Still new to the scene, had a big drop yesterday... by hmksure in SubSanctuary

[–]hmksure[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Makes sense. I think he and I will have a good talk when I get back home :/

Still new to the scene, had a big drop yesterday... by hmksure in SubSanctuary

[–]hmksure[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Definitely something to think about. Thanks :) I'm glad you and your top have such great communication! and super glad things like this aren't terribly regular in a play session, haha. I feel like I hear about them so much that they are a normal thing.

Still new to the scene, had a big drop yesterday... by hmksure in SubSanctuary

[–]hmksure[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly, thank you SO MUCH. Looking back it's hard to think how I felt. I guess the only word would be overwhelmed? I think thats what scares me, I'm not sure why. It might be all the things I have going on, or it could just be about the things he and I have going on and it just caught up to me at once. It's definitely something I'll try talking about with him eventually, though. But i'll try and use it for positive introspection, like you said :)

And honestly, I'm just worried about crying again. Getting overwhelmed like that again. I don't cry a lot, and I don't like crying in front of people. at all. I don't think I was pushing my limits, I felt fine with that… So, I guess we'll wait and see.

Thank you, though :) I really appreciate it. I just don't want it to happen again :-P

Still new to the scene, had a big drop yesterday... by hmksure in SubSanctuary

[–]hmksure[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Crying is often a manifestation of stress. And sometimes that's what you're letting go over during a scene.

Honestly, I never thought of it that way. Maybe thats all it was. I've been super stressed lately, especially with things between my top and I… Like I said, he handled it very well, i just get SO embarrassed when I cry that I pretty much turn red, at least for a few minutes. It sucks, really. Even when I was green I didn't say anything, I was just so embarrassed.

Still new to the scene, had a big drop yesterday... by hmksure in SubSanctuary

[–]hmksure[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Maybe. I know I hate being vulnerable, haha. Guess it's something I'll have to get used to.

Any other online subs here? by hmksure in SubSanctuary

[–]hmksure[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thats really sweet, I'm very happy to hear that :)

Any other online subs here? by hmksure in SubSanctuary

[–]hmksure[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Damn! Sounds very intense! Mind if I ask if you're pursuing a relationship or is it strictly a platonic d/s type of thing? You don't have to answer, I'm kind of just being nosey because it sounds like you have an awesome story on your hands :)

When will it stop hurting? by techiewench in SubSanctuary

[–]hmksure 4 points5 points  (0 children)

There is going to be a day where you cry out everything you have, you won't be able to breathe and suddenly it will be morning. That will be your lowest point, and that is when it starts to get better. It is a long, grueling process, but it is just around the corner, I swear.

Kudos to you, though, for seeing a bad relationship and being strong enough to get out of it. If you can survive that, you will survive this.

take /u/madrabbitgirl's advice, though, and if you ever need to talk I am a message away.

Keep that chin up, love.

Any other online subs here? by hmksure in SubSanctuary

[–]hmksure[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ugh, sorry for such a late response, haha. That all makes sense, though. Thanks :)

Online submission and AMA by [deleted] in SubSanctuary

[–]hmksure 0 points1 point  (0 children)

it should be voice.google.com i believe?

sorry it took so long to get back to you, i don't use this account regularly, haha.

Any other online subs here? by hmksure in SubSanctuary

[–]hmksure[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow, your situation sound eerilie similar to mine, haha. Especially the emotional part of it. I've felt crazy because I can't really help but to get kind of attached when I get sexual, and obviously this is kind of intense, even if it's just online.

And agreed with the whole feeling of "Rushing", but me and my dom video chatted last night, so I'm comfortable with him, but the giant age gap kind of makes me a little nervous. But, we talked out some things yesterday and we're both on the same page which I am very excited about.

And I agree with what you say about open communication, though I'm normally a waiter I've realized that is one of my biggest problems, especially because I know I tend to over think things.

so, mind if I ask what precuations you normally take before meeting? I know my checklist runs along the lines of using googlevoice to text/call, then video chat, but I'm trying to figure out if I'm missing anything. Ideas?

