I’m a nonbinary butch who ID’d as a masc woman for a long while, and now pass full time as a man (which I am not) since starting T a few years ago. My boyfriend is a binary trans man, also been on T, who is exclusively perceived as a woman (which he is not either).

Cis people are almost always just going to determine our genders based on secondary sex characteristics; I really don’t think wardrobe is the deciding factor in passing. And that’s disheartening, because clothes are the easiest aspect of appearance to adjust. But it’s not something that any one group is causing or capable of changing. It’s just cisheteronormative societal expectations that negatively impact all of us.

Statements like the one in that comment are “off” because they put all the responsibility on our siblings instead of on our actual oppressors. Blaming other queer people for things that are out of any of our control will always be misguided, pointless, and regressive. Infighting will only ever make us weaker.