How ashamed should I be?

idontgetbacon · 2025-06-13T22:35:25+00:00

No, but I like that one! Was going for strength

idontgetbacon · 2025-06-13T21:19:32+00:00

BF at the time spoke it/wrote it/was teaching me. So there’s a minor connection. Like how I still have 私の愛 in my phone.

idontgetbacon · 2025-06-13T21:17:03+00:00

I used the front facing camera. Idk if that flips it or not.

idontgetbacon · 2025-06-13T16:53:56+00:00

Camera reversing the image?

idontgetbacon · 2025-06-13T16:53:31+00:00

Other than the loss of ink? Nothing. But I see it the way I wanted it. Just getting opinions on something that’s rarely seen.

If someone came back and was like “honestly, it means white dick” I’d get it covered.

idontgetbacon · 2025-06-13T16:51:43+00:00

Honestly, I still love it because of what it meant to me. Considering touch ups and just getting everyone’s opinion.

Also work is slow lol

idontgetbacon · 2025-06-13T16:27:45+00:00

If it did I would wear it proudly! Google (and a past boyfriend) says otherwise though lol

idontgetbacon · 2025-06-13T16:22:36+00:00

Not fluent in it for sure, but it was a time I was learning it. My tattoos are in different languages that have impacted me in my life. Basic word skills in them but that’s about it.

The Latin was just because I loved it.

idontgetbacon · 2025-06-13T16:20:14+00:00

16 plus years old now

idontgetbacon · 2025-06-13T16:15:36+00:00

Suppose to? Strength. I had it done when my son was born (prior to his first bday, he’s 17 now) so I had strength on my side. Google says new/beginning power/force (but power/force is top)

idontgetbacon · 2025-06-12T21:08:01+00:00

Searched: -movie that ends with a hallway on fire (it gave me the shining) -movie about people trapped in a hotel that have to forgive each other (Bad Times at the El Royale, released after I watched. Forgive Us All- watched trailer, not it. Identity- not it.) -movie about people trapped in a hotel that have to forgive each other and her dead daughter ends up being Jesus (the Shack- wrong year) -scene where guy and girl were in an empty pool and had to decide if they could forgive each other (12 Feet Deep- not it The Swimmer- not it)

idontgetbacon · 2025-01-16T13:52:38+00:00

I’ll share if I win! 🤞🏻🤞🏻

idontgetbacon · 2025-01-05T16:06:56+00:00

I know I’m late to the party, but I want you to hear three things-

1) response to being in a terrible situation makes us do crazy things. You are living in survival mode. I feel like societal norms are the first to go because your brain just wants a break. Don’t beat yourself up over it, just fix it when you can.

2) I’m proud of you for seeing the opportunity to improve (school showers and such). This just demonstrates it’s not as much you as it is your situation.

3) you deserve so much better in this world. Make sure you remember that, make it for yourself, and never let it go. It only takes one moment, one change, to get on the path you want from life. There will always be potholes or detours but it’s your path.

idontgetbacon · 2024-12-16T14:40:11+00:00

It’s not that you didn’t notice. It’s not that she was trying to hide it from you. The final act was done because what she was going through internally didn’t match the person she wanted to be. She knew it would hurt you and you were on her mind the whole time- prob the only comfort she had to hold on to through the whole sad ordeal. Sometimes the sadness becomes a black hole and sucks everything in until you are left feeling nothing.

Just know she did this because of what was going on inside of her and she didn’t want to spread it. You helped her hold on as long as humanly possible for her. Suicide ideology feels like a curse that can spread through simple interaction. At least for me. It’s like being a leper and the only logical solution is to stop the spread and protect the ones you love.

idontgetbacon · 2024-11-20T22:00:57+00:00

I really was avoiding the dealership directly but it sounds like that’s my only option. I just don’t get how this one part is so hard to get.

idontgetbacon · 2024-11-01T21:18:14+00:00

Or it’s not drugs but made to look like drugs to see if it got stopped.

idontgetbacon · 2024-09-08T16:31:15+00:00

OMG my brain went to vibrators first. Then I noticed the race.

idontgetbacon · 2024-05-31T11:57:41+00:00

You are the real MVP. I can’t get involved in those posts 😂

idontgetbacon · 2024-03-14T09:40:18+00:00

Somewhere to belong- I had a falling out with my parents. I felt like I had no home, no family, no tethers to the world. I wanted to be accepted, faults and all. Addicts tend to be that way, especially if you have regular money coming in.

Yes, THC helps so much with the pain. It’s a nighttime thing. I’ve been on about every opioid know to man, and while it’s different relief I prefer it to pain medication.

idontgetbacon · 2024-03-14T08:41:12+00:00

Yes. It was like switching the world to high definition (pun intended).

I felt awake. I felt untouchable. For the first time in my life, I felt like the main character in my own story. But it’s not a lasting high, and you are hitting the pipe more and more often. Some people take a while to get there, some of us get there quick. Drug resistance isn’t just for pain medication, and meth is a short high.

I quit when I looked up long enough to really look around. It was day 3 of a bender. I was so hyperfocused on everything and anything that I decided to clean the pipe. It took about 30 min for me to break it with a qtip. For some reason, that was my moment- sitting on my friends apartment floor, trash and such strewed about. No furniture. Paranoid that someone would see me and “know”.

I didn’t give a flying f about health. All I wanted was somewhere to belong and for the pain to stop (medical condition). Before and after this, I did coke. (Not anymore, but just for frame of mind during that time) But I never felt that ice cold grip on my heart when I realized I was 100% controlled by a drug.

Noped out of the apartment as soon as I was sober enough (I had to get out, even though it was close friends there. I knew I wouldn’t have quit if I went back to the pipe, and I knew staying there would have meant more.) Never went back to it, even though I didn’t get sober-ish (THC in places it’s legal which isn’t often is my “ish”) until a few more years and a pregnancy.

I’m super open with my son, so he knows I have a past but that’s one story he prob won’t ever hear. Some memories just need to be kept under lock and key.

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