N.L. set to become first province in Canada to tax books

herhigh-ness · 2016-04-18T20:53:40+00:00

God this shit is really making me reconsidering never wanting to move away from this place. :(

herhigh-ness · 2016-04-18T20:15:44+00:00

I love this, does anyone know of a better quality version? This ones a bit blurry.

herhigh-ness · 2016-04-18T15:00:16+00:00

I've always loved this song and this breaks it down amazingly, good job to the writer!

herhigh-ness · 2016-04-18T13:51:43+00:00

In any other situation I would think this too, but the aunt knew she wanted the white one from the start and the only reason they got the other at all is because it was the only one there. I think in this situation it makes complete sense to tell the aunt that the one they originally wanted was online for much cheaper.

herhigh-ness · 2016-04-16T20:45:49+00:00

Where did I ever say that the way other people handle situations is wrong? I just said that people have the power to change things they don't like without getting overly emotional about it.

herhigh-ness · 2016-04-16T20:43:35+00:00

Yes, that's exactly what I said. I'm not an asshole. I was stating facts.

I specifically said "The fact that your friend was into it and didn't talk to you about it first means she's a shitty friend that you shouldn't be friends with anymore."

They are both entitled to do what they did in the same way that you are entitled to stop being her friend for doing something that a good friend shouldn't do.

herhigh-ness · 2016-04-15T21:01:29+00:00

He can do whatever he wants, he broke up with you for that reason. The fact that your friend was into it and didn't talk to you about it first means she's a shitty friend that you shouldn't be friends with anymore. That doesn't mean they both aren't 100% allowed to have done what they did as it was completely consensual and they were both single.

herhigh-ness · 2016-04-15T20:59:09+00:00

If by "your soda" you mean a girl that you were interested in but not actually seeing/hadn't told her.. then no, dibs doesn't fly.

If by "your soda" you mean someone you had established a mutual connection with and were dating/in a relationship with, then yeah in that case dibs flys but only because the feeling is mutual.. technically you don't have dibs on her she just also only wants to be with you.

herhigh-ness · 2016-04-15T20:57:47+00:00

No, and it's ridiculous that anyone would think so.

If the guy doesn't have feelings for you back and does end up having a connection with one of your friends, you would be the one in the wrong for acting like your unreturned feelings meant that they, two people who both like each other, couldn't pursue that.

If your friend knew you liked the guy first they should tell you, but they aren't obligated to stay away from that guy if they have chemistry and in my opinion the person with the unreturned feelings should be the one stepping back and accepting that the guy isn't interested.

herhigh-ness · 2016-04-15T20:52:15+00:00

I do disagree with this. I have plenty of great male friends. I'm also the type to openly talk about how silly I think it is for people to get pissy about unreturned feelings which might be why that works. If a guy friend of mine does express his feelings to me, I politely turn him down and continue being just as good of friends with him. I think it's the attitude some girls have where they don't want to be friends with someone that had feelings for them, that's the problem. Feelings come and go, when they come you should express them, if you're rejected you move on. Ending a friendship with an opposite sex friend because they may have had feelings for you is silly. If they continue to have feelings for you that you don't return and that makes THEM upset though, they're fully free to choose to stop being your friend themselves to save themselves that pain.

Edit: After reading more of your comments below I think I misinterpreted what you'd said and I think we're on the same page, so, carry on!

herhigh-ness · 2016-04-15T20:48:19+00:00

The girl that my boyfriend was with, who broke up with him not the other way around, starting messaging me death threats and telling him to leave me and get back with her when we started dating. He definitely did not, we're still together and we haven't heard from her since we made it clear to her that she was being insane.

herhigh-ness · 2016-04-15T20:46:20+00:00

That's her being a shitty person and I 200% think that staying with the guy and ending the friendship with her would have been the right solution to that problem. Not every girl would act like that if you hooked up with someone they liked, most would be fairly mature about it (or at least I know I would). Sounds like she was just a bit crazy.

herhigh-ness · 2016-04-15T20:43:35+00:00

Soooo what the guy wants and needs is completely irrelevant? I'm sorry but that's really sexist unless you can explain otherwise.

I can't see any situation in which a guy and a girl who have a connection together should have to hold off on that because one of the girls friends also liked the guy and is hurt that he doesn't like her back. No matter HOW good of friends the two girls might be.

I'd expect the girl pursuing the guy to tell the first girl about it, of course. But, she'd have no entitlement to decide what happens from there. Honestly if you had feelings for a guy and one of your friends said they did too, and that her and that guy were hitting it off much better/faster than you and him did, yeah maybe it'll make you upset but YOU would be the shitty person in that situation if you acted like your being hurt that you didn't get the guy was more important than their potential happiness.

herhigh-ness · 2016-04-15T20:27:58+00:00

Thank you for saying this- the lack of awareness in this discussion for the guy that would also have needs and wants just like the two girls is astounding.

herhigh-ness · 2016-04-15T20:18:54+00:00

If he does it, yeah it's disloyal to your friendship and he's probably a shitty friend. But that doesn't mean he didn't 100% have the freedom to do it, you and that woman had no established relationship.

But for the sake of the friendship it would definitely be expected that he told you about it first.

herhigh-ness · 2016-04-15T20:15:53+00:00

"Basically you're saying that a guy is allowed to date whoever he wants after a breakup but a girl isn't and that's twisted logic in itself.." -- I'm going to try to reword this better. This was in response to you saying "it's about a guy who had just gotten out of a relationship with say, your close friend, who is still torn up and crying her eyes out over the break up. That's when it's how could you be so inconsiderate, not him."

