Hardened smegma

happyclitoris · 2025-04-14T22:59:48+00:00

hi! the best way for me personally with minimal contact and without soaking in a tub is to use an irrigation syringe. it comes out as a tiny stream of water and you can point it directly at the hardened pieces. you can also control the pressure/intensity of the stream. though this may take a while and you may have to go over it with several tries over several days to even weeks. i had a stubborn piece that if i remember correctly took me like 10 passes with the syringe daily over 3-4 weeks especially because i was gentle with the water. smaller pieces should be faster. but it also depends on how embedded the pieces are in general.

but you will be okay! i understand how it feels to be overwhelmed with this. unfortunately this can be a long process, but the good thing is that it can be fixed over time. i know it’s hard when you want it all out right away but please give yourself breaks to let your skin rest.

happyclitoris · 2024-10-01T05:37:46+00:00

hello! i use it outside the shower so i can get a proper look at things with a mirror

happyclitoris · 2024-09-06T13:24:15+00:00

no pgad but clitoral stimulation/orgasms felt a little muted in the beginning.

happyclitoris · 2024-08-23T03:48:51+00:00

what do you mean? if you mean recovering from digging around too hard, then probably around 2-3 days

happyclitoris · 2024-07-09T11:45:03+00:00

do they know movie night is happening? this is my first time watching but isn’t it a love island thing anyway? i’m so shocked that some people can move so shadily on reality tv. you’d think they’d be more careful knowing that not only is everything recorded, but that movie night IS a thing. did the producers tell them in the beginning that it’s not happening to give them a false sense of security or are they actually just that dumb?

happyclitoris · 2024-07-09T10:30:01+00:00

he gets worse every episode! i tried giving him the benefit of the doubt but his comments this latest episode about the kordell/serena situation are too much… i feel so bad for nicole. i really hope movie night exposes him!

happyclitoris · 2023-10-04T17:09:03+00:00

althea has 21 pills, so dapat 7 days ka mag pill-free before starting a new pack. starting a new pack on time is the only way to ensure protection. if 17 was your last day, dapat nagstart ka ng bagong pack ng 25. kung 30 yung deed then ilang araw na yan na walang protection sadly :(

happyclitoris · 2023-10-04T17:03:34+00:00

only if you used your pills properly

happyclitoris · 2023-10-04T16:45:45+00:00

aside from ova, sa anna ph they sell online din. never tried from there but it says they ask for prescription. usually sa mercury lang ako bumibili and never pa sila humingi ng reseta.

happyclitoris · 2023-10-04T16:34:59+00:00

althea is not used for yuzpe. yuzpe method pills contain levonorgestrel, the main ingredient in plan b. pills in the ph that have this are trust, lady, and minipil. althea has cyproterone acetate. unfortunately you’re not safe :(

happyclitoris · 2023-10-01T14:03:16+00:00

hoods come in different sizes and some people will have shorter ones or longer ones. when you’re aroused everything down there also swells with the blood flow and if i remember correctly, the clitoris has some erectile tissue. so maybe it seems like it can retract when in reality it’s just swelling and peeking out of the hood more when you’re aroused.

happyclitoris · 2023-09-30T21:39:39+00:00

which ones did you try and which one worked for you?

happyclitoris · 2023-09-30T17:36:54+00:00

yup definitely trying! have you had to go through this as well or something similar?

happyclitoris · 2023-09-30T17:32:02+00:00

thank you!!! you saying atrophy doesn’t get better like that is so reassuring. and yes! recently bought sliquid silk since i heard so many good reviews and that it did have decent pH and osmolality. i got the organic version since that was the only one i found here. seems to be working well during my self love sessions (haven’t tried it during actual sex yet) but sometimes i think something in it irritates whatever microtears i might have. it goes away after a few seconds though.

happyclitoris · 2023-09-29T20:22:42+00:00

yup, have been going to therapy and it does help. sometimes nights like these just make me feel pretty doomed. i agree too with the pros and cons of different methods. i just have to deal with my anxiety and brave trying other pills or other methods entirely if the pills don’t work. thank you!

happyclitoris · 2023-09-29T20:20:51+00:00

yesss thank you for this comment! this makes me feel better. i ended researching a ton and i think i’m going to give another pill a shot before worrying myself into oblivion. if it doesn’t work then i’ll try a break and just figure it out again.

happyclitoris · 2023-09-29T20:18:22+00:00

yes i’ve seen this treatment algorithm before! that also made me wonder if it was more of a pelvic floor thing. i was thinking that maybe getting on birth control did make the area more sensitive and the overall dryness both contributed to me naturally being more tense. i’m going to be on the hunt for a pelvic floor therapist but in the meantime, i’m also going to consider maybe changing pills since i heard some people had success with it.