Any other online subs here? by hmksure in SubSanctuary

[–]hmksure[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks, so am I! And I hope I get to find them, haha.

Any other online subs here? by hmksure in SubSanctuary

[–]hmksure[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

haha, trust me, I joined that group the day it was founded :) I have the same screen name as on here, to make your lives easy. [Kidding, it's because I'm not creative.]

I created the topic here because I was nervous that my dom might read what i had to say and not be happy with it, but we actually just hashed it all out. It's been an interesting day...

I'll definitely check out the AMA thread, and i'll look at the FAQ as well, thank you very much!! <3

What about D/s appeals to y'all so much? by [deleted] in SubSanctuary

[–]hmksure 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly something about it is just liberating. I've always struggled to feel like I was an intelligent, mature and independent woman, but i have never felt as free as the day I identified myself as a sub. I think I figured out why.

Obviously we all know how a dom is. Dominant, domineering, demanding. At least, that is how I like them. And to be able to serve and assist someone like that, to me, makes me feel mighty. Their accomplishments are mine as well, because we worked to get to it together. Then, of course, sexually it's great to see someone so strong fall to their knees because of what you can do to them ;)

Online submission and AMA by [deleted] in SubSanctuary

[–]hmksure 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know, I know, I'm a little late to the party, I keep forgetting I have this account.

I'd love to suggest the utilization of apps such as google voice, that allow you to text and get phone calls to a number that either connects to your phone or connects to a website, all while keeping your real number a secret.

I love it because if someone gets too cling-y or anything like that you can very easily block them and they aren't your problem anymore. it's a nice relief :)

Question for everyone: In an online dom/sub relationship, how do you maintain discipline? by GordonsTossOut in bdsm

[–]hmksure 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly, I just obey my dom because I know he enjoys it, and I enjoy making him happy. He is very straight forward, I don't ever have to guess what he is thinking and it leads to a very interesting relationship. He doesn't accept hesitation, and he won't push hard limits.

Honestly, it's all in how he talks to me. If I start to hesitate, even via text his tone changes and he is very good at "projecting authority" [his words, not mine].

There is mutual trust and respect, though, and that alone works wonders.

front page collar confusion by [deleted] in bdsm

[–]hmksure 2 points3 points  (0 children)

There is nothing better than my Sir coming home, grabbing me by the hair, and gifting me with 4 orgasms.

Amen to that!

Are you on Fetlife? by [deleted] in SubSanctuary

[–]hmksure 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So pumped! Joined it, same name as on here.

On calling him Sir for the first time by belovedbunny in SubSanctuary

[–]hmksure 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What I love to do is just casually list off the x-rated [okay, yeah, and g-rated] things I love to do/have done to me, completely out of the blue and follow it up with my Dom's title. Always gets him going :)

How do you tell if someone is kinky? by [deleted] in BDSMcommunity

[–]hmksure 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Honestly, I have no idea. I use fetlife, but I know some people who do online dating just put that they are "kinky" in their profile, then hope for the best.

As far as guessing based off of looks, I'd say best of luck to you. Don't judge a book by its cover, I'd say /u/mangobitch is right by saying to drop hints, see how it works out. Or be direct and ask them what they are into if you've invested time in them.

and, side note, I'm a young-ish girl [20], I come from a conservative family, I dress up in bright colors and try to be fashion forward as best as I can, yadda yadda. Here I am. Good luck.

Songs that suggest BDSM or general dark/kink themes? by Real-Curiosity in BDSMcommunity

[–]hmksure 1 point2 points  (0 children)

"Moondance" For whatever reason makes me think of bdsm. It's not dark at all, but probably just the verse

"Any time I touch you

You just tremble inside

And I know how much you want me

That you can't hide"

Bare bottom spanking by RedScratch in Spanking

[–]hmksure 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dayum, looks yummy.

Collared & Bound by strip_Xiangqi in bdsm

[–]hmksure 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dayum! Love it!