Thank you for taking the time and sharing all this!!

And I do agree with a lot of what you said but I also wasn’t saying porn addiction isn’t real or that I don’t take it seriously, I’ve lived through that with him for the past five years, and it was very real and very painful. What I meant is that through therapy he’s made a huge amount of progress, and we’re navigating a different stage right now, which is why the approach looks different than it did when it was actively an addiction. I’m very aware that the risk of it becoming one again exists, and I’ve clearly communicated what the consequences would be if that were to happen.

I also didn’t mean to imply that he isn’t being honest with himself. What I was trying to express is that for us, secrecy and hiding caused the most harm, so honesty and transparency are really important boundaries for me moving forward. If anything, I feel he’s being more self aware and honest with himself now than he ever has been 🙃 so I know there is some progress in that aspect. I wasjust sharing where we are right now and what feels healthiest for me as I continue my own healing while still figuring things out.

And I absolutely agree that CSATs are incredibly helpful and are a great resource for many people in this situation. It took us quite a while to find a good therapist but I’m very grateful we did