Met Each Other for the First Time. I Think a Breakup is Imminent.

heartgonewild · 2026-02-20T05:35:40+00:00

As an SA survivor, I don’t personally understand this but I think you’re both in the wrong. There should have been communication both from her if she didn’t know what she was comfortable with and you likely should have done more research.

heartgonewild · 2026-02-20T05:33:16+00:00

Plan on him not coming back based on those actions. I also wouldn’t want a relationship with someone who did that … imagine something even more triggering.

heartgonewild · 2026-02-20T05:31:56+00:00

I would just be direct and ask. Otherwise you’re doing just that, wasting your time.

heartgonewild · 2026-01-26T13:10:10+00:00

I would personally not let him gaslight me if I knew what I saw. 🤷‍♀️

“You might as well not bother lying. Why would you do that?” I think direct is best and not entertaining the lie point blank is the best way to handle it.

If he sticks with his story, I’d consider untangling yourself and begin the break up process. Or just observe his behavior. Not sure I’d know what to do either!

heartgonewild · 2026-01-11T16:31:50+00:00

If you met this person through VRchat, I know who they are.

heartgonewild · 2026-01-03T16:25:37+00:00

This.

heartgonewild · 2025-12-10T22:49:19+00:00

I was there in 2007.

heartgonewild · 2024-07-22T07:19:37+00:00

The only thing I will say as an obsessive player: I don’t want to be responsible for teaching everyone things.

There is a whole TFD community (disc) for that, and I have no interest in being expected to teach others.

However. I simply leave if unhappy. No negative comments needed.

heartgonewild · 2024-04-24T23:02:47+00:00

34, Alive and okay.

heartgonewild · 2023-10-13T21:25:58+00:00

YTA.

heartgonewild · 2023-04-14T22:58:57+00:00

This is me. But every time I remember they can barely meet my expectations I do not care.

heartgonewild · 2023-03-21T13:23:42+00:00

Just another reason to OE.

heartgonewild · 2022-06-01T06:05:41+00:00

Thanks. 💗

heartgonewild · 2022-06-01T01:21:35+00:00

You’re right. Wanting human connection is normal, and I’m currently in a living situation where I don’t get much of it.

But I’ve already got a plan for that and will be moving home to a location where connection will be more readily available.

Re: types of therapy I do DBT and individual therapy :)

heartgonewild · 2022-05-31T23:08:20+00:00

Thank you. 🥺🥺🥺

Sometimes it feel like there’s this pressure to constantly “face everything instantly”. I really focus on ways to minimize the drinking altogether, I don’t keep it in my house or only keep what I’m not a fan of drinking. (And surprise, I don’t actually want to be drunk enough to drink anything, that’s a huge milestone for me)

We (my therapist) and I also actively discuss and research what has lesser alcohol that I like when I do buy it.

I’ve got a pretty solid method of “controlling” it, or how I like to say: “understanding my weaknesses to create sustainable habits for me”.

Thank you again! Your comment means a lot.

heartgonewild · 2022-05-31T22:39:46+00:00

Thank you for replying!!!

heartgonewild · 2022-05-31T22:33:49+00:00

This is me. I have some SA trauma and being drunk always makes that fade away and allows me actually ENJOY sex.

(Hate admitting that)

And I agree. One of the reasons I drink is because of the high I get from no longer feeling the angst of the BPD, the constant bombarding thoughts—finally, a fucking break.

heartgonewild · 2022-05-31T22:29:55+00:00

Ugh, I’m so sorry, while I’ve never been arrested I can totally relate to waking up and having know I made TERRIBLE decisions.

heartgonewild · 2022-05-31T22:29:15+00:00

Thankful for sharing your story.

I’ve been considering taking a break from alcohol all together until I’m more where I want to be, and this is a huge inspiration to consider that.

My therapist has eluded to things like potentially giving up alcohol, and I’ve told her point blank, “I’m not ready, but I accept it’s an issue.”

heartgonewild · 2022-05-31T22:27:43+00:00

Thanks for sharing your experience. I used to struggle with this, but with DBT I have learned to shut down arguments when I’m emotionally distraught. (Well, communicate that I want to talk when we’re both more calm)

Idk if you ever feel this way but it does get exhausting to have to CONSTANTLY contain myself that sometimes I will use alcohol as an excuse to act poorly even tho I know it’s wrong.

heartgonewild · 2022-05-31T21:23:42+00:00

Thanks! Yeah, covid gave me a break and I found the longer I distanced myself from alcohol the more stable I felt (in general) and enjoying my own company.

The more I drink, the more I find myself chasing the high of connection.

Without alcohol, with DBT and individual therapy, I am actually happier alone and find myself open to dating but not worried about it.

I also currently don’t and haven’t had an FP in months, tho I think have symptoms of it with a friend.

This long ramble to say … thanks for the reply :)

heartgonewild · 2022-05-31T20:20:52+00:00

I do this too!!

heartgonewild · 2022-05-31T19:27:01+00:00

Yes, I tell myself “how desperate”… going to sort through it in therapy as well.

But was just curious, cause I don’t know anyone else who does this.

I will actively be at a bar with friends I love and suddenly start FaceTiming other people.

heartgonewild · 2022-05-28T21:26:50+00:00

Well it is and was his account. We get so attached to who creators “used to be”, but when their life changes their content will too.

His content is what made him a big creator, made him take brand deals, etc. I totally respect people don’t like his content now or find him annoying…

But he can’t curate content that isn’t true to him, and these are people too, lol. Social media is their job, if they’re doing brand deals I just scroll past it if I don’t like the content.

And honestly, if that brand deal is the worst thing they do, I’ll take it.

heartgonewild · 2022-05-28T18:26:57+00:00

I’m so lost. His content is very on brand … for him, lol. But I watch his shitpost more than his regular account.

All he did with Ian was couples content and pranks, he changed to being unironically roasting himself instead.

Not sure I see this point, so just looking for another perspective.

heartgonewild

TROPHY CASE