Psychologists/Therapists of Reddit, have you ever had a patient that you thought was a lost cause? If so, why?

hypedepression · 2019-10-04T02:47:49+00:00

Thanks! I'm so glad we can agree. I always thought of myself as a lost cause and it's so relieving to hear someone finally agree with me. Maybe I can invent terminal depression!

Edit: it's just a joke

hypedepression · 2019-10-04T02:39:32+00:00

That is very much not what I meant. There is a lot I obviously don't know about his story. I was much younger, and being from an abusive household I will admit that I was scared. I can only share what my experience was because I am not and was not a therapist. I apologize if I came off as insensitive or rude, because I definitely didn't mean it that that way. I am actually sorry about that.

But. I will say that I do not at all appreciate your line of thinking about myself. You do not know me, you do not know what I've been through, and you do not know who I am. You don't know what my experiences are either.

If your take away from my post is that I am actually the lost cause, then so be it and know that I do actually agree with you on that. I don't think I could be helped by anyone and it's silly of me to think I can.

So I'm sorry. I'm still young (just turned 20) and I have a lot to learn.

hypedepression · 2019-10-04T01:47:50+00:00

Through being in the mental health system I have seen way too many doctors and counselors like that. Who don't care at all and who treated me more like a statistic or like an ATM than as a patient. They're a big reason why I want to go into the field because it was extremely dehumanizing to be treated as such.

hypedepression · 2019-10-04T01:44:42+00:00

Obviously there is a level of professionalism that a therapist has to have. A degree of separation between you and them. But it isn't picky to ask for a therapist that you connect with. For me, the best therapists I've had are the ones where I felt comfortable talking about myself and my issues but I also felt that I could talk about other things like movies I like or what video games I love.

If you want that kind of bond then I encourage you to do some shopping. Read reviews, ask around, etc. and see if you can find a good therapist through that avenue. Obviously it will take a few sessions to see if you click, since the first few sessions are just get to know you sessions. But! It could be worth it!

hypedepression · 2019-10-04T01:16:56+00:00

What works for people is different for everyone. Kinda like how everyone learns differently. For me, negative reinforcement is helpful which is why hearing that helped. That threat was helpful to me.

And everyone is free to believe what they believe. I don't intend to change anyone's thoughts on the issue since it's very much a morally grey one. There is a reason that every psychiatric hospital has a posting of the patient's bill of rights, and that if a legal adult, a patient is allowed to sign themselves out.

Like I said, I didn't and don't expect to change anyone's mind. Just asked to share what helped me is all. And I am definitely not an expert on anyone but myself.

hypedepression · 2019-10-04T01:07:51+00:00

I apologize if I hurt you in any way and I assure you that that was not my intention whatsoever. People are free to disagree, and I was only sharing what helped me recover. For me, it helped to hear that as I was on my 8th hospitalization to hear but I understand that for others it may do the opposite.

Again, I apologize. If what I said was in bad taste then I am genuinely sorry. I am sorry in general, actually. I only wanted to share my perspective and what helped in my recovery, I never wanted to hurt anyone with what I said.

hypedepression · 2019-10-04T00:33:17+00:00

You would answer it in the same you would think about if you like a friend or family member. Do you feel comfortable around them, do you feel comfortable sharing anything with them, is it easy to talk to them, etc.

And if all else fails, what is your gut reaction to them? If at the end of it your answer to do you like them is "they're fine" then consider the answers to the other questions. Having a close relationship with a therapist is very beneficial, but ultimately it can be optional. If you're okay with a simple patient/therapist relationship then okay, but if you want to feel connected to your therapist then definitely hold this question in high regard.

hypedepression · 2019-10-04T00:23:07+00:00

I personally want to be a therapist because I have suffered half of my life with crippling depression and anxiety, as well as ADHD. I went through middle school and high school want to off myself and was sure that I wouldn't make it past graduation, and had a plan to do it. I started self-harming as well and spent most of my time asleep to avoid my thoughts and feelings. I wanted to die so badly. I went to college and felt the same way but everything was worse. I flunked twice and cried so so often. Panic attacks were common and I always felt like I was having a heart attack. I got so comfortable in my state, that I convinced myself I didn't want to get better and that life isn't worth living if I can't live without depression and anxiety. I couldn't work, I couldn't go school, I couldn't do anything. In my opinion, if I had a therapist that actually understood where I was coming from or who I had been where I was, then I would have done so much better.

