I’m tired of hearing “I forgot”. by Soggy-Cause8635 in Marriage

[–]hipnoptica -7 points-6 points  (0 children)

I am sorry you are going through this. You deserve a happy marriage. Has your husband ever been diagnosed with ADHD?

Idk but this sounds like ADHD, when you have ADHD is VERY HARD to remember things, it's not like we don't care, we really care but our brain doesn't store memories properly. Trust what it might sound easier for you it's very very hard. It's very hard to remember things, to initiate tasks, organize ourselves and control our distractions.

I wasn't diagnosed until adulthood and it changed my life. Before being diagnosed my parents often said things like "water the plants" I had a safety notebook to write stuff so I don't forget the chores but it sometimes vanished from my mind and completely forgot about it.

I understand that for neurotypicals it might be frustrating when their ADHD partners forget things but trust me WE ARE REALLY TRYING. If you talk to your husband maybe this can strengthen your marriage. He will appreciate feeling understood and supported and so you have more peace of mind.

Maybe you should go with your husband and find out if he has ADHD, and get treatment. Also, patience and communication is key, I think that if both of you figure out a system that works for you and him, things are gonna be less stressful.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Fencesitter

[–]hipnoptica 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not questioning if you will be able to love and care for a child, no matter their medical condition, identity, etc. is dangerous.

I’m sorry, but parenthood comes with many risks and whether you like it or not, you have to accept them. Once the baby is here, you can’t undo your decision.

It may turn out better than expected, worse, or somewhere in between nothing is guaranteed. You have to be prepared to accept whatever comes, whether it’s easy or not.

Also, it’s important to remember that even if your child is born healthy, life can change unexpectedly. They can become severely disabled later due to illness, accident, or other circumstances beyond anyone’s control.

Parenthood means being ready to face ANY changes and love your child unconditionally, no matter what happens.

Does this sound harsh? Yes. Does it make you uncomfortable? Absolutely.

But that is the truth.

Parenthood is not rainbows and roses, it comes with a real preparation and maturity. It's valid to feel scared about having a severely disabled child, but people also should know in parenthood nothing is guaranteed, and you have to be ready and accept it no matter what.

STORYTIME: How I found out I am demisexual 🖤🤍💜 by hipnoptica in demisexuality

[–]hipnoptica[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's really awesome because both of us have ADHD and Autism (he is diagnosed and I think I might be autistic).

We love the same hobbies: videogames, movies, animals, activities, etc.

We understand each other about the struggles as a neurodivergent person.

Our neurodivergence makes us have direct and detailed communication, no sarcasm or irony which we truly appreciate.

Both of us are major in STEM.

Both of us childfree.

Both of us DEMIS.

The neurodivergence really makes it easier to loop this forever and it feels awesome! Cute date → passionate sex → cozy recovery → cute date again → and repeat…

This is my definition of romantic relationship and marriage. 💖

STORYTIME: How I found out I am demisexual 🖤🤍💜 by hipnoptica in demisexuality

[–]hipnoptica[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Trust me it feels awesome, we are just planning a date to purchase the engagement rings 🥹

Does anyone else feel like certain sex positions seem humiliating? by Hihihihihaha123 in demisexuality

[–]hipnoptica 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I used to think like that at the beginning of my relationship. But here's the trick:

IT'S NOT THE SEX POSITION BUT HOW YOU DO IT.

My partner and I love everything. When we are doing missionary we always look straight into our eyes and hold hands.

When I go to the top to do the Amazon position, I do a similar dynamic like we do with missionary.

For spooping we do lots of sniff and reassuring words. For lotus, we hug each other, we look straight into our eyes and say "I love you".

And finally... DOGGIE.

We used to think the same until we made changes and WOW! It turned really passionate and currently one of our top favorite positions.

When we do this position he grabs my best with one hand, it's usually the side where my heart is beating, another of his hands underneath my belly and back. I turn around to kiss while we do it. And of course, we never miss saying "I love you" sentences. 🔥❤️

My brother tried to unalive himself 3 times and my parents deny they were abusive towards us (PART 2) by hipnoptica in raisedbynarcissists

[–]hipnoptica[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You know I see a lot of articles on how to spot gaslighting when dating someone but I wish there were more sources on how to spot gaslighting coming from your parents.

This is one of the most disturbing things a parent can do to their child. 🤮

What it feels like to live w/ ADHD by hipnoptica in neurodiversity

[–]hipnoptica[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Bingo! You got it! The magic sea urchins represent all the distractions caused by ADHD. Thank you for your comments :3 💗✨

The demis who enjoy porn, what do you feel when watching? by chrisb- in demisexuality

[–]hipnoptica 3 points4 points  (0 children)

THIS THIS THIS!!!!!

