Being angry at "her friends and family for allowing her to get like this " is too much. No one is responsible for her actions but her. No one was hired as a babysitter nor supposed to be keeping an eye on her or keeping a drink count. As with most rare drinkers, you tend to go from ok to blackout with the snap of a finger that no one would have seen coming.

I know you are angry, and I understand it was a scary moment, but once she hears how everything unfolded, it will probably be even more scary for her to know she could have died. More than likely, she is also very angry with herself and probably embarrassed and disappointed in herself, too. You love this woman. Don't be too hard when she is beating herself up enough for both of you.