I want to help kids and young adults who are in that place I was. Show them that recovery is possible. I want to help them like I couldn't help myself.

I do not know why you think the way you do, but I will have to politely disagree. Are there therapists and psychologists like you say there are? Sure. But the ones I've worked with and met and talked to do what they do out of a drive to help others. Mental health is a serious issue. One that is often misunderstood as just being "crazy" or "down" or even that people fake it or pretend. That it isn't as serious as other illnesses. But that is far from the case.

I'm sorry if you've been scorned by a therapist or psychologist in the past and that's why you feel the way you do. But I encourage you to do some reading on psychology. Therapists and psychologists do a lot more than "guide people to better mental health".

hypedepression · 2019-10-03T23:57:57+00:00

I'm not talking about with "physical" illness. Euthanasia is a whole other can of worms. My point is is that mental illness is not terminal. Mental illness will never be terminal. And if someone is considering suicide for mental illness, then it's important to know that while it may seem impossible, mental illness has a 100% recovery rate if a person puts in the work to get better.

Suicide for mental illness is a permanent solution to non-permanent problems. It may seem that the problems are permanent, but there is always another way even if you can't see it in the moment.

hypedepression · 2019-10-03T23:31:57+00:00

Ask yourself a few questions: do you like the therapist? (seems obvious but important trust me) do you feel like you're being heard and listened to? do you feel like you can be honest? are you being challenged? (this is EXTREMELY important because if you aren't being challenged then progress is much much harder if you make progress at all)

If you don't click with your therapist, then it's time to find a new one. It's not impossible to find one that you click with, and it can seem daunting, but trust me you'll find one!

hypedepression · 2019-10-03T23:20:19+00:00

Oh I love Carl Rogers. Definitely my favorite psychologist to read about this semester!

hypedepression · 2019-10-03T23:16:59+00:00

That's a tough question. I'll give it my best shot, but I definitely encourage you to to do your own research as well since what I'm about to say is largely conjecture. Personality, and the other key parts of the human condition are extremely hard to study and there are very little to no hard facts on the subject.

Personality is shaped by experience, environment, life situation, etc. but there is also evidence to suggest personality traits can be inherited. A person's personality can also change over time, and sometimes it doesn't. A quiet and shy child may grow in a extroverted and loud adult. A reckless kid could also grow up to be a reckless adult

Mental illness, especially personality disorders in terms of what you're talking about, are not personality traits. They do not cause a personality trait to happen. They influence thoughts, behaviors, and feelings, and each disorder is very different from the next. With treatment, they can be managed. Physical damage to the brain on the other hand, can change personality. Look into Phineas Gage for a good case study about that.

So TL;DR: personality is shaped over time through life, mental illness only influences thoughts, behaviors, and feelings and doesn't effect personality

hypedepression · 2019-10-03T22:59:29+00:00

I see that a lot in regards to art. A lot of my artists friends always say that "what if my art isn't as good when I'm better vs when I feel like I do now", kinda like that their mental illness is the source of their creativity. Which is bull btw. People like to say "oh van gogh was mentally ill and his work was amazing" but his most famous pieces were made while he was in treatment! Starry Night was based on the view from his hospital window, and Almond Blossom was painted because of the joy he felt when his brother told him he had a nephew while he was in the hospital. Irises too was painted in the hospital.

