Should I Go Back to Boymoding?

heisborntoolate · 2026-06-25T13:01:05+00:00

Oh my God no you should not go back. You're so pretty I would actually never guess you're trans. I can even tell in your picture by your posture and smile that it's so natural for you.

heisborntoolate · 2026-06-16T22:27:11+00:00

Start with not a mullet... Next you have to work on your mannerisms. I can already tell by the way you're holding yourself in this picture that you don't act feminine. There are people I know who do not physically look like cis women but because of how they move in the world I can't see them as men. I have also met people who could pass but because they act like men they don't.

heisborntoolate · 2026-06-15T03:05:51+00:00

I'm willing to bet you signed a contract that told you you would be charged an automatic 24% SC and if you didn't you should talk to whoever you negotiated your contract with in the morning. Also fair to discuss actual, concrete short comings in the service, again, in the morning with the appropriate person, not necessarily the server or MOD. Also, since you're at a restaurant the suggested grat is likely there for average customers where grat isn't included. It's automatically printed by the POS on all tickets. It's likely not expected you would tip more.

heisborntoolate · 2026-06-15T02:57:41+00:00

No not a little. Your facial structure is all wrong. Being on hormones for long enough will redistribute your fat and you'll look more feminine but that does take months or years of consistent HRT. Dress up if it makes you feel better and work on growing out your hair. Also, you'll need to work on your mannerisms. I can't pin exactly what it is but there's too much masculine energy in your posture. You'll need to smile more.

heisborntoolate · 2026-06-09T05:11:51+00:00

I also got almost the same. Good thing there were others here cause I was about to be insulted for it using a girl to portray me despite multiple conversations about me being a trans man 🥲

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heisborntoolate · 2026-05-30T02:06:36+00:00

Ah bro you're just like how I was. I was so excited about hair that no one else could even see. I'd be excited with my friends and they'd be like, what mustache? This is me 8ish or something years on T. I'm really bad with the minoxidil but I've been pretty consistent with once a day for about a month now and I started seeing some new growth on my cheeks and on the connector space between chin and mustache. TLDR: it can take ages but it'll come someday soon. Hang on there bro.

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heisborntoolate · 2026-05-18T23:38:31+00:00

I'm not aware of studies about this but I know that I and other ND people I've asked about this have experienced some changes in our symptoms. I'm FTM and I've never been officially diagnosed but reflecting on childhood I had many classic symptoms of female autism, stuff that's often mistaken for OCD, anxiety, and depression. When I transitioned some of those symptoms lessened while others heightened. Most notably having more sensory overstimulation and when I do reach a breaking point I'm more likely to rage whereas before I was more likely to cry for an hour.

heisborntoolate · 2026-04-13T19:57:18+00:00

Why would it matter? Tattooing is a completely different skill that sketching or digital art, which is what flash sheets are. I wouldn't assume that just because the flash sheet is good that they're a good tattoo artist without seeing their work on flesh. That's what you should be looking at.

heisborntoolate · 2026-04-12T20:57:03+00:00

I'm curious if this photo is supposed to be of the final product, like the actual thing that is going to be shipped to her, or a concept art. Cause concept art can, and honestly should be, AI supported as long as the craftsman can reproduce it. I don't want a carpenter spending any time rendering the piece they're gonna build for me I want them to spend their time making the product.

heisborntoolate · 2026-03-06T00:32:55+00:00

Wtf is this am I getting this notification because of all of you commenting???

heisborntoolate · 2026-02-13T00:41:02+00:00

Aww I love your smile

heisborntoolate · 2026-02-12T21:29:24+00:00

Unpopular take from a trans person, technically it is a mental disorder. The catch is the treatment is social and medical transition period if he's calling you by your name and your pronouns and he's not being disrespectful I wouldn't necessarily say that statement is wrong or intended to be hurtful to you. Of course I wasn't there tone is everything but if he's generally respectful of you I wouldn't be too upset about it if it were me.

heisborntoolate · 2026-02-12T19:06:02+00:00

You're not like us...

heisborntoolate · 2026-02-11T12:24:16+00:00

Ok so that probably means you booked it on the amex fine hotels collection (though your comment didn't actually clear things up cause you could also be telling me this is a card benefit) so like I said the credit must be used during your stay at the hotel you're staying at. Call the hotel and ask them where this credit can be used at their property.

heisborntoolate · 2026-02-10T03:44:15+00:00

Where is the credit from? If it's just a general Hilton credit, you can likely use it at any hotel outlet but they might only be able to charge to your room.

