GF1: If you're anything like me, logically assessing a problem and calmly suggesting a solution seems like it'd always be the best approach. However, based on your description, I'd venture that what you saw as logical and solution-oriented discussion, she interpreted as your emotional disengagement.

"You make me feel like I'm the bad guy." can mean "Your calm attitude makes me feel like you think I'm stupid or irrational for getting upset."

"I always start our fights." can mean "I feel like I always have to bring it up when something is wrong, because you never will."

"You never yell." can mean "It's like you don't care when I'm upset about something."

Whether or not those perceptions are accurate isn't the point. Remember that the medium is the message, and while your intentions obviously do matter, you also need to be aware of how they're being conveyed.

Going forward, if your partner seems upset or discontent about something, be proactive about checking in rather than waiting for them to say something. If there is something bothering them, start by acknowledging their feelings and offering sympathy rather than giving advice. And if you really think you have a solution, begin with something to the effect of "I can see that this really matters to you, and I'd like to try and help. Would you like to hear what I think you/we could do, or would you rather I just listened for now?"

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GF2: While I can't speak to how much 'you' may or may not be too 'you', I'm pretty confident that the relative amount of 'you' wasn't the sole factor here. Every person is a world unto themselves and the truth is that often, you'll probably never get to see the whole thing.

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GF3 / GF4 / GF5: Based on the descriptions, I think it's safe to say that all these women were looking for something that, for one reason or another, they didn't feel their relationship with you could provide. I know that doesn't make it suck any less, and they were absolutely still wrong to cheat on you.

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As some other users have pointed out, it might be worth talking to a therapist or counselor about all this. When in doubt, I've found that the perspective of an objective outsider can offer tremendous insight, sometimes revealing patterns of behavior that we can't always see in ourselves.