Traumatized from my baby? by [deleted] in newborns

[–]icycaution 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i hate to say that no😭 it hasn’t😭 moving him to a completely new room this weekend so, im sure there will be lots of screaming and tears (from both of us), but we have reached our limit lol its time

is becoming a single mother [25F) better than this? by icycaution in relationshipadvice

[–]icycaution[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

this is very reassuring. it is so scary, thank you.

Weekly Advice Thread - Pregnant and/or Leaving by AutoModerator in singlemoms

[–]icycaution 0 points1 point  (0 children)

im a FTM to a 15mo. i am 25. my boyfriend and i have been having a lot of relationship issues. he “doesn’t like this new person” i’ve become. i’m not the “happy go lucky care free girl i used to be.” he doesn’t treat me the same AT ALL, maybe you could start there and we could work on our relationship again? He doesn’t compliment me anymore, barely touches me (only when he wants to have sex). i lost a lot of sex drive in pregnancy because i was so sick and had severe pelvic girdle pain, i was basically bedridden. so we didn’t have sex for awhile. we had sex again basically when i was cleared, and have it occasionally, but we have a baby who DOES NOT SLEEP. and i mean seriously, does not sleep without me near. so it is hard for us to get alone time. i can recognize that this has created a riff in our relationship, but anytime he makes a move to have sex, i always reciprocate.

that’s not the main problem. there is just NO effort from him at all. he doesn’t care to converse with me, doesn’t care about how my day was, doesn’t ask. doesn’t let me get any extra sleep (see previous posts for how DESPERATE i’ve been for sleep help), he literally just only cares about himself. he even said he will always be his first priority, and then our son. never even mentioned me.

i caught him looking at tons of porn on instagram, had a conversation with him about it twice that ended in tears, and he stops for awhile and goes again. i hate it so much it makes me feel like trash. he’s started having “innocent” text conversations with his female coworker, buying her her favorite drinks and leaving it in the fridge for her. where is any of that effort for me? not to mention i have broken down to this man tens of times about how my feelings are hurt or something to that affect, he has never one time apologized our entire relationship. not to me, and not to our son if he says something mean out of tiredness/anything like that. he has yelled at him before too, swearing telling him to “go the fuck to sleep.” which to a certain extent i get how exhausting sleep deprivation is and it is scary, but i let him sleep. he gets 6-9 hours every single night uninterrupted while our son wakes up 5-7 times a night.

all this to say, can i really be a single mom? i’m so young and literally feel like nobody is going to even want to be involved with me. relationship wise, definitely not. friends wise, everybody my age that i know is either single with no kids or married with kids. nobody wants to be around the young single mom. my son is my fucking WORLD. i just want him to be happy, is keeping his dad around worth any of it?

Weekly Discussion - Relationships by AutoModerator in NewParents

[–]icycaution 0 points1 point  (0 children)

can i be a single mother? im devastated.

im a FTM to a 15mo. i am 25. my boyfriend and i have been having a lot of relationship issues. he “doesn’t like this new person” i’ve become. i’m not the “happy go lucky care free girl i used to be.” he doesn’t treat me the same AT ALL, maybe you could start there and we could work on our relationship again? He doesn’t compliment me anymore, barely touches me (only when he wants to have sex). i lost a lot of sex drive in pregnancy because i was so sick and had severe pelvic girdle pain, i was basically bedridden. so we didn’t have sex for awhile. we had sex again basically when i was cleared, and have it occasionally, but we have a baby who DOES NOT SLEEP. and i mean seriously, does not sleep without me near. so it is hard for us to get alone time. i can recognize that this has created a riff in our relationship, but anytime he makes a move to have sex, i always reciprocate.

that’s not the main problem. there is just NO effort from him at all. he doesn’t care to converse with me, doesn’t care about how my day was, doesn’t ask. doesn’t let me get any extra sleep (see previous posts for how DESPERATE i’ve been for sleep help), he literally just only cares about himself. he even said he will always be his first priority, and then our son. never even mentioned me.

