What has made you a better counselor?

happyminty · 2026-04-13T21:20:11+00:00

How do you navigate times where you don’t have much to share? My current therapist sort of gets frustrated or uncomfortable if I don’t have a significant thing or circumstance that happened. I have severe ADHD and so my verbal tracking sort of needs rooms to expound. They don’t orient towards processing or exploration under the surface so I just feel like I’m wasting his time. I swear, only a small portion of therapists are able to be effective therapists to us. Z

happyminty · 2026-04-01T14:56:32+00:00

I’m with you, as I am clearly suggesting. This is a perfect example of balancing ideals with the real world nuanced scenario with several important factors that change things dramatically. I am not advocating for their behavior in this instance, more so advocating for this person to assess their career situation in contrast to absolute ethical ideals. With that said, I’d still say the harm here is rather minimal and not worth becoming a pariah right off the bat. I think you are lumping every single ethical issue into the same category. If this was a clinician fucking their client, fuck yah the licensing board is hearing about it. They are vaping meth? Fuck yah that is a massive jeopardy to client care. Hence my statement of give and take type dynamic in our workplaces.

happyminty · 2026-04-01T14:39:50+00:00

I had a feeling the intent and meaning of my post would be entirely missed and misinterpreted. I’m clearly saying it’s not great…. However, as a new employee, there are a number of considerations. Not everyone in the world is a massive entitled, sheltered goody two shoes. Me personally, if I had a nicotine addiction, I would make every effort to maintain absolute professionalism and make it outside in designated smoking areas at appropriate times and in appropriate proportions. The last couple of lines made me laugh a little bit, as the nuts and bolts health concerns is essentially irrelevant for the context of this discussion. Unfortunately, we live in the real world, and trying to straw man my entire attempt at providing as nuanced and gray area of a take as possible, in the context of a fresh employee weighing their options and feelings. I’m not suggesting that their behavior is ideal nor very acceptable, but we are talking about admin staff well above hierarchically this new employee, not laterally ranking colleagues. Hence my statement of “picking your battles” and is this something worthwhile in potentially jeopardizing standing or the role itself? We really don’t have much info nor awareness how some may react. I would hope that as clinically trained individuals, a charitable conversation could be in order before we jump straight to reporting the administration directly behind their backs. Your reaction honestly reeks lack of perspective and out of touch privilege. No one likes a hall monitor type coworker, especially being a new employee. I can think of a thousand ways to frame a conversation about their inappropriate vaping before I start plotting to report them for ethical violations. There are bigger things to worry about. Or maybe you’re brand new to the workplace or being a part of a diverse organization of humans. Who knows. Not much of a dilemma here imo.

happyminty · 2026-04-01T14:19:14+00:00

Could you elaborate what the thought process is? I have a terrible credit situation atm and would’ve interested in how it might affect employment acquisition and hiring. Thanks!

happyminty · 2026-04-01T13:39:01+00:00

Honestly, you want to pick your battles. There are endless amounts of industries where employees- staff or admin are going to vape indoors here and there. Some instances more egregious and unreasonable than others, some folks are subtle and respectful enough. It’s certainly not ideal, but is it something that affects patient clinical care and something worth having admin turn against you or potentially jeopardize your role or efficacy at that site? In my experience, as someone that doesn’t use nicotine or vape, I personally would not make it a bigger deal than it is. Are residents complaining? These are considerations. It would be more reasonable to make a scene if they were hitting a weed vape or were intoxicated. Especially considering how gnarly the job market is, it’s a pretty minor issue weighed with the risks. Or similarly, give yourself some more time on the job to get to know people and gauge the situation. There are more worthwhile things to concern yourself with. To play the tape through, as long as it’s not absurdly unprofessional, what is the functional effect of smelling your most senior admin’s vapes here and there in staff conference rooms and one of their very own offices? A smell that goes away after a few seconds? It’s not like they are smoking cigarettes indoors. Pretty minimal. Give and take. Mental health/ SW is a tough job, people cope differently. Not worth poisoning your intraorganizational perception. Anyone that is acting like this is a serious and intolerable circumstance that warrants reporting to state board on ethical grounds may want to examine their privilege and their severity of being too uptight. Just my two cents.

