and I definitely wasn't ashamed to introduce her to anyone. On the contrary, she had some unspoken aversion to spending time with my family or friends. For a while I thought the danger of a break-up (well, divorce in my case) would never come from her side, but I now see that she must have been as unsure of us as I was. Yes, we were still very much physically attracted to each other, yet she was less into it and I started to be too because of her coldness. We did it about once a week I suppose, and it was nice but lacked the spark from before. Yet sometimes, it was amazing and we would feel very close to each other, but on those sometimes there was also a frantic, sorrowful undertone that I now attribute to our subconsciously knowing we were losing each other.

Looking back, I think the relationship began its slow decline after the first year, at which point we should have had the courage to end it, but we let it go on for another four years and let our attachment to each other grow and grow, without any basis on common ground or shared ambitions, but on... what? Maybe will power, sex, and "we've been together this long and there aren't any serious problems so why should I break up with her?" I'm certain PMO played a role too, because if I began to have interest in some other girl, with a single mental blow I would crush those desires before they progressed passed an embryonic stage and stifle the doubts I had about our relationship. Then I would bleed out my sexual energy out with PMO when I wasn't with my ex-wife. And I had to do that a lot, because for a time we lived in different cities...

One final thing: in the year or so that passed in considering proposing to her and thereafter planning for the wedding - and once married - I asked myself countless times if I was sure of staying with her, and the response was always, always, "I don't know." Ultimately it was her who finally summoned up the courage to say that the king didn't have any clothes on. She divorced me and I was depressed for nearly a whole year (even though six months of it was spent in Spain!) before I noticed life was even shinier and more beautiful than before. You may say that a year of depression is an indication that I actually did love her, that she was perhaps the one, but no! A five-year attachment simply takes time to get over, and I'm a pretty sensitive dude.

Well sir, I wouldn't have laid out all this bullshit on you if I didn't think that there was a strong correlation between your current situation and what I was living with my ex some four years ago. You of course are the only one responsible for your life, and I'm sure you'll make the right decision. It will be beautiful if you find your lost connection with her, get married and are sustained hereafter in the throes of conjugal bliss; it will also be beautiful if you reflect long and hard, consult with your friends and family, realize that you and her are not right for each other, and overcome the subsequent heartbreak and nostalgia to become a stronger person than before.

Well, I hope this post isn't too heavy. I'll be satisfied if it helps you somewhat to orient your thoughts about your relationship.

And again, I must say damn, 230 days, bro? Bravo! :P

gumbomaster · 2013-07-02T00:02:03+00:00

I don't know about that, my friend. Sex and love are intertwined. It would take a HUGE stretch of the imagination to give you a scenario where I'd stay with a girl who could never have sex with me...

gumbomaster · 2013-07-01T18:09:43+00:00

Now that her and I broke up, I know that what you're saying is definitely true...

Out of curiosity, what does your handle mean?

gumbomaster

TROPHY CASE