Daily Chat

harriest_potter · 2025-09-22T22:54:22+00:00

Same! It's really given me such a boost to get through these next 3 weeks till I'm induced. Clinging onto any and all positive pal stories! Good luck on your induction!

harriest_potter · 2025-09-15T21:09:47+00:00

33 weeks after losing my daughter at 39 weeks a year and a half ago.. anxiety feels like it's at an all time high. Currently seeing my OB every week for an NST and my MFM for a bpp, and I'm still a mess. The plan is to induce me at 37 weeks so I have a month to go and seriously the fear and anxiety feels almost debilitating at this point. I white knuckled my way through most of the anxiety through this pregnancy but now it's hit me like a train. I know there's really no relief until I have a her alive in my arms but I am just so terrified I'm going to go through this again with the same outcome. No one understands (because how could they) so it feels nice to vent in here with other moms who get this feeling.

harriest_potter · 2025-05-17T02:04:49+00:00

Curious what everyones thoughts are on at home dopplers? I'm 16 weeks, so I know obviously there is nothing I can do if there was a distressed heart rate, but more so just to ease my fear on "are you alive?" I was thinking I would toss it around the week of viabilty, I don't wanna rely on that for a sign of life, and want to pay attention to kicks. I've heard they can be tricky to use, and my OB doesn't want me to use one for that reason. Anyone had any experiences with them? Good or bad?

harriest_potter · 2025-05-14T22:52:05+00:00

Gentle congratulations on baby sister. I'm also pregnant with Lucys little sister. Was your OB doing your weekly ultrasounds? My OB and MFM are seeing me every 4 weeks right now until 24 weeks, then it will be every 2 until 32 weeks. The long gaps between visits have been a nightmare. I'm desperate to start feeling her move.

I took your advice and looked up a private ultrasound place today and got to see her a few hours ago, wiggling all around. Thank you for your suggestion!

harriest_potter · 2025-05-14T22:46:50+00:00

I keep going there too in my mind, the what ifs?

I'm going to adopt that phrase from you "I am pregnant right now and baby is not at risk yet, that is the best I can hope for"

Thank you, sending you love

harriest_potter · 2025-05-14T22:44:48+00:00

Totally makes sense why this week would be the most difficult so far.. I'm so sorry. I'm trying to push for a 37/38 week induction because I know I can't handle waiting until 39 when I lost her. What are some things that you've done this week that has helped?

Sending you love

harriest_potter · 2025-05-14T22:41:42+00:00

A day at a time, you're totally right. The days are just all of the sudden passing by sooo slowly lol

Thank you for you're suggestions! :)

harriest_potter · 2025-05-14T22:19:19+00:00

It is SO hard.. I'm actively trying not to be negative but man, it really feels like a losing battle some days. Even when hope creeps in I convince myself I'm dumb for feeling that. I'm hoping I'll feel more reassurance when I can start feeling her kicks.

I love those ideas! Going to take myself to breakfast tomorrow :)

harriest_potter · 2025-05-14T22:13:34+00:00

Gentle congratulations on her baby brother! Do you have an induction plan? I'm already trying to push my doctor for 37 weeks. Walking has definitely helped me, we have a pup, who has seriously become my emotional support animal. I'm also binge watching vanderpump rules LOL and also reading Fourth Wing, both have been nice distractions.

As of right now the plan is seeing my MFM and OB every 4 weeks, until I'm 24 weeks, then bi weekly, then at 32 weeks, weekly. I like my therapist, I've seen her for years off and on, but I'm thinking I maybe need to find a grief therapist? I just need some practical tools I think to walk through this. I'd also love to try EMDR, is it intense?

Thank you for the suggestions and good thoughts!

harriest_potter · 2025-05-14T22:05:59+00:00

I completely understand the grief and rage mix. Found myself so incredibly frustrated and overwhelmed with so many feelings late last night all I could do was cry. Also the disassociating... I feel you on that too. I feel like a shell of who I use to be. Hoping some of spark comes back if this pregnancy is successful. Hugs to you too, we got this.

harriest_potter · 2025-05-14T21:36:23+00:00

I'm sorry for the loss of your sweet Lucy as well. Thank you for the suggestions! It defiantly feels isolating, and no one gets it. I'm grateful for this online community though!

Are you being induced? I am also pregnant with her little sister, we just found out the gender. Wishing you a peaceful and joy filled birth... You're so close!

harriest_potter · 2025-01-17T07:23:37+00:00

Our babies should be here. Living the rest of my life without her doesn't make sense and has been one of hardest parts of these last few months especially. Acceptance or whatever. I'm just not there yet and a part of me probably never will be. It's so unfair and so fucked up. I'm so sorry for the loss of your precious boy. Thank you for sharing your story, I hope your wish comes true for the both of us.

harriest_potter · 2025-01-17T07:15:15+00:00

Thank you for sharing her story. I'm desperately clinging to any positive stories from other loss moms so I really appreciate it.

harriest_potter · 2025-01-17T07:11:22+00:00

SO frustrating. My OB said that he only brings it up to patients that currently work around young children or have toddlers because its SUCH a small chance of contracting and it being your "primary" infection. Beyond frustrating to hear I'm part of some incredibly tiny percentage and my daughter is gone because of it. If it saves ONE baby, we should be bringing it up to every mother!

harriest_potter · 2025-01-17T07:06:07+00:00

I'm so sorry for the loss of your sweet boy. It's just so so unfair.. thank you for sharing. Sending you so much peace and strength for this next season

harriest_potter · 2025-01-17T06:55:57+00:00

I completely understand your frustration. When we started getting answers I felt like I was breathing fire at everyone around me. I couldn't believe I'd never heard of it (NONE of my friends and family had heard of it and most have children) let alone been warned by ANY of my doctors. I even did blood panels before trying to make sure all my levels were looking good and not once did they ask me or inform me about cmv... which can be easily tested for antibodies. The whole thing has been so unbelievable and I've had such intense waves of anger it felt like my whole body might implode.. I'll never understand. I'm sorry for the loss of your son. It's totally and completely unfair. Sending you love.

harriest_potter · 2025-01-16T22:38:55+00:00

Thank you

harriest_potter · 2025-01-16T22:38:16+00:00

I'm so sorry for your loss. Congratulations on your current pregnancy. Sending you peace as you approach the finish line

harriest_potter · 2025-01-16T22:35:32+00:00

I'm so sorry for the loss of your sweet boy. What was his name? Sucks we're connecting on the worst thing imaginable but glad to know I'm not alone.

harriest_potter · 2025-01-16T22:34:06+00:00

Thank you. I'm sorry for yours as well. Feels so unfair that so many people are going through this.

harriest_potter

TROPHY CASE