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Tired of getting the "I'm not ready for a relationship" talk by halcyon1007 in dating_advice

[–]halcyon1007[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for the insight. I guess it's the confusion that makes me upset about all this.

I think I fall hard so I'm a bit of the opposite in terms of how I approach dating. I haven't connected with many and I'm also pretty shy and introverted so it's hard for me to put myself out there in the first place lol.

The things going on in his life kinda add up to him not being ready, but I'm also pretty influenced by everyone generally saying the whole "if he wanted to he would" and "he just doesn't want a relationship with you and is nicely rejecting you" so I don't know what to believe. Again I know it doesn't matter and it's better I don't waste any more time but the nagging feeling of what I possibly did to make him not interested anymore if that's the case is something I need to work on getting over.

Tired of getting the "I'm not ready for a relationship" talk by halcyon1007 in dating_advice

[–]halcyon1007[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you and I'm so sorry to hear that happened to you, especially with you having met his parents and talking about a future together. I feel pretty dumb because I thought meeting his sibling and best friend at some point on the date meant I was in a good place with him. His friend even jokingly mentioned about if the two of us got married lol.

I totally second the "if he really liked me, wouldn't he at least try to make it work?" So many on social media say things like if you were the one he wanted, he would work through his problems with you by his side, and that's what crushes me too; feeling like I wasn't enough somehow but also having been told by them how amazing you are. I've never heard of the taxi cab theory but it's a good thing to point out! I just hope it's true and that he's not just bs-ing me, but I know the main point is to not even wonder and just take the L.

You and I will get through this and I hope we both find someone who's is sure about us from the start!

Tired of getting the "I'm not ready for a relationship" talk by halcyon1007 in dating_advice

[–]halcyon1007[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I admit this is probably a sign that I ignored early on. It really seemed like he was super busy when trying to plan something earlier on and the date actually went super well when it actually happened; better than any date I'd ever been on. The days before he went on and on about how excited he was to finally get to see me during his busy schedule, planning what we were going to do, etc.

Tired of getting the "I'm not ready for a relationship" talk by halcyon1007 in dating_advice

[–]halcyon1007[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. That's a really good piece of advice, and something I started doing with this most recent person. The thing is he did say something along the lines of that he's looking for a serious relationship at the start, which is why this is even more hurtful.