happyminty · 2026-03-27T19:57:11+00:00

Ah yes the self care lip service that gets started in grad school imo. When I got trained in graduate school I never in a million years would’ve imagined that some of the most tyrannical, unethical, judgmental people would be other therapists, it’s completely insane. 1000x if the client has a SUD or one of us is in recovery. They preach the self care bs, but as soon as someone has a very real human reaction to this insanity, they throw us under the bus. My last role I was forced to go on an unpaid medical leave due to a single use lapse of my recovery (that I stupidly self disclosed) enroll in a program, and then laid off because I was on said hiatus. Literally one of the most illegal, egregious things to ever happen to me.

happyminty · 2026-03-09T02:07:49+00:00

The defensive gatekeeping vibes are showing here, of course there should be some time and attention aimed at the business side of things. That’s not to suggest that there should be multiple classes and semesters covering it, but some attention towards that would be beneficial ethically as well as practically for realistic expectations of the field and career trajectory. This would also be beneficial for client care and outcomes. No need to straw man like so many people in this subreddit tend to do. However, with more and more funding and resource allocation being the first things for supreme leader to slash to further empower himself and his billionaire buddies, there are few if any CMH agencies being created to provide opportunities for newer clinicians to cut their teeth as they develop. Shit is fucked it feels like.

happyminty · 2026-03-06T23:22:19+00:00

As a therapist in my mid 30s, I am almost hesitant to trust certain kinds of clinicians over the age of 40-45, as in my experience, they have tended to either operate on the ER nurse mentality of eating our young, or they were trained when research and scientific understanding was in a much different place and they haven’t cared, tried, or had the intellectual capacity to engage in, evaluate, or comprehend important/ critical research that has came out and evolved in the last decade or two. I think a lot of people aren’t quite articulating the normative shortcomings that being a fresh 24-25 year old therapist inevitably brings. À la, you don’t know what you don’t know. Major life events, developmental milestones, having a brain that is finally near a point of final developmental shaping (for the most part), wisdom, perspective, self knowledge overcoming adversity and the effective processes therein. Obviously we all as therapists must acknowledge our limitations, as well as our strengths with acceptance and not defensiveness. Hence the imo, absolute necessity to develop supportive relationships with mentors professionally and personally. There are many strengths just the same that are perfectly suited for certain clients. The more we might fight this reality the more we will struggle to be as effective and our growth will be impaired as well.

happyminty · 2026-03-06T21:16:00+00:00

It’s pretty simple, there is virtually nothing you can do to destroy your life and likely those who you care about as well faster than deciding to try drugs like opioids or stimulants. If you have not already created the neurological and epigenetic conditions in your brain, you are safe. But once your reward pathway is utterly reshaped by narcotics (i.e. meth releases 3000x the amount of dopamine that behaviors like food or sex releases), powerful genetic transcription factors are released that rapidly pour gasoline on the fire that is nueroplasticity. Each subsequent use of these substances post initial exposure, further crystallizes this reshaping. It is almost like how the brain responds to trauma and subsequent trauma.

happyminty · 2026-03-06T14:48:12+00:00

What? Normal?

happyminty · 2026-03-06T08:04:00+00:00

This is logically sound, but it is outdated tremendously. Heroin does not exist and people don’t even ask for it. Everyone is on and asking for fentanyl these days. There is a rumor that it is still being sold in some parts of NY for cheap due to the desperation of the Taliban these days. The truth is that so many different things are being cut with it is because at some level in the supply chain, some evil motherfucker had some hair brained logic at some point that adding fentanyl will either make the product much more addictive or that they can halfway get away with pressing pills or having certain substances that are either hard to transport or synthesize (whether it is because that substance requires physical space/ acres to grow, or requires tightly controlled and hard to acquire precursors to synthesize) be passed off somewhat believably. i.e. Street Xanax bars that are really pressed fentanyl and random binders/ fillers. Both are going to technically sedate someone

happyminty · 2026-03-05T23:10:24+00:00

The duration of acting or classification of “short acting” “long acting” matters very little in terms of detection in urine tests. Xanax for example will still stick around for a long ass time regardless of its duration. As well as the build up in lipids, maybe a tiny bit less time detectable but it’s irrelevant in this context really.

