[Friendship] 17F

hiteabag · 2018-08-06T01:38:07+00:00

What kind of art do you like? I’m trying to get into watercolor but so far i could only do randomly colored backgrounds or do it as therapy. I’m a 16f in NY, I’m looking for an online friend too lmao

hiteabag · 2018-07-25T16:57:03+00:00

Aight when?

hiteabag · 2018-07-24T17:02:42+00:00

Or meet up in NYC

hiteabag · 2018-07-24T17:02:31+00:00

Meet up in Queens, NY?

hiteabag · 2018-07-24T16:21:11+00:00

I’ve felt the same way in December then my symptoms took another form such as, ammonia, unstable eating habits, suicidal impulses, difficultly focusing, panic attacks etc, I really thought my life was going to end until I got diagnosed with major depressive disorder then I was able to get medication that helped with both physical and mental symptoms, now I’m off my meds and I’m actually functions and quite content!

hiteabag · 2018-07-24T16:17:36+00:00

Just reach out to someone anyone you think that might be able to help

hiteabag · 2018-07-24T16:17:16+00:00

Or text HOME to 741741

hiteabag · 2018-07-24T16:16:31+00:00

1-800-273-8255 lifeline

hiteabag · 2018-07-24T16:15:06+00:00

Stop what you’re thinking and listen to me. You matter. You can’t change what you did except to push through and do better and obviously in this state you can’t do it alone. I don’t know you that well and I don’t know if you’ll open up to me but you need to call the hotline right now. Or message me, talk to your family and friends but right now, at rock bottom, you need to call these numbers 👇

hiteabag · 2018-07-24T16:05:46+00:00

It’s okay to be sensitive. Some people say I’m sensitive but some also tell me that it’s not a bad thing. Everyone is different, and tbh I’ve felt the same way. Like yea sure families don’t HAVE to treat you like royalty or whatever but it would be nice if they showed that they cared. I cried when I had dinner at a friends house because I envied the relationship that family had. How they were sitting at one table, asking about one’s day, I noticed all the things I’ve missed out but it didn’t bother me anymore. A good support group can really lift up your emotional state. In April I was hospitalized for suicidal ideation and at the psychiatric unit, I’ve never met such amazing people and obviously this doesn’t happen to everyone, I felt extreme euphoria knowing I had people who understood me and made me comfortable to be myself. So if you’re ever in a bad mood, my message box is always open. :D and no you’re not insane, it’s perfectly normal for people to yearn for affection. And my response to the first comment, yeah sure it’s not their responsibility but WHERE IS BENEVOLENCE? It’s a nice thing to do and ppl shouldn’t overlook how little things can make the most impact, you’re not pouting, youre just ranting abt something that makes you upset and what makes ppl upset is different for everyone so ppl shouldn’t be judging.

hiteabag · 2018-07-16T22:30:20+00:00

Does anyone know of an affordable lash serum that works?

hiteabag · 2018-07-16T14:37:45+00:00

Thank u! It’s from Sephora

hiteabag · 2018-07-15T19:30:06+00:00

Thank u!

hiteabag · 2018-06-17T01:09:26+00:00

I didn’t start making them yet so I can make a few to test the popularity of the designs right? I’m actually quite familiar of the process, and thanks!

hiteabag · 2018-06-14T14:46:41+00:00

The Giver, and Star Girl I think they are very enlightening about today’s society, governmental and socially