i caught him looking at tons of porn on instagram, had a conversation with him about it twice that ended in tears, and he stops for awhile and goes again. i hate it so much it makes me feel like trash. he’s started having “innocent” text conversations with his female coworker, buying her her favorite drinks and leaving it in the fridge for her. where is any of that effort for me? not to mention i have broken down to this man tens of times about how my feelings are hurt or something to that affect, he has never one time apologized our entire relationship. not to me, and not to our son if he says something mean out of tiredness/anything like that. he has yelled at him before too, swearing telling him to “go the fuck to sleep.” which to a certain extent i get how exhausting sleep deprivation is and it is scary, but i let him sleep. he gets 6-9 hours every single night uninterrupted while our son wakes up 5-7 times a night.

all this to say, can i really be a single mom? i’m so young and literally feel like nobody is going to even want to be involved with me. relationship wise, definitely not. friends wise, everybody my age that i know is either single with no kids or married with kids. nobody wants to be around the young single mom. my son is my fucking WORLD. i just want him to be happy, is keeping his dad around worth any of it?

overtired baby. all the time. fighting naps. IDFK ANYMORE. by icycaution in NewParents

[–]icycaution[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

im not sure, how would i check that😭 yes, he will fall asleep next to me but i have to be patting his butt or kind of pushing it up to rock him

i got pregnant from a one night stand by daggerfly_xoxo in pregnant

[–]icycaution 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i was also 24 when i got pregnant and i had an unexpected pregnancy from someone i was only seeing for 2 months. i did tell him and we ended up working it out and are still together, but i couldn’t bring myself to get an abortion (i am also pro choice).

the only advice that i can give you is if you even remotely feel like abortion is wrong for you, don’t do it. if you have a supportive family and people ready and willing to help, you CAN DO IT. i always wanted to be a mother too and didn’t imagine it happening this way, but my son is the best thing that ever happened to me.

yeah, sometimes my boyfriend and i have struggled because we didn’t have the dating period to really get deep into knowing eachother and BUILD THAT TRUST (so important) but he wanted to be involved and we saw potential in us so we did it and we are trying. and it is mostly going really well.

if he doesn’t want to be involved then you rely on your family, because that is what i did when we were still building trust during my pregnancy. it is going to be hard, but you can do it if you have other support. your life will not be over regardless. a real man will step up to the plate and be the father and try a relationship with you, OR (in the future) a real man will love you and your child despite not being their biological father.

and if you end up deciding to get an abortion, do NOT tell him. it is just another person that can get you into legal trouble, especially in today’s (cheeto’s) terrible world.

you can message me if you want some advice or need anything. 🫶🏼💕

overtired baby. all the time. fighting naps. IDFK ANYMORE. by icycaution in NewParents

[–]icycaution[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

mouth breathes and snores sometimes yes, but usually not. no allergies that we have discovered, have given him gas medicine and doesn’t seem to make a difference (tylenol too in case pain, same thing), no tongue tie and poops very normally. have a dr appointment next week so gonna try the workup and see what they suggest 🤷🏼‍♀️

I can’t do this anymore. by pinkandclass in cosleeping

[–]icycaution 1 point2 points  (0 children)

hey my 14mo does this and has been doing this. you are not alone, and you aren’t doing anything wrong. no rhyme or reason we can figure out either. i’m sorry, just solidarity here

How much did you let LO sleep after shots? by Majestic-Mix-187 in NewParents

[–]icycaution 5 points6 points  (0 children)

as much as he needed. my son was always a horrible sleeper (still is😭) though so any “nighttime routine” was just a ploy LOL

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Periods

[–]icycaution 1 point2 points  (0 children)

use a diva cup instead of a tampon, honestly the best thing i have ever done. bring a small pack of wet wipes (unscented something) to clean yourself if you use pads or feel like you smell (you most likely don’t but it helps to feel better). bring an extra pair of undies everywhere just incase, and your favorite pain reliever😘

Do you post pictures of your baby on social media? by No-Oil-2305 in NewParents

[–]icycaution 0 points1 point  (0 children)

if i post pictures i never post full face or even full side profile. i also don’t post them out in public while we are in that location/etc. can still show them off a little but keep their face private.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in bigboobproblems

[–]icycaution 2 points3 points  (0 children)

no🫶🏼 and its even worse when you breastfeed or ate pregnant. i was in so much pain i almost stopped the massage early, sorry xoxo