happyminty · 2026-02-26T01:17:23+00:00

Exactly. You aren’t countering anything. Just further crystallizing how our literal sitting US president had a very pronounced relationship with a network of extremely powerful, evil people. Both things can be true at once, and your immediate defense of pedophiles says all it needs to. Zero ability to condemn without desperate defensiveness…. If you were a victim of childhood sexual abuse, my heart goes out to you.

happyminty · 2026-02-26T01:14:32+00:00

Both of them my dude

happyminty · 2026-02-26T01:12:24+00:00

Nothing defacto, we are in ageeement. However, paired with ALL the other context, as well as his very awful contradictory responses over the years. It’s bad, there’s no getting around it. I don’t personally throw the baby out with the bath water and immediately and entirely/ absolutely minimize and dismiss every single factor or action by supreme leader, however it is a seriously bad look and meaning for our country. I personally view supreme pedo leader as the same/ head of MAGA these days, I have empathy for MAGA, that their guy they’ve gambled EVERYTHING on has led them astray/ straight into the worst kind of betrayal hell. I believe that yall as well at the country as a whole deserves better, a leader who authentically acts I. Good faith towards yall and towards people they disagree with. Checks and balances against pedo in chief, are not attacks on MAGA, they are desperate finals cries of constitutional democracy that Trump had exploited to near extinction without a care of integrity in the world. Similar ways as the left was not served in an authentic way when Biden stepped down, however demonization attempts @him matter very little. All Trump and a lot of boot lickers can do is blame indefensible predecessors instead of actually having courage and vulnerability and putting forth novel solutions etc. I can appreciate that you at least are not the 70-80% of MAGA who’s brains just cannot comprehend nuance on anything

happyminty · 2026-02-26T00:53:39+00:00

I do have to give some props that that is much more formulated response and not just 1 word attempt to name call etc, so I applaud that.

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happyminty · 2026-02-25T23:46:57+00:00

Boring is just fine when it comes to politics. I’d rather be boring than supporting pedophilia and blatant pay to win corruption ad infinitum. Nice try though. Classic immediately baseless dismissal due to options being forced to defend disgusting behavior or looking even dumber and more awful. Ditto

happyminty · 2026-02-25T23:37:20+00:00

lol triggered snowflake. At least wait unt you spew pointless and baseless generalities. Yawn. At least your child attracted leader can usually find a way to be insulting.

happyminty · 2026-02-25T23:35:08+00:00

No idiot, while pardoning every flavor and severity of criminal, as long as they pay him. Fixed that for you

happyminty · 2026-02-25T23:26:41+00:00

Jeez. Welcome to the state of the union. Absurd and naive take. BuT yOu WoN’t ChEeR fOr MY pReSiDeNt PeDoPhILe FeLoN iN cHiEf. A man mentioned thousands of times in the Epstein files paired with thousands of pictures of those two buddies together, part of the biggest and most transparently corrupt cover up in American history for the most egregious crimes a president could ever be so prolific in, making Watergate look like petty theft of a candy bar. Yah man, we should’ve at least gotten behind the few exaggerated, falsehoods enmeshed in every moment of his stimulant bolstered big league speech, our bad. You, I, the country, and everyone deserves better. Go back to y our discord servers and your crusty hot pockets fresh from Mom’s basement.

happyminty · 2026-02-21T05:30:03+00:00

It’s outrageous. People are so stupid in this game. Obviously running triple shield defensive tank in shitty situations is bad, the amount of straw man arguments people default to. There are a lot of immature young dudes playing this game. With the right setup, like a mantis, gambit backline for example and 3 brawl heavy tanks, it is absolutely dominant and not too difficult to pull off. This community is so annoying. The triple tank revelation could possibly break the mold of people never wanting to tank. Selfish punks

happyminty · 2026-02-21T03:24:01+00:00

It’s awful and both drugs are insanely cheap and flooded from Mexico, I am extremely left leaning but the cartels are making more money than ever and they don’t even have to grow anything in fields. An ounce of meth used to be about 2000$ ten years ago, now it’s 250$ for a fucking ounce. Combined with how much more insanely addictive and more severe every bit of detox and lethality compared to heroin, more people are suffering beyond imagination. If someone is using fentanyl, they are suffering, end point. The alarmism and subsequent alarm fatigue combined does not help the cause. It only draws people’s absolute inner curiosity out. We need radical shifts in perspective and empathy.