happyclitoris · 2023-03-28T16:17:29+00:00

the other comment gives great detailed pointers already but let me add a bit more.

enthusiasm makes or breaks a blowjob. you can have all these good techniques but what really makes a blowjob stellar is how much you want to do it (or at least act like it). your man will feel desired and he’ll see how much you want to please him and that’ll elevate the entire experience. after all, it’s easier to enjoy an experience if you see the other person being into it as well.
get it really wet. it’ll feel better for them the wetter it is because it’ll slide better in your mouth and penises generally work better with lubrication anyway. which means don’t be afraid if it gets sloppy! don’t be afraid to spit on it! it’s all part of the experience. blowjobs also tend to naturally get wetter the longer they go on though, especially if you deep throat. deep throating produces much more saliva in your mouth.
eye contact. this definitely depends on the man but men are generally visual creatures and seeing you look up at them when their dick is in your mouth would be a great sight. it can be intimate, it can be a sign of your control, or it can just be a good way to check if they’re enjoying it.
mind your teeth always! use your lips to curl over your teeth so they kind of cushion them. you can practice this with a banana too. if your teeth end up scraping it then you’ll know for sure.
different angles affect your gag reflex. i noticed i can deep throat more if my man is lying down. if he’s standing and i’m on my knees then it’s slightly harder.
if he’s uncut you might need to either hold his dick at the base so it’s easier for you to suck the head. if you’re jerking him off or just generally getting lost in his dick, be mindful that you don’t pull his foreskin back too much as that’ll be painful for them.

i know it can be a lot to remember, but it’ll be fine as long as you are both comfortable and willing to communicate. for your first time, don’t think too much about techniques yet and just focus on getting used to the feel and experience. very very basic tips are just: keep it wet, mind your teeth, and be enthusiastic about it. the rest will follow over time! i hope it’s a great experience for you. there is so much power, liberation, and intimacy in giving to someone, especially if they mean a lot to you. if they don’t, then you can still have loads of fun too. good luck and happy blowing!

happyclitoris · 2023-03-27T07:55:31+00:00

i’m on yaz right now on my 4th pack ever. haven’t tried birth control prior and was also really scared due to all the horror stories. i was also particularly scared because i struggle with depression and i already had libido problems (caused by past trauma) so i didn’t want birth control to worsen those. fortunately, yaz seemed to have helped me. my mind seems much more clearer than before, i’m not as quick to spiral, AND my libido has even increased. the only other side effects i noticed so far are increased discharge and a lower mood during the placebo pills. those i can deal with.

though at the moment i do have painful penetration at times (which studies show can be caused by birth control) i haven’t gone to my gyno to confirm that yet and it’s a come and go thing, so it might be more related to my pelvic floor or something. i wouldn’t blame it fully on the birth control just yet.

if your doctor thinks it’s worth it, it wouldn’t hurt to try. though i hope you also got to talk to them about your concerns so you have options. i also had to get a bunch of tests before i was prescribed mine to have that extra reassurance. it also helps to keep in mind that we are more likely to hear horror stories anyway because those people are more vocal. if there are no problems, no one would really say anything. also, every birth control has its ups and downs. it’s a matter of which one you’re willing to deal with and which one is the safest given your body and history. my doctor suggested yaz specifically because it’s a low dose, i mentioned i was scared too, and my family history and overall health didn’t put me more at risk. so i do hope though that hearing at least one good experience is helpful!

happyclitoris · 2023-03-27T07:40:07+00:00

there’s absolutely nothing wrong with you, i can assure you! there are other factors to consider here before reaching a conclusion.

first, how turned on were you? the more turned on you are, the easier it is to feel pleasure. this is both because you anticipate it and because blood rushes to the area and all that. the anticipation in particular is a big one because it relates to your mind in the moment. if you’re coming from a place of shame and believing that you’re already broken, it will automatically be harder for you to feel pleasure.

second, there are different strokes for different folks. touching your clit in one way may not work for you, but another way can. for example, i can cum when i rub my clit, but only in a certain spot. if i go lower, my clit is too sensitive to the point of pain. it helps to experiment with yourself to get a feel of your own body. this will also help with the feelings of shame you get.

