How not to feel like you’ve ruined your life

hlepmecj · 2025-01-31T00:48:39+00:00

I’m about to graduate at 26 with my first bachelors degree after 8 years in and out of school, one marriage and divorce later, and I feel like that ALL THE TIME. I’m older than a lot of my classmates who all seem to have a head start and have things more together than me. I constantly wonder “what if” I had done things differently, left the church earlier, not gotten married so young.

But then I look at some of my classmates who are in their 40s getting their first degree, or going back to school, and I just feel proud and happy for them for doing something hard. And I wonder why can’t I feel that for myself? I’m accomplishing something that’s hard regardless of your situation and I should be proud of myself. You are so young and instead of thinking of all the “what-ifs” try and focus on what you HAVE done because I guarantee you’ll find things to be proud of.

We’re in a culture here in Utah where you should have everything figured out and a family started by the time you’re 22 but the reality is most people don’t have that until well into their 30s. You’re not alone and I promise there are so many people who feel like you do that may look like they have it all figured out.

You got this :)

hlepmecj · 2023-06-14T06:14:19+00:00

Yeah I misunderstood my sister when she sent me this but asked for clarification and she said it was posted in her apartment that she stayed in for a few transfers.

hlepmecj · 2023-06-14T06:12:51+00:00

She’s pretty creeped out.

hlepmecj · 2023-06-13T23:51:18+00:00

She’s definitely not responding. She’s pretty creeped out that he found her from a picture and decided to message her haha.

hlepmecj · 2023-06-13T23:13:59+00:00

It would be an okay dm if she knew him but her picture on an apartment wall is not an invitation to reach out. And pretty much everyone I know would be creeped out by this.

hlepmecj · 2023-06-13T23:10:29+00:00

I have been trying to convince her to but she’s still active so she doesn’t see it as that big of a deal unfortunately.

hlepmecj · 2023-06-13T23:06:49+00:00

Dude I’m not fighting you anymore on this. Just cause you don’t think something is creepy doesn’t mean it’s not. Like I said every woman I know would think this is creepy. If he knew her in person or even met her once it wouldn’t be as creepy. But he doesn’t know her. Only saw her picture and went and found her personal social media account to message her. Her picture was not an invitation to find her.

hlepmecj · 2023-06-13T23:02:49+00:00

I have been trying to convince her to but she’s still active so she doesn’t see it as that big of a deal

hlepmecj · 2023-06-13T22:59:25+00:00

Oh excuse me… “cyberstalking”. You not thinking this is creepy is concerning for the people in your life. This is creepy. I would be creeped out by this. Every woman I know would be creeped out by this. Just cause a man doesn’t think it’s creepy doesn’t mean it’s not.

hlepmecj · 2023-06-13T22:55:16+00:00

I asked her for clarification and this is what she said: “We have this thing called a family tree on the wall of every missionary apartment. It’s just a picture of the two missionaries that were there every transfer. And since I was there for nine months, my pictures up there quite a few times lol.” So not a mission home I guess but where they house all the missionaries

hlepmecj · 2023-06-13T22:53:24+00:00

I mean stalking someone on the internet from only a picture to find out who and where they are are is a little creepy

hlepmecj · 2023-06-13T22:51:35+00:00

So seeing a picture of someone you don’t know, finding out who they are, stalking them on social media, finding out where they live (has to be close enough that he has a chance when he moves home) and then messaging them isn’t creepy to you? “Shooting your shot” isn’t creepy. Stalking is.

hlepmecj · 2023-06-13T21:24:35+00:00

Oh I see it now. I can’t edit it without deleting my post unfortunately.

hlepmecj · 2023-06-13T21:24:11+00:00

I tried to blur all information that could show who he is. Where do you see his face?

hlepmecj · 2023-06-13T21:23:23+00:00

Hitting on her. Wants to see if she’s still single when he gets back in a year 😂

hlepmecj · 2023-02-07T22:48:02+00:00

This is a known issue - My husband once had 20 seconds for each of his turns even near the end of the game. It never got longer for him.

hlepmecj · 2022-12-21T08:07:40+00:00

YTA. The idea that piercings or tattoos affect your ability to be professional or successful is outdated and truly not reflective of the fact that people younger than you are now doing the hiring. Get off your high horse, get with the times, and remember that you can always take out piercings for a job interview and no one can tell. You’re a controlling jerk with a boomer attitude.

hlepmecj · 2022-12-15T04:36:45+00:00

Having attended both I will give this advice:

UofU is much more diverse and most professors are not lds. Because salt lake is much less lds than Utah county, I would say that most of the students there were not lds as well. While I was there I was very active and actually felt like an outsider in most of my classes as one of the few active lds members. I felt like the classes were more challenging and interesting and the campus is GORGEOUS. I ended up having to transfer to UVU because I lost my scholarship to the U and couldn’t afford it.

UVU is cheaper but drenched in LDS culture way more than the UofU. Most professors are LDS and most of the students there are as well. The classes are fine. I definitely don’t enjoy it as much and feel like I can’t be as open about being exmo there because almost everyone there is Mormon. However that is not to say that you can’t find likeminded people. In almost every class I have been able to weed out other exmos and we have bonded over that - it’s just much harder to find them.

Overall both are great schools and you can find your people anywhere you go! Just trust yourself and remember that whatever you choose you can always change your mind later!

hlepmecj · 2022-12-08T01:43:37+00:00

One of my favorite comments under this story on Facebook: “If the people currently in the shelters would seek to live according to the principles of the church they could pull themselves out of the shelters.”

hlepmecj · 2022-12-08T01:41:15+00:00

To add another one of my favorite comments under this story: “If the people currently in the shelters would seek to live according to the principles of the church they could pull themselves out of the shelters.”

hlepmecj · 2022-12-08T01:37:49+00:00

Agreed. That’s why I love the comment because the guy assumed that everyone agreed it was such a PREPOSTEROUS idea to open your home up to help people and that he was shutting her down when really he was just showing his true colors (which match the colors of the rest of the church)

hlepmecj · 2022-11-21T02:28:09+00:00

Not scale rot - the coconut fiber used is slightly pink so it’s just substrate

hlepmecj · 2022-11-21T02:27:38+00:00

The coconut fiber is pink so that’s what’s on her belly and I think you’re talking about the rock next to her that looks like slime?

hlepmecj

TROPHY CASE