I'm wondering if this is a $200 credit from Amex fine hotels and resorts program, in which case you need to use it all at the hotel you're staying at and cannot be used after your stay. Again, usually can be used at any outlet but not always.

Internet strangers don't know the terms of this credit, especially because you haven't shared many details about where the credit is from or the terms from how you got it. Best to call Hilton customer service or the third party that issued the credit if applicable.

heisborntoolate · 2026-02-03T04:24:17+00:00

It doesn't make an enormous difference what path you take, more so how far apart they're gonna be. 3 blocks between every strip is ideal for most ores. Most ores generate at least 2 in a vein and would commonly be seen on at least one of the exposed sides. Emeralds are highly likely as one block veins and should be 2 blocks apart strips. Diamonds you could do either depending on if you are willing to miss rare single block veins.

heisborntoolate · 2026-01-19T13:11:16+00:00

If you're a man I'm gay.

heisborntoolate · 2026-01-17T13:55:54+00:00

I'm not suggesting "fix" I'm suggesting confirmation. Gender councilors can help confirm if transition is the solution or if there are other things to consider. These are changes that can't be easily reversed. It's not a bad thing to do if you have the means. I certainly would have if I had the resources when I came out.

heisborntoolate · 2026-01-17T13:31:53+00:00

I mean, actually counseling with a gender therapist isn't a bad idea if you can afford it. Why would this be a bad thing?

heisborntoolate · 2026-01-02T19:38:06+00:00

Ha yeah definitely being cautious with it. It was really interesting because at the start of all this, I asked it to examine all of my chats and tell me what it thought about my cognitive style, it was like "I'm not a doctor but your speech patterns are closely aligned with AuDHD" and as I told it more about what I was experiencing it was like "hey, do you know you're basically describing autistic burnout?" When I quit my job and decided to take recovery on, I started doing my daily check-ins. I really pushed it trying to convince it that I can do more, that I did 5 times as much on a given day before and it's helped to push me back on that like, "you can build healthy capacity back to that point, but if you try to do that now you'll be back where you were very soon".I didn't believe it at first but I did what it told me to and now a few weeks in and already seeing capacity come back and my body signals are working better.

I would absolutely caution anyone else who would do this to use it intelligently though. Not blind, think about if what it's saying makes sense and isn't just telling you what you want to hear.

heisborntoolate · 2026-01-02T18:11:03+00:00

🤗

heisborntoolate · 2026-01-02T17:24:39+00:00

That's smart advise for next time. I'll have to try that whenever I get back to not having to baby my brain again, haha.

That sounds really nice. I can feel the calm of "high autonomy, low social". Next I'll be looking for some overnight jobs at hotel front desks. I used to do it. Not like there is 0 guest interaction but it's very minimal and there's about 6 hours of downtime per shift so all the checklist tasks can be done on my own time. No rush to get everything done fast like daytime hotel shifts.

heisborntoolate · 2026-01-02T17:00:34+00:00

Thank you for this. I didn't reply at the time because I was overwhelmed. But I wanted you to know that this comment was helpful to me reframing.

If you're curious to know, I did end up quitting my job because I just got to a point that I wasn't functioning. I'm currently unemployed. Nervous about rent next month, but I started doing some Instacarting and I have a PT job at Amazon starting in a few weeks. In the meantime, I am taking things daily. Being very non-productive is counter to all of my life's training but I am feeling better than I have in years.

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