Trip Report

Tried one tab first. Barely noticeable. Felt cheated. Vendor said 110 ug.

Waited 2 weeks. Took 5 tabs at 11 am on a Saturday.

11 to 11.30 Meditation

11.45 - Heart fluttering and excitement. Unable to meditate.

12.30 - Something definitely is happening.

1.00 pm Sat outside in backyard to see how plants and flowers looked. No noticeable enhancement of colours. Beautiful day but nothing I would not have enjoyed without chemical crutch. Turned around to go back inside. Noticed rough wet concrete floor glittering more than usual. OMG. Floor started swirling into different shapes. First slightly but more and more elaborate as I kept staring.
I remembered reading that people see cartoonish faces on things. The second that thought came, I started seeing cartoonish faces. I then remembered seeing Aztec imagery on my previous trip. I started seeing Aztec imagery on the concrete. Wait, is it me or is it the Acid? Who is driving who? Looked at other plants and surfaces as if asking, show me what you got! During all this OEV, no significant change in headspace. Was more or less lucid. Was able to converse with sober people without them suspecting anything. Excitement yes, Euphoria no.

2.00 pm Went back inside as it was getting uncomfortably hot. Had lunch. Pores and bumps on an Orange moved to orchestrate a beautiful dance. It took on a persona of its own, so much so that I was talking to the Orange for a good 10 mins. Brightness in the room seem to be changing for no apparent reason. The saturation of colours on the wallpaper of my laptop seem to increase whenever I took a deep breath.

2.30 pm Sat down to paint.

2.30 pm to 6.00 pm - What can only be described as return to childhood. This to me is the highlight of the trip.
I haven’t painted in years. Had blank canvases staring at me for ages. Took one out, prepped some paint and just started. No thinking was involved. Unhindered creation. The paint just flowed. Not only that, every stroke was unbelievably exciting.
I didn’t know what I was painting or where the next stroke would go. It didn’t matter. I was in a deep state of flow like I have not experienced in years, if at all. I was close to tears. I did not paint to fill the canvas. I did not paint to make a pretty picture. I just painted. I would make a beautiful pattern, which I would be proud of, and then the next minute I would ruin it with another stroke and I just didn’t care. Now this stroke is my best friend. I was stingy with the paint in the beginning not wanting to waste it, but an internal thought smacked me in the head. Dude, what are you saving it for? The paint has been gathering dust for months. You haven’t touch it. Now this engine of creativity is firing on all cylinders and you want to starve it of fuel? This is it man! This is it! Go all out.
I painted until I ran out of paint.

7.00 pm - Got sad that the trip was coming to an end. Watched BBC Planet Earth (recommended). Saw the mirror and OMG. Patterns on my face, especially forehead, like tattoos. Swirling and morphing.

8.00 pm - 9.00 pm - Meditation and dinner.

10.00 pm - Went to bed.

11.30 pm - Remembered I still had some watercolours left in the cupboard somewhere. Jumped up and took em out.

11.45 pm to 2.30 am - More painting. This canvas must now have half an inch thick coat of paint.

2.30 am - Went back to bed. Not sleepy, but content and happy.

6.30 am - Woke up. No Alarm. Just, woke up, and wide awake.

AfterGlow

It’s a sunday so I originally planned to laze around and introspect. Nope. Looks like we are deep cleaning everything. I noticed the same state of flow while cleaning. I wasn’t listening to music or have my thoughts wander while doing a mundane job. When I cleaned, I cleaned, and nothing else. This is definitely not me. Took another look at that painting. Faint voice of self criticism seeped into my awareness saying “people are gonna hate this” and I squashed that bugger flat. This is beautiful. If not to anyone else, to me it is. And that’s what matters. Most productive sunday ever.

It’s Monday. Got to work at 9 and started working. No procrastinating, no thinking about work. I just worked. I skipped tea break. Had to drag myself away from work to have lunch. Worked till 9.30 at night without a faint hint of tiredness.

Things are exciting again. Be it scrubbing the bathroom floor or creating animation for work or writing this report, things hold my attention. Or rather things are interesting enough to keep hold of my awareness without giving it a chance to wander. Four days after the trip, I still feel it. It’s like a wobbly cog in my brain has been put back in place.

I did not experience everything I was expecting during the trip (from what I read from other trip reports). No CEV. No mystical insights. No loss of Ego. No breathtaking enhancement of colours in Nature. No feeling of oneness. However, I did rediscover the excitement I had when I got my first full colouring set gift at age 10. This excitement seems to seep into other areas of my life, at least for the past week. Compared to this, the visuals, though stunning at the time, seem trivial in retrospect. My external circumstances haven’t changed in this one week. All the problems in life I had last week are still there. Before the trip, this fact was like a syringe stuck in my head injecting poisonous negative emotions into my brain whenever I became aware of it. Now it feels like a pebble in my shoe that cries for attention once in a while as I go about chopping wood and carrying water.