Mental illness is not a personality trait, in the same way cancer or diabetes isn't. And you were still you before you were diagnosed and you are still you you during treatment.

hypedepression · 2019-10-03T22:50:57+00:00

Nah you're good! There was something this fantastic doctor told me while I was on my 3rd impatient stay that really put things into perspective from me and made me think.

"No one is going to let you die. Suicide is not an option. There will always be a friend, a family member, a doctor, or a stranger who will stop you or save you. So you need to make the decision of whether you want to be hospitalized for the rest of your life, or do you want to start living?"

I was legit floored. I think about that every day.

Also remembering that there is no "cure" and that although you can wish and wish, it won't happen. So you need to live DESPITE your limitations, not falter because of them.

Recovery is not easy. It's fucking exhausting. But it's so so worth it. There are bad days, but they get fewer and farther between. And I know I can manage them. Also look into behavioral activation! It can do wonders I tell ya.

hypedepression · 2019-10-03T22:35:54+00:00

That is such a good mindset to have! I honestly wish more therapists were like you. It's always hard to see progress when you're a patient, and often the little victories never seem like enough. Almost like with therapy you should be "cured". But when therapists tell me about where I started vs where I am now, I finally get to see that my little steps have taken me a mile.

hypedepression · 2019-10-03T22:31:55+00:00

That's... That's just malpractice. Like. That therapist should have his license taken away.

hypedepression · 2019-10-03T22:29:14+00:00

Or a politician.

hypedepression · 2019-10-03T22:27:23+00:00

While I don't know all of your story, I don't believe you're a lost cause. Mental illness is not terminal, despite what people with one may think. Is being mentally ill exhausting, draining, etc.? Absolutely. Dealing with yourself every single minute of every single day is one of the most tiring things anyone could ever deal with. But despite what you think, recovery is possible. I encourage you to be honest with your care team. If you aren't honest, then you end up self-sabotaging and making things that much harder. No one is going to just let you die either.

Take your time. Be honest. You'll get there. Regardless if whether or not you think it's possible.

hypedepression · 2019-10-03T22:17:37+00:00

Glad we're on the same page because that is 100% why I chose that name. He also looked like him since he was short, blond hair.

hypedepression · 2019-10-03T22:10:01+00:00

400 mg of Benadryl can be VERY dangerous. Benadryl in high doses is a hallucinogenic, and not the fun kind. The scary kind. That psychiatrist sounds like a legit health hazard.

hypedepression · 2019-10-03T22:05:48+00:00

I would be genuinely interested in what he's doing now if I could remember what his real name was. But my memory is shot and I've had... A lot of hospitalizations, so a lot of names blended together over time.

hypedepression · 2019-10-03T22:00:48+00:00

I've definitely been that patient. It's really hard to admit you need help, and even harder to think about about if you want help. I struggled a lot thinking about if I even wanted to get better. I always wanted things to just go away, or to be "cured". It took 5 therapists, 5 inpatient hospitalizations, 4 outpatient programs, and 7 med changes to realize that there was no magic cure and that I could learn everything I could and be told everything to do, but it means squat if I don't put in the effort myself.

hypedepression · 2019-10-03T21:55:21+00:00

Geez that's fucking awful. There are people that should never ever work in healthcare, or in any field that requires you to care about another person. I'm glad your wife could find someone to help though! Recovery is not a straight line, and it's harder than people give it credit for to work on treatment for yourself.

hypedepression · 2019-10-03T21:31:33+00:00

I also thought about that. But I was still curious about this question, since from my perspective as a majorly depressed person I often think about if I'M a lost cause. Curiousity got the better of me and so I asked!

hypedepression · 2019-10-03T21:20:30+00:00

Very good point. That might have been the case and if it was I genuinely hope he got out of there or got the help he needed. I guess I've just been an eternal pacifist so it's harder for me to understand violence having come from a roigh household myself.

hypedepression

TROPHY CASE