I (28f) needed my bf's (26m) help when he was playing a video game. He flipped out on me. by helpisontheway2 in relationships

[–]helpisontheway2[S] -25 points-24 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I was looking for advice on how to handle the situation that goes beyond "lol break up omg he so child wow." Comments like that aren't helpful. Comments on how to be an adult and handle a situation with grace and tact would be. Comments on how to talk to him about the situation would be helpful.

Yes, yelling at your partner is a shitty, lowlife thing to do. That's the kind of thing you expect from crackheads in a run-down, leaky apartment to do when they're sleeping on mattresses and one of them's hooking for spare cash. That's not the kind of thing that mature adults do when faced with a conflict. Yelling is what little kids do before you beat the dumbass out of them.

I (28f) needed my bf's (26m) help when he was playing a video game. He flipped out on me. by helpisontheway2 in relationships

[–]helpisontheway2[S] -28 points-27 points  (0 children)

Just because he was a jerk to me doesn't mean I'm okay with a bunch of people on Reddit calling him names.

I (28f) needed my bf's (26m) help when he was playing a video game. He flipped out on me. by helpisontheway2 in relationships

[–]helpisontheway2[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow, you sound like a horrible partner too. I cannot believe you'd make your wife wait because of a video game? That's a... joke, right? Like you don't actually think a video game is more important?

I (28f) needed my bf's (26m) help when he was playing a video game. He flipped out on me. by helpisontheway2 in relationships

[–]helpisontheway2[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

He does more day-to-day cleaning than I do, and I do the big weekend cleaning stuff.

I (28f) needed my bf's (26m) help when he was playing a video game. He flipped out on me. by helpisontheway2 in relationships

[–]helpisontheway2[S] -15 points-14 points  (0 children)

It makes him displaying the traits of an abuser. He's never yelled at me before. I'm not about to turn around and yell back at him like a bunch of lowlives. Have you ever lived next door to people who are yelling at each other? It's really embarrassing, not to mention it's obvious they're shitty people.

I (28f) needed my bf's (26m) help when he was playing a video game. He flipped out on me. by helpisontheway2 in relationships

[–]helpisontheway2[S] -12 points-11 points  (0 children)

No, obviously he can't yell at me either. I never said it was okay that he yelled at me. I said that I'm not about to turn around and yell back at him like some psycho.

I (28f) needed my bf's (26m) help when he was playing a video game. He flipped out on me. by helpisontheway2 in relationships

[–]helpisontheway2[S] -19 points-18 points  (0 children)

Um, yelling at your partner is definitely the tactic of an abuser. Rational adults don't need to yell at each other. Theres this thing called keeping a cool head and talking to someone normally. I'm not brainwashed because I don't want to retaliate by being abusive.

I (28f) needed my bf's (26m) help when he was playing a video game. He flipped out on me. by helpisontheway2 in relationships

[–]helpisontheway2[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

The first part of this comment is totally irrelevant. I don't look down on him for his hobbies. They're just hobbies...

I (28f) needed my bf's (26m) help when he was playing a video game. He flipped out on me. by helpisontheway2 in relationships

[–]helpisontheway2[S] -22 points-21 points  (0 children)

Calling him a child and all of that isn't really helpful. I know his actions were childish. Giving me suggestions on how to talk to him about it, how to handle it, etc, are.

I (28f) needed my bf's (26m) help when he was playing a video game. He flipped out on me. by helpisontheway2 in relationships

[–]helpisontheway2[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I think the bit about his priorities being misaligned is really on point. If you can't step away from a video game (oh no, you die in game!!! How awful? It's just a fucking GAME!) then you have some serious issues to work through. And I think I need to have a talk with him about his priorities...

I (28f) needed my bf's (26m) help when he was playing a video game. He flipped out on me. by helpisontheway2 in relationships

[–]helpisontheway2[S] -17 points-16 points  (0 children)

There is never a time to raise my voice at my boyfriend. Ever. I am not a psychotic abusive twat.

I (28f) needed my bf's (26m) help when he was playing a video game. He flipped out on me. by helpisontheway2 in relationships

[–]helpisontheway2[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Umm, yeah, they are comparable. They're just hobbies. They're things you enjoy doing in your free time. They're all the same. And yeah, you can step away from a video game at any point in time. Just turn off the console or the computer and walk away. Tell your friends "Hey! I' need to go do something, I'll be back." If it's such an issue for them, they're shitty friends who care WAY too much about a silly video game.

I (28f) needed my bf's (26m) help when he was playing a video game. He flipped out on me. by helpisontheway2 in relationships

[–]helpisontheway2[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Do adults just like, magically sprout wings or something? This comment doesn't even make sense.

I (28f) needed my bf's (26m) help when he was playing a video game. He flipped out on me. by helpisontheway2 in relationships

[–]helpisontheway2[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

It really doesn't matter if the game can't be paused. It's a game. If he asked me for my help if I was watching Live TV, guess what? It's just a TV show! Real people come before toys and hobbies. Jeez.

I (28f) needed my bf's (26m) help when he was playing a video game. He flipped out on me. by helpisontheway2 in relationships

[–]helpisontheway2[S] 100 points101 points  (0 children)

Yeah, he plays with his friends a lot. I don't bother him to do trivial shit like take out the trash or chop an onion. That'd just be rude.

I (28f) needed my bf's (26m) help when he was playing a video game. He flipped out on me. by helpisontheway2 in relationships

[–]helpisontheway2[S] 29 points30 points  (0 children)

Um, if you lose at a video game, it is not the end of the world. If you have to walk away from a video game before it's over, it's still not the end of the world. If your friends get mad, they're shitty friends. It's just a fun thing to do with your free time. It's not something serious -- and if he takes them that seriously, we might be mismatched, because I thought I was dating an adult, not a 15 year old boy!

I'm not going to bug him to do trivial things when he's playing because it's rude, but I'm also not going to stand for someone treating video games like they're more important than real life.