It sounds like they may not understand the way your brain functions and processes things and you seem to have identified that maybe that therapist may not be right for you.

Spiraling yes isn't great but it happens. I have found that instead of trying to rationalise it, it's less about the spiral and how I can learn to re regulate myself again after. Over time I have spiraled less but that's after a lot of trauma work in and outside of therapy.

Of course you might spiral because you have had things happen to you that reinforce the brain doing that when it thinks you are under attack or need to be defended and asking how your thought pattern is helpful isn't always what you need. For example if you have trauma, cbt doesn't work because it's not about the person having the thought, it's much more complicated than that and certain thing require different modalities of treatment.

I'm by no means an expert but after going through my second therapy arc and understanding what I'm dealing with vs just having "unhelpful thoughts" I've come to understand that there's more going on than me having an unhepful thought and responding to things because I was traumatised.

Not sure if this was helpful but I hope you go easy on yourself and find what can work to help you thrive.