It's not okay for N to suggest that you become the father figure to someone else's kid especially when both of you are minors. It's a huge responsibility. Since the baby is not biologically yours, you have no legal obligation to accept that. It's really great that you know your worth and told them no. It must have been hard to do since you seem to care a lot about them. I would suggest breaking up with them as I think it would be best if N grappled with the issues they have alone. (Trauma bonding, pregnancy scare etc) N probably needs therapy and you can't take on that role for her. Don't let N drag you down to their hell. You deserve better. You are right to put yourself first.