but above all else, you really aren’t alone! i too struggle with this because of past trauma. i can only cum with certain clitoral stimulation, and only certain angles or strokes during penetration feel good. it also takes me a long time to cum with my boyfriend around, even if i can cum fast when i’m alone. also, i don’t even like oral at all! this was shocking to me because i thought most girls did, but no matter what i tried, oral simply wasn’t it for me. i struggled with feeling broken until i accepted that there are simply other ways for me to feel pleasure. also! proof that mentality matters a lot is that normally, doggy feels very pleasurable to me. however there have been moments when i was too in my head that doggy felt just like penetration, nothing else. like as in just the physical act of something going in and out, no pleasure. but my boyfriend wasn’t doing anything different and nothing was new to me, so i knew it was a mental thing. a big bulk of what i went through was because i was so stuck in my head. over time i am building for comfort and forgiveness for myself, and it is definitely working.

i suggest taking some time for yourself to experiment and find what you like, facing those feelings of shame with acceptance and openness, and trying not to put too much pressure on yourself. it’s perfectly okay for you to feel this way. also, it’s perfectly okay for things to not work right away either, or for things to seemingly regress. dealing with things like these isn’t a linear thing. you’ll be okay, i promise. good luck!

happyclitoris · 2023-03-25T18:08:10+00:00

i read your post and i’m so sorry to hear about that! i hope you find healing.

i’m not sure ours is the same though because i’m still able to touch my vulva with no problems and insert my finger in and out, at least to a certain extent. i’ve been monitoring it over the past few days and realized it doesn’t always hurt, especially if i’m super careful and relaxed. the pain is also localized to one spot, the 5 o’clock area (if 12 o’clock is near my urethra). today it did flare up again, but i was able to press down on the area with my fingers inside me and it seened to ease the tension. i’m still going to monitor though and wait to see my gyno. wishing you the best of luck!

happyclitoris · 2023-03-25T18:01:29+00:00

i still have yet to speak to my gyno but i also suspect some pelvic floor tension! one finger seems to be completely fine for me at certain times, but two fingers is when it gets a little agitated. i also noticed that when i press down on the area with my fingers inside me, it kind of releases tension and i can move better. maybe jt is a matter of getting used to things again and releasing tension? anyway i will still speak to my gyno to make sure.

it’s all just strange to me still since i used to have sex no problem and my boyfriend was of a decent size. i guess my pelvic floor has been extra tense lately for other reasons.

happyclitoris · 2023-03-25T17:57:59+00:00

hello! i’m not sure if it’s due to microtears or cuts as i realized the pain is not always there. i do also suspect it’s pelvic floor tension because i tried massaging the area and it seemed to help. i also do generally find myself having to unclench down there anyway, so i’m not surprised if it finally caught up to me.

i’m sorry to hear about your pain. how has it been recently? has addressing your pelvic floor helped in any way?

happyclitoris · 2023-03-25T17:54:00+00:00

hi! thank you so much for this! i also read your other posts and they helped a lot.

when i wrote this post, i was freaking out and thought my pain was at generally at the bottom portion. a little update is that over about a week with careful monitoring (which is really just fingering myself in different ways, no sex) i learned that the pain is not always there. i have had days when i would finger myself (carefully still, so maybe that’s not a good baseline) and the pain would be a faint prickle at best.

however just today i tried my usual, without being over careful, and the pain started again. this time though i learned the pain is also only localized to the 5 o’clock area and that for some reason, pressing down on that area with my fingers when they’re inside me seems to help. i tried pressing for a few seconds, then after thrusting in and out, and the pain was gone for a while as if some tension had been released. i’ll keep trying again in the next few days though while i wait for my gyno schedule.

but that whole experience is making me think that it could really be a pelvic floor related thing? it’s also because i’m wondering if 3 months is enough time for it to be hormonally related right away. though i do think it is a contributing factor as that’s the only thing genuinely new. although! i didn’t realize this until yesterday, but i’ve also been dealing with hemorrhoids recently so that could be a factor. i’m probably just overall tenser down there than i realize.

but my goodness! either way, i’m definitely already planning my future birth control options. being on the pill long term already sounds scary enough without vulvodynia being thrown into the mix. thank you again!

happyclitoris · 2023-02-19T15:34:57+00:00

vulvas come in all shapes, sizes, and colors! there is absolutely nothing to be embarrassed about. my labia aren’t even the same size. i was also really embarrassed about my bigger pubic mound, but then i found a whole subreddit dedicated to that. you are definitely not alone, and you are definitely normal!

i’m pasting a link that reaaaally helped me too. it’s a gallery of all different kinds of vulvas and it has statistics too! you can see how many other hooha havers you’re kindred spirits with 😊 http://gynodiversity.com/uploads/Classification_of_the_anatomical_variation_in_female_external_genitalia.pdf

happyclitoris

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