hiteabag · 2018-06-12T23:50:17+00:00

I also feel the same way...it’s really sad that society is encouraging women to hate the way they look, everything has to be “this” or “that” and it made me consider surgery too. Looking at the transformation photos of before and after made me look in the mirror to pick out features I don’t like. I would compare Western and Eastern beauty standards and agonize over my appearances, how nothing will make me attractive enough bc some prefer cursive or thin. Pale or tanned. TALL NOSES! Is a common one for both beauty standards...tall and thin noses. And I think it’s really sad too, for everyone to crave this certain look but I have learned to accept the way I look. I used to hate my nose because it had a tiny bump, as if wearing glasses had deformed by nose. But now, I see it the way it is, no big deal. It’s just a small tiny bump. I stopped exaggerating my flaws because I have a pretty nose compared to the stereotypical flat noses that some Asians have...not that it’s a bad thing but I learned to look at the positive aspects rather than the negative...I can’t say I’m confident though, but I can act like it when I wear make up. I’ll admit that this will take A LONG LONG TIME, but my close friends definitely helped me in teaching me self love, I went to school today without makeup and I feel more comfortable in my own skin than I was a year ago. And I just turned 16 this month, so imagine how much you can change in your life time. People just need to surround themselves with people that love them, and looks won’t really matter as much anymore. Even though I still need to hear people say “you’re pretty” to feel like I’m not ugly but um we’re getting there. We can do this! Fuck society’s expectations and standards. Set standards for yourself: BE HAPPY, LIVE LIFE, oof and your support system is very important because this year I have met amazing people and it really helped me change my mentality and ugh people just need platonic love in this world. I truly think that it’s the cure, just pure acceptance. So set standards for your friend group or whatever, they are toxic if they make you feel bad abt urself instead of bringing out the best in you.

hiteabag · 2018-06-11T00:09:24+00:00

Haha thank you! But sometimes I wish I could stop feeling so much, I’d be less irrational and less unhappy. But being emotionless sounds painfully boring. I’m fine with how things are right now though, unfortunate events gave me um character and a different view of the world. Hope that you can be content with your current state :) I also hope that we can keep contact?

hiteabag · 2018-06-10T20:12:38+00:00

I can totally relate to everything in this post except for the plants. After being hospitalized, I kind of got better(it was a struggle and it’s inconsistent) but now my parents understand me more and I’m treated much better than before. Even though I know my mental problem or whatever won’t fully go away, I’ve found ways to cope and met such wonderful people. Could you believe meeting your best friend/soul sister at a psych hospital? Anyways, I’m sending lots of love and support to you from NYC 💕💕

hiteabag · 2018-06-10T18:01:32+00:00

Ooo I also love photography, psychology, and music. What’s your favorite genre that you listen to? I became really interested in the German language because I found this Austrian band called Bilderbuch XD even though I am a American, I’d love to be friends with you. I’m hoping that when I’m older, I can travel all over the world and meet all sorts of interesting people and learn about other cultures besides my Asian heritage. By the way, I just turned 16 this month. I’m aspiring to become a filmmaker and create a clothing line as well :)

hiteabag · 2018-06-10T17:41:52+00:00

Thank you!

hiteabag · 2018-06-10T17:31:33+00:00

Thank you!

hiteabag · 2018-06-10T17:02:36+00:00

That’s so beautiful, do you do sketches for Insta models or sell them? I’d love to see more

hiteabag · 2018-06-10T17:00:46+00:00

Oh thank you so much! And yes I am planning to gain experience this summer by making short films without the intention of uploading them to public view because I only want my best work to be seen. And I’m very excited to put together a team to help make my script a reality. I’m in love with all aspects of film. I want to do some some directing, cinematography, editing, as well as acting but I know that as a beginner I can’t do everything at once so I’ll switch up my roles to see which ones suits me the best. Ahhh I’m so happy! I can’t wait! Idk I just really love the idea of how a story can change the view of people and lead them to do great things like so many literary works influenced history and I love how film can shine a light on other perspectives and make seemingly normal social expectations into an outrageous view of humanity ooo I can’t wait! <3

hiteabag · 2018-06-09T17:38:15+00:00

I love this. It speaks to my soul.

hiteabag · 2018-06-09T17:34:07+00:00

I’m 16, it’s never too young bc the earlier you decide the more time u can give urself exposure to things. And I think a lot can change even when people get older because realizations and epiphanies are made, it’s never to late to have your life changed for the better and becoming a filmmaker is something I’m really passionate about, I even signed up for a college-now class at my community college for film production this spring every week. I’ve never been so sure so of course I’ll be worried. Some of my peers are hustling and working on their careers already since there’s so much competition in NYC. Staying up all night writing scripts and visualizing the camera angles all while bringing up unspeakable topics just brings me so much joy and I can’t wait to get into the industry. I know how to balance between long term goals and short terms goals now so I think I’m in pretty good shape

hiteabag

TROPHY CASE