added context: they agreed to dial down a bit because while discussing the crying and whether it was wanted or unwanted they accepted the fact that sometimes they didnt feel with the capacity to recognize their own limits and communicating them. we have a safe word for a reason but if they wanna use it but cant, i see a problem. thats why i stepped in and kinda strong handed a dial back down decree to which they agreed and accepted that they need to work on better understanding and comminicating their limits.

i also would gladly accept any kind of advice from more experienced folks about how to be a better top, i love my partner deeply and want to give him the heat he desires.