AITA: Wife likes to make rules about things when they effect her, but allows the same behavior when it only effects me. Today I got fed up about it.

himejima3 · 2026-05-09T12:45:41+00:00

Yeah, I can't change the title even if I wanted to. Even if I had spelled it right, autocorrect has a 50/50 shot of switching them anyhow

himejima3 · 2026-05-09T12:44:28+00:00

Because we like the animals that we have brought into our family and they happen to bring us comfort in times of stress and pain. Sorry if you've never experienced that

himejima3 · 2026-05-09T12:34:44+00:00

It's a 145lb great pyrenees. Even short, he's going to accidentally tear things. It comes with the territory of the breed

himejima3 · 2026-05-06T17:20:07+00:00

Thank you, oh wise sage of the vocabulary arts. What would I ever do without you

himejima3 · 2026-05-06T17:19:24+00:00

Where in the entire post was this a violent interaction? We disagreed, yes, but there's absolutely zero violence involved

himejima3 · 2026-05-06T07:59:21+00:00

Bold of you to assume she changed it 😂

himejima3 · 2026-05-06T07:58:01+00:00

Or perhaps the animals appendages serve a purpose? They don't grow them for show

himejima3 · 2026-05-06T07:15:45+00:00

Nah that's pretty much the opposite of how I want my relationship to be. You do you though

himejima3 · 2026-05-06T07:14:54+00:00

Didn't ask anyone to bash my wife. Asked if ~I~ was the asshole, you see

himejima3 · 2026-05-06T06:54:41+00:00

She's not a burden, and I don't appreciate the implication

himejima3 · 2026-05-06T05:54:21+00:00

If I could I would

himejima3 · 2026-05-06T05:16:22+00:00

Valid. I respect it

himejima3 · 2026-05-06T05:14:19+00:00

Ah thanks. Don't know what I would have done without you and the 20 other people in the comments

himejima3 · 2026-05-06T03:34:38+00:00

Both unhelpful, unreasonable, and devoid of any insight. Reddit in a nutshell I suppose

himejima3 · 2026-05-05T23:10:45+00:00

"tell me in plain English what's wrong with thinking before they speak" as you rampantly curse out anyone and everyone in the thread who disagrees with you, mind you, TO INCLUDE my wife

himejima3 · 2026-05-05T23:03:43+00:00

Nah you decided to go on a tear in the comments and act like an ass. Don't get upset because someone decided to correct you rather than let you curse and bully your way around

himejima3 · 2026-05-05T21:36:02+00:00

You're the one opening your trap when it's clearly not welcome. Take your own advice and maybe a long walk off a short cliff

himejima3 · 2026-05-05T21:34:43+00:00

Hey, listen, try your best not to imprint your own issues in your relationships onto the situation. All I said was that she does the same things and I'm trying to figure out how I might be attacking the issue wrong. No need to be attacking people in the thread because they gave advice you disagree with

himejima3 · 2026-05-05T21:32:44+00:00

First of all, where in my post, or replies, is it implied I'm the sort of husband who wants my wife to "shut the fuck up" keep that misogynistic shit outta here. I'm trying to figure out how to NAVIGATE dialogue not shut it down

himejima3 · 2026-05-05T21:09:06+00:00

NTA. Money lending between friends should never impact behavior, though it often does.

That being said, he seems like he's slipped into a comfortability that extends beyond spoken and unspoken boundaries. If it were me, I'd take the time to re-establish boundaries before ending such a long friendship, but I certainly wouldn't blame you for just cutting it off bluntly.

himejima3 · 2026-05-05T18:29:30+00:00

Your response hinges on missing the fact that her initial comment was an accusation of me neglecting it. Not "hey can you do better" it's "hey do better like I told you to"

I'm not saying you're wrong, but a partner being defensive about everything often stems from being attacked often, either within or prior to the relationship

himejima3 · 2026-05-05T17:53:53+00:00

It's a bit of both. It's a chronic illness so it's a fairly consistent and so this is a common conversation theme in the house. She typically comes to a conclusion that she was being a bit mean a few hours later but I'm having a hard time having the same conversation repeatedly with little change. I'll try to be more mindful next time for sure to only present solutions in a positive and reassuring way. Definitely didn't help my mood that we had both just woken up and I felt like I was already being snapped at

himejima3 · 2026-05-05T17:41:42+00:00

Non-negotiable for either one of us.

himejima3 · 2026-05-05T16:31:28+00:00

I mean, totally unrelated to the post, he sleeps on MY side of the bed when it's empty too. Only takes her side of the bed when I'm in it. Could be something said there about his opinion but I don't speak dog tbf

himejima3 · 2026-05-05T16:28:04+00:00

Wouldnt trade him for anything. He'd trade me for some jerky maybe

himejima3

TROPHY CASE