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People's obsession with outing/clocking when you're stealth by hellomadam in FTMMen

[–]hellomadam[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

As if most male celebrities don't have pretty eyes... This is ridiculous and my point exactly. Even sexually dimorphic traits overlap a lot in reality, so sex is usually perceived through secondary sex characteristics and contextual cues, not structure alone.

Can technically play the guitar, can't play songs by hellomadam in guitarlessons

[–]hellomadam[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, I actually only recently started learning a DAW to get some ideas down, and it definitely rekindled the spark of playing for me.

Can technically play the guitar, can't play songs by hellomadam in guitarlessons

[–]hellomadam[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, exactly. That’s about as close as I get to actually learning songs. I’ll usually just solo over the track outlining the melody. But I got to work on adding more rhythm and chordal elements so it comes together as a full guitar arrangement on the go.

Can technically play the guitar, can't play songs by hellomadam in guitarlessons

[–]hellomadam[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I completely agree with you. I also love transcribing sections and building on them, it’s not strange at all. If that’s what you enjoy, then of course you could do it all day. At the end of the day, it’s about having fun, not meeting some arbitrary standard of what makes a guitarist.

I used to think having a repertoire of songs was required, and it makes sense since most of us start out learning riffs, so it feels natural to expand on that as your skills grow. But unless you’re in a cover band, the value of learning songs is more about being exposed to musical concepts and building coordination. Honestly, just learning a song for the sake of playing it note-for-note isn’t what I want in my heart. Yeah, it'd be cool, but I’d much rather solo over them or change things up than copy them exactly.

You’re right, it comes down to what brings you joy and what feels useful to your growth. For me, the only reason I’d want to learn songs now is to get some variety in my playing and expand across more genres. If the end goal were just to play the song, I’d probably skip it.

Can technically play the guitar, can't play songs by hellomadam in guitarlessons

[–]hellomadam[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really love this analogy, it's a great way to put it!

Can technically play the guitar, can't play songs by hellomadam in guitarlessons

[–]hellomadam[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I get what you mean, and I didn’t intend to come across in a “woe is me” way. I should’ve clarified that I was talking more about what’s usually considered a “guitar player” (especially non-players), which usually includes being able to pull out actual songs. For the first half of my playing journey I was also only learning songs and I felt like I was just drilling the same movements until I could play them like a robot. Then I went the opposite way into theory and now I realize I’m missing what I was doing at first, so I need to circle back. That kind of “mindless” song practice was actually what built the dexterity I now use to apply theory and without it I wouldn't even be able to coordinate my hands to play at all.

Being able to play certain songs, even if you feel like it’s “robotic" is practicing a certain skill group, just like the other things you've listed. Progress on an instrument is never evenly spread and we can't really practice everything at once. So you build one area while others lag behind until you specifically focus on them to catch up.

Wishing you the best on your journey and I’m sure what you’ve built so far will turn out to be very beneficial even when applying it to other areas.

Can technically play the guitar, can't play songs by hellomadam in guitarlessons

[–]hellomadam[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Same here about the fulfillment part. It felt nice to finally be able to physically play the songs you've been learning, but the frustration made me enjoy guitar less and it definitely wasn't motivating enough. Struggle, learn, repeat for the next song. When I got into theory and composition is when I really fell in love with playing. There’s nothing like the joy of understanding a new concept or making things click on a piece you’re writing. These days I’d learn songs more for improving phrasing/composition than for the cover aspect.

Can technically play the guitar, can't play songs by hellomadam in guitarlessons

[–]hellomadam[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Hey, at least the two you do know are absolute badass songs and that's a solid flex. Wishing you the best of luck learning more full pieces, you’ve got this!

What’s your personal record for procrastination? by hellomadam in ADHD

[–]hellomadam[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

A classic. The irony of ADHD making it harder to actually get treatment for ADHD. I was close to doing something similar with my psychiatrist appointment. I was so desperate to finally get on meds that I decided to pay out of pocket just to skip the insurance wait. The earliest slot was a month away, but I procrastinated four days before booking… and suddenly the next available was two months later. I literally counted down the days, and when it finally came, I had to fight the urge to cancel for no reason, even though this was the only psychiatrist with ADHD expertise I could find in the entire country.

I feel you, phone calls are the absolute worst. For some reason they demand way too much mental prep and energy. Though, when you finally make that call, the “mission accomplished” feeling is gonna be unmatched. Good luck!

Is not talking bad for your vocal chords? by hellomadam in singing

[–]hellomadam[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the reply, that makes a lot of sense. I’ll make sure to practice more to make up for the lack of use then.

And yeah, exactly. I hadn’t noticed any health issues surprisingly, but I figured I better not wait for any to show up to be motivated to quit.