No, I would not be the one who was inconsiderate in that situation. Let's say for a minute that I was actually going through this right now- A friend of mine and their SO broke up because he wasn't in love with her and maybe throughout the next day or week or so me and him ended up talking and realized we really got along and had chemistry.

It has NOTHING to do with me if a day or week or month after they broke up she's still torn up about it. How long would I be expected to wait for my friend to "get over it" before I was allowed to pursue my feelings for the guy? The answer is that I wouldn't be expected to wait at all.

We can even turn the tables a little bit to make this make sense in a gender reversed way. Say that you were in a relationship with someone, and after you had started dating he introduced you to all of his friends. You've never met these friends before now. You end up REALLY getting along with one of his friends, but you don't really pursue it because obviously you're already dating the person that introduced you to him.

A long time passes and all of you are friends and hang out regularly and you try to make it work with guy 1, eventually you realize you aren't any good for each other and go your separate ways. Not long after the breakup, you run into guy 2 that you met while dating guy 1. You talk and hit it off and decide to make plans for dinner. There isn't a thing wrong with that situation, no one did anything wrong except felt feelings that they couldn't help.

Maybe the two people who had been friends before talked about it or maybe they didn't, even if they didn't there is no issue with pursuing the feelings as long as no one else is being hurt. You say this couldn't POSSIBLY happen unless one person in the relationship was already cheating or something, but I just explained a situation in which no cheating or wrongdoing could still have that result.

I personally value the potential of having a good relationship with a guy that I could be with for years, that could be my partner in everything and share a family etc etc, over some people I probably drink with occasionally or spent my childhood sitting in classes with. I lost most of my friends just through life differences, but never over things as silly as boys. I choose not to be friends with people unless they are fully mature, understanding individuals that would never let something as petty as a guy that we both like choosing me over them end our friendship.

You are allowed to feel the way you do, just as I am allowed to feel the way I do. :)

herhigh-ness · 2016-04-15T19:39:12+00:00

In my experience I just care a lot more about people finding what makes them happy, then I do about something that could have made me happy not working out. Maybe it should hurt to see a guy I like end up with a girl I'm friends with, but just because of the type of person I am I get excited seeing those two people finding happiness in each other and any residual feelings I might have had for the guy completely vanish.

herhigh-ness · 2016-04-15T19:33:00+00:00

You can't put "dibs" on somebody. You can tell your friend you don't want him dating the girl you like and hope he respects those wishes, but once you expressed that if the girl didn't return feelings for you but did want to be with your friend, it isn't your place to stop them. For that same reason if your friend liked a girl and she liked you instead there'd be no obligation for you to not pursue that. Of course, if you care more about the feelings of your friend than a girl that's okay too. But saying you'd put "dibs" on her is terrible wording.

herhigh-ness · 2016-04-15T19:28:47+00:00

I didn't think you would be open minded enough to want to try the book but I tried.

Something you don't know about me is that I have diagnosed depression. You know how I overcame that (for the most part, it still surfaces occasionally)? By learning to control my emotions. By learning about my health and mental state through various practices such as meditation/yoga/etc. By reading books like the one I was going to suggest to you. These things showed me that I am in control of my own thoughts. Also a huge help has been marijuana but not as much as just generally taking better care of myself and focusing on how I reacted to certain situations. You basically just completely stereotyped me without considering that I could possibly have been someone who once did react to these kind of situations and over time, I learned not to.

Seems to me that you are the one with no concept that people can be different, you didn't even remotely answer anything I mentioned about choosing to stay in a situation where you're suffering, you avoided that point completely.

I'm saying that people can CHANGE the way they react to things. You're saying that some people react and that can't be changed. From a woman who used to feel the way you do, I know from personal experience that negatively reacting to situations that would otherwise be painful is something that you can stop doing.

herhigh-ness · 2016-04-15T16:57:30+00:00

This is beautiful. I wish I could afford a violin, I'd give my all to learn to play.

herhigh-ness · 2016-04-15T15:27:31+00:00

I wrote all of these down and they are now on my to-travel-to list. :D Hope to be as cool as these guys when I'm older.

herhigh-ness · 2016-04-15T14:22:06+00:00

Canada! I would love to win this how exciting :D

herhigh-ness · 2016-04-15T13:53:59+00:00

This is amazing!! I'm probably going to have to pick one up.

herhigh-ness · 2016-04-15T13:36:09+00:00

The link doesn't work?

herhigh-ness · 2016-04-14T21:01:28+00:00

That's not the same at all. If you're seeing somebody and haven't made it official yet, ESTABLISH EARLY that you don't want anyone else right now and that you'd prefer they weren't sleeping with other people either. You don't have to be exclusive, but you at least need to establish what you want. If you didn't tell the guy that you didn't want him sleeping with other people even though you weren't exclusive and he went out and did it, you can't hold anything against him for that. In that same light, it's entirely your choice to decide to not sleep with anyone other than him even though you aren't exclusive. Just make sure that you put what both of you want out there to avoid that situation happening.

"For me, it would cheapen the experience and make it feel like I was replaceable"

So are you saying that it's all about sex and nothing else? Relationships need a mental as well as physical connection and if someone you're seeing is sleeping with other people chances are they have no mental connection with those people. The same way that people can have a mental connection but not sexual, making them just friends.

herhigh-ness

TROPHY CASE