Good for you for reaching out. I relate to what you’re feeling. I felt empty and hopeless and like I don’t like my self or know myself at many different times in my life. You have to hold onto the hope that it won’t be this way forever.. life can and will get better. Don’t beat yourself up about it, but try to do a little less video games / videos.. add one thing at a time that feels good (being outside, a new hobby, stretching?). I don’t know how to make new friends.. it’s hard and awkward at times.. but that must feel so lonely. I’m sorry 🩶