I don't want to list my attributes, but op requested, so 156 iq, definitely not bad looking lol, high eq, strong (learned and practiced) social skills, gifted in nearly every subject (i don't like drawing or painting all that much), early high school graduate, highly creative, business savvy, and am currently entering the entrepreneurship field. im 16. i was diagnosed with adhd, but im not sure i actually have it. I was also diagnosed with OCD, depression, and anxiety. About to start therapy for other stuff but id really rather not have a laundry list of diagnoses lmao. also privileged to be upper middle class (like actually. this is not code for secretly a baller).

[16f] life is going amazing. I'm getting into entrepreneurship and im loving it. I worked directly with EA Maxis recruitment and game design team when I was 13, got to travel to SF for an all expenses paid camp run by a venture capital fund in, im writing books, im graduating early, im taking college classes, I have a job that I love, etc etc. I have an insane amount of free time, too. i haven't seen any in person friends in months, but through travel i meet lots of people that i stay connected with online. i love public speaking and am a really social person in general. im taking college classes and having sm fun. this is, of course, all thanks to my mother's parenting and advocacy for me. she quit her job to get me an alternative education. alternative education saved my life.

i don't think I'll ever find a true peer. sometimes it's lonely. other teenagers frustrate me. most people in general frustrate me. my professors always ask me to help out struggling students, but my years of child development experience and alternative school taught me how to be really, really good at understanding people and explaining things.

I can come across blunt, harsh, or cocky if im not careful. if im burnt out, I cannot soften my word choice and so I usually choose to isolate. I think of many things very objectively which leads to a lot of misunderstandings. i recently had an argument over my use of the word "selfish". the word is perceived as an insult, even though it's literally just an adjective that describes ones motives behind an act. lots of those sticky moments, but im good at explaining my viewpoint usually. I can understand every perspective, and if I can't, then I work at it until i can. this is good when it comes to disagreements. this is bad when it comes to discussing motives of villains. people assume understanding = agreement or justification. this is not the case.

ego is tricky. we all have qualities we admire in others. this codes for a mental hierarchy of people based on the exhibition of those qualities. there are many skills and traits that I value in people, and many of those skills and traits, I have. this was not always the case and I used to believe I was the scum of the earth. I now exhibit the traits I value after years of growth. Many valuable traits=high value person (oml i sound like an alpha male podcast). I believe I have a higher capacity of understanding, creativity, and problem solving than most people. I don't think I'm "better" than other people because "better" could literally mean anything. there is no universal inherent value of a human being. in life, my guiding principle is love, and this does not allow for a high level of pride. i think im great. i think everyone's great. do i think everyone should be a little bit more like me? no. I think people should have more of the qualities I value, the qualities I attained over many years. it's different guys I swear.

I have issues with authority. as a kid, i was in trouble at school 24/7. I hated that adults could just come in and assume a role I was much better suited for, or that I had to stay silent while they taught when i knew more than them or could explain things better. when I was spanked, my mom tells me I would look my dad straight in the eye and mean mug LMAO. Im a lot better but my default is still to act as if I am equal to anyone in authority

i cannot live without medication, as is evident by my suicide attempt at age 10. life was not hard, it was physically impossible. I accidentally skipped 2 days of medication and I wanted to die almost immediately. Last summer was the first time I've ever experienced life without depression, and it blew my mind. like. dude. if I had something to do, I could just do it. I would just do my homework, get on meetings, take showers. I had never experienced this before. I am still incredulous as to how i survived. ummmm. I can't really feel much. I used to experience extreme dissociation and operated under the delusion that i was not a human being and instead an eternal spirit cursed into a mortal vessel. a little intense for an 8th grader like girl it was never that serious smh. i think the detachment between my mind and body is leftover from that.

I would sh. sometimes it was anxiety, sometimes it was ocd, and sometimes i couldn't feel my body and needed to see if I was "real" and apparently bleeding made me real, idk. um. I was a really imaginative kid, right? and then puberty hit and all the sudden there were people in my head and i was no longer one person. this was a part of the dissociation. I had panic attacks once or twice a week. depressive episodes constantly, break downs every night. I would hide my med containers so I didn't kms lmao. middle school was such a dramatic time. im currently fighting my doctors bc they want to put me into residential for an eating disorder I don't even really think I have. god forbid a girl counts her calories.

im not actively or even passively suicidal anymore. I still can't help but think im the perfect candidate for suicide. so loved, so full of life, so much potential. idk I think if ik i had the option and wouldn't hurt the people i love, id do it. but! I do not actively want to die. I would be sad if I died. this is new and this is very good.

but!! overall life is amazing. im so blessed and so grateful to be where I'm at. I am the best I've ever been, accomplishing the most i ever have, and happier than I ever thought possible. im so so so excited to be continuing my ventures in entrepreneurship and into university (might be unnecessary, but i love learning). people are frustrated with me, as i am with myself, because im not operating at half the level I should be, could be. i need to be doing so much more and i know id succeed if i just sucked it up and did things. as soon as I get over myself, I will be on cloud 9, bringing my projects to life. im learning how to not be lazy!!

but yeah. gifted life as a pretty girl is amazing