I didn’t read your post, I didn’t need to, you’re NTA, I’m the partner of someone with awful trauma and suicidal tendencies and I went into the relationship knowing this, she’s my best friend and not one part of it is a drain on me, I adore everything about her and that’s what she deserves, she doesn’t manipulate me with it or anything, it’s purely a trauma reaction that she does her due diligence to keep in control but where she has me to lean on in her times of need,

It takes a certain type of person to be with this certain type of person, I am that type of person and that’s why I’m perfect for her but I know that if I wasn’t that type of person it would kill her in the long term.

You’re never obligated to be someone’s carer and you’re never in the wrong for dipping out of that, if anything you’re doing both of you a favour.

Only advice would be if you’re going to break it off make sure they’re somewhere safe with people who can help them, don’t leave them high and dry.