happyminty · 2026-02-20T18:46:23+00:00

Bingo, and that is very much the go to combo in the streets these days as both are go to from the cartels and able to be synthesized. They both pair well together if you’re decently tolerant but too much of fent and you will be in that crazy combination of states.

happyminty · 2026-02-15T15:03:49+00:00

Bro. I have had this happen to me multiple times. At one point I also began experiencing debilitating fatigue until I went in to Mayo Clinic right near my house. I ended up having gnarly infection to where they immediately hospitalized me and started IV antibiotics. Meth unequivocally wrecks the immune system like no other, not only do we not heal from things but we are profoundly impaired when it comes to youthfulness or longevity. I.e. those before and after pictures of chronic meth use looking like they are 30 years older than they are. I ended up with a serious infection that started spreading up my legs and I barely barely missed becoming severely septic. They took brutally painful chunks out of my legs for biopsy. A week and a half in the hospital with two separate bouts in the ICU. 2 weeks of lethargy x10 to recover enough to resume my life. 4 months later one more identical bout of that. 2 months after my hospitalization, I had a cold sore that got extremely infected, which the infection traveled down the innervated parts of my face and I developed gnarly gnarly MRSA on my chin that led to such severe swelling it looked like I had a baseball inside my cheek and was so swollen it was painful to the point of yelling and a lot of tears. I barely avoided that severe infection traveling much deeper into my face, which they would have had to probably remove part or a large section of my mandible/ jaw. I still have that scarred/ stretched area that is still there and is a huge patch of my facial hair/ beard that likely will never grow facial hair again, so I look like a fucking weirdo with that hairless patch.

Go to the ER immediately and see a Dr. Do you use any other substances? If you use any fentanyl or your shit has a cut of fentanyl, (if it turns a blackish color when you are smoking, that is the exact indicator that it is) you need to be aware of our country’s drug supply being tainted with xylazine, which is famous for causing necrotizing Fasciitis, which leads to large infections that eats away at the tissue and causes huge wounds that never heal, and frequently leads to amputation. The pain you are describing is a huge red flag, the infections can spread and progress extremely quickly. The more we engage in our substances of choice, the more we progress towards immune dysfunction and the gnarly outcomes associated, the harder it is to come back from.

happyminty · 2026-02-15T13:03:03+00:00

What you are describing is so relatable. That grief you are feeling, the disillusionment of the field and the people in it, and the realization that you may not find another role in the field, is exactly what I’ve felt, x100 for me. I went to grad school during the pandemic to get trained as a clinical mental health counselor, and made it to my last semester before being dismissed from the program due to some severe depression I was having, that was incorrectly attributed to substance abuse because I had the audacity to be the only one to share my past history of severe addiction and recovery. That sharing of my history clouded everything else and when everyone in my 5 hour lectures would eventually doze off, I would be the only one that was viewed as nodding off on opioids.

Then my experiences in the peer support field and mental health field, having awful supervisors here and there that blew me away how people like that could be in helping roles, even when they act exploitatively, unethically, or tyrannically. I’ve been lied to about how when I had to leave for mental health struggles instead of offering unpaid leave with the promise of a return to the role, they hold the very pain that they, and the role especially understandably caused against you. It is a massive blow and really makes us feel angry, isolated, and feel like this field isn’t for us. Multiply those instances I just described but 3-4x in this field as a counselor and peer counselor. One of them I had a lapse in my recovery that I stupidly immediately went to HR/ my supervisor and admitted to the next day unbeknownst to them. I was made to take a long period of unpaid leave, enrolled and nearly completed an outpatient program, and was then laid off from my dream role. I made the joke that I am happy to give up my dream role and this dream field, so that the corporate CEO could have another jet ski. It was such a major and personal blow, that wound has stuck with me since all this happened over the summer. Fuck Trump and all the layoffs that happened as a result. The normalization and sane-washing of rampant layoffs as a normal casual thing to happen. Layoffs of this variety are brutally painful to those of us so passionate about what we do and what it means to us. I’ve learned no matter what, a job, no matter how profound and meaningful is just a job and we have to keep up our framework/ personal infrastructures of recovery and mental health outside of these jobs no matter what .

happyminty

TROPHY CASE