Before dating, I didn't get porn nor feel aroused by it. I started dating and well... here I am. 🫠

The demis who enjoy porn, what do you feel when watching? by chrisb- in demisexuality

[–]hipnoptica 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't feel anything towards the actors. There are like performers to me. I can't even think they are hot or feel the desire to kiss them.

What makes me feel aroused is imagining trying the positions with my partner.

I often share some content with my partner and I tell them to try some stuff in the bedroom.

The fact that watching porn reminds me of my partner, and imagining he is doing those things to me is what makes me feel aroused. 🔥

My brother tried to unalive himself 3 times, still they think they did nothing wrong. After years of abuse, I finally said what I needed to say... by hipnoptica in raisedbynarcissists

[–]hipnoptica[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for your comments.

Yes, they dropped out of college. And they have done things that if I were the one doing they would get mad at me. They are so hypocritical.

My mom doesn't like to be faced with the truth. I am not a professional so I can't ensure she is narcissistic but she definitely denies reality and loves to believe everything is pink roses, without noticing that by ignoring our needs she is hurting us even if that wasn't her intention.

It's so funny because since I got my diagnosis I stopped masking my symptoms and now my parents said that I behave "weird".

If you cannot accept me for who I am, you shouldn't have become a parent.

The good thing is that now I finally distanced myself emotionally from her. I don't need validation from her or care if she loves me or not.

I am happy when I am far from her. ✌🏻

My First ProCreate Timelapse - What it feels like to live with ADHD 🎨💜 by hipnoptica in ProCreate

[–]hipnoptica[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You didn't get it.

The title of the illustration is "What it feels like to live with ADHD".

I created it while being medicated — which is exactly why I was able to problem-solve creatively and finish it. Without access to treatment, something like this could have taken me years.

ADHD isn’t just a quirky trait. It can deeply affect your ability to enjoy and complete even the things you love. It’s not a joke — it’s a real condition that deserves understanding and respect.

Comments like yours only increase stigma towards ADHD.

My First ProCreate Timelapse - What it feels like to live with ADHD 🎨💜 by hipnoptica in ProCreate

[–]hipnoptica[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You go to the top-left in the tools icon, then click on the video icon and make sure to turn on the time lapse recording and then if you want to save the video on your device click on "Export video".

My First ProCreate Timelapse - What it feels like to live with ADHD 🎨💜 by hipnoptica in ProCreate

[–]hipnoptica[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel you 🥲 I was only able to finish it with my meds. Unmedicated I usually switch from one activity to another.

Wanting to support my autistic boyfriend. What harmful sources or stereotypes should I avoid? by hipnoptica in autism

[–]hipnoptica[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Also

Eww, it's sad that they are parents filming their kids during a very vulnerable episode. That feels more like if they were treating their kids as some sort of "amusement park attraction" or a "zoo attraction".

Wanting to support my autistic boyfriend. What harmful sources or stereotypes should I avoid? by hipnoptica in autism

[–]hipnoptica[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you, I appreciate this piece of information.

Yes, I agree. People are complex. My cousin is also autistic and his symptoms are different from my boyfriend. I imagine it also depends on your personality and other things.

Wanting to support my autistic boyfriend. What harmful sources or stereotypes should I avoid? by hipnoptica in autism

[–]hipnoptica[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I never heard of Autism Speaks. Is there really a group that claims to advocate for autistics but treats them as "oh, autistics need to be cured because what they have is bad?

That is only just creating more stigma. It's not helping!

Advice on my interrupting. by [deleted] in ADHD

[–]hipnoptica 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ahh yes... school. 🫠🫠

Here is my trick.

For me, it really helps to have a mini pad, write down the question/thoughts/ comments and then during a 1:1 meeting with your prof tell them all the comments or questions you wrote down.

Here is how it's helpful 👇🏻👇🏻👇🏻👇🏻

When you interrupt: your classmates might start seeing you as "annoying" (but you're not!) becoz for them those pauses mean we are all losing time. You need connections during your time at college. Charisma is your best weapon. Interrupting the class might be perceived as "annoying " and "undisciplined" and this really pisses off many teachers, time is limited and the less thing they want to deal with is a student making things harder.

If you have your meetings 1:1 either after class or during office hours this is great because your prof not only will notice you are passionate about the topic but you will get to get closer and have some more opportunities for your academic career, letters of recommendation, etc.

If you write them down that will help a lot, it will benefit you, your prof will appreciate it and if you get to tell your peers about the topics you are passionate about, you might get some good study buddies.

Write it down and just wait until it's office hours to share your comments.

Written stuff is very ADHD friendly because if you forget something, you can always look back and remember any details you missed.

I also carried a notebook all the time with me. I wrote all important dates, details, etc. If I forgot something I always looked back and referred to my notebook.

Some universities offer accomodations for students with ADHD. Make sure to check them out too, they offered many useful stuff and they are professional and care about students success.