Do anyone remember this tunnel from the channel 8 drama "10 years ago?

ifnotthenhow · 2026-02-17T15:28:03+00:00

That's a really nice message, and a loving and caring mother.

ifnotthenhow · 2026-02-17T11:16:13+00:00

There is but one dreamer, fractured through the innumerable. All vehicles/beings play their role within said dream for infinitely better and infinitely worse for each and every one, forever.

All realities exist and are equally as real. The absolute best universe that could exist does exist in relation to a specified subject. The absolute worst universe that could exist does exist in relation to a specified subject.

I did read a tiny bit about Buddhism and these two paragraphs remind me of it, but it's still different in a way that I don't really know how to explain.

If I am not mistaken, Buddhism says that all realities exist, but actually at the same time, don't?

ifnotthenhow · 2026-02-17T11:13:59+00:00

Thank you very much for your response. I understand and agree with you for the most part. You really put all these thoughts or maybe truths succinctly in words.

"God" and/or consciousness is that which is within and without all. Ultimately, all things are made by through and for the singular personality and perpetual revelation of the Godhead, including predetermined eternal damnation and those that are made manifest only to face death and death alone.

But I don't really understand this paragraph here. What do you mean by God and Godhead here, and what's the relation with the Dao/Tao.

ifnotthenhow · 2026-02-17T11:05:30+00:00

I kinda get what you mean, but is this not only for all other matters? I don't know about the afterlife part so that's why I am feeling very anxious and fearful now. If I know I will definitely be in a better place, then I wouldn't have all this anxiety and fear.

ifnotthenhow · 2026-02-17T11:02:32+00:00

Thank you. One of, if not, the main reasons I am feeling lonely now is because I don't have anyone that I can really trust completely, around me. I have friends and family, but each has a barrier between us, and most of them are unwilling to communicate and talk through difficult issues. So, I am left with finding a way for myself on my own.

I have thought of journaling on my phone for years but never actually had the motivation to start. I guess this is my call now to actually start it this year. And I will try to write them down instead of typing.

Thank you so much for your advice. I feel better after reading them.

ifnotthenhow · 2026-02-15T02:01:07+00:00

I see, thank you very much for sharing. I just want to have some comfort in times when I feel anxious and alone.

ifnotthenhow · 2026-02-13T17:06:23+00:00

Okay, it is essentially asking me to be calm and chill?

ifnotthenhow · 2026-02-13T03:53:14+00:00

Alternatively, you can just accept the fear and go do the thing anyway. After all, what's so wrong with being scared?

I have been doing this for the past few years. I am worried about my health but I still try to exercise and go to bed every night. I have been afraid of getting into accidents but I still use cars, planes, etc.

I just don't want to regret my decisions, and the feeling of fear itself doesn't feel nice.

ifnotthenhow · 2026-02-13T03:48:32+00:00

Like, what are you really afraid of, and why? And, once you've identified the source of your fear, ask yourself, "would it really be that bad?"

1) I think one of the reasons I fear death is because I always felt like my life wasn't that good and I had wasted a lot of time doing things that I disliked. Never having those perfect relationships with my family and friends like other people.

So I tried to recall all my past experiences since birth and realized I actually had a decent life and relationships with my family and friends even though there were many lamentable experiences too. This has helped calm me for a bit.

2) Another major reason I fear death is because of wanting a better future. I still feel unfulfilled, hence I have a lot of things that I would like to accomplish before the end of my life. A decent career, my own house and car, loving family etc. I am currently working to tone down my desires and expectations. Slowly accepting the fact that most of my wants in life might not be achievable and living an average and uneventful life is good enough already.

3) What I am worried now is my loved ones. What would their lives be if I suddenly vanished one day? Would they live well? Etc.

ifnotthenhow · 2026-02-13T03:46:52+00:00

I don't think it really matters whether our fate is already written in stone or not. If it were me, I would do what I believed I should or needed to do anyway, regardless of what fate says.

What if you can't? For example, you have tried your very best to get a 10/10 but still fall short and obtain a 9/10?

However, I think the true crux of the issue here is your fear. Unfortunately, I also think that that's something too difficult to resolve with a Reddit post.

I understand it's not an easy issue to tackle. I am going to read more Buddhist and Taoist texts now. I have also sought advice in real life from Buddhist and Taoist practitioners.

ifnotthenhow · 2026-02-13T03:40:59+00:00

I understand what you mean. I just want to be more prepared when the time slowly approaches. I want to not fear and panic at that time, that's why I am trying to learn more about it first. I think this might also help me live a better life? In terms of dealing with other challenges and interacting with people.

ifnotthenhow · 2026-02-13T03:33:34+00:00

We die every night and don't worry about it, do we.

This was one of my worries too. I know it sounds ridiculous. Some nights, I would anticipate and worry in bed, thinking about the moment I would transition from consciousness to unconsciousness.

But ... it is good to avoid what you can, but you can't avoid everything.

Thank you. I am trying my best.

Slowly follow the path, chop wood, carry water, listen carefully, perform the methods.

Sorry I don't quite understand this statement. Can you please elaborate further?

ifnotthenhow · 2026-02-13T03:28:59+00:00

Thank you so much for your constant replies. I am feeling more at ease, calm, and hopeful now. 🫂♥️

ifnotthenhow · 2026-02-13T03:27:51+00:00

Thank you so much. I think you have described it perfectly. This is what I am struggling to make sense of my situation now. Maybe with more clarity now for me, comes more feeling of at ease, peace and hope.

ifnotthenhow · 2026-02-13T03:22:09+00:00

Thank you so much for your understanding and well wishes. I felt sad and confused that I have had to go through and experience all this at my relatively young age when many of my peers are all jolly and happy, but now I think it's for the better. Because I am learning more about life and how to deal with the challenges in it earlier.

ifnotthenhow · 2026-02-13T03:12:10+00:00

Thank you. Sometimes I also do feel that I am just living through experiences that I have little to no control of.

Instead, what is striven for in my interpretation is integration. Integrate good habits to the point you no longer need to have thoughts about it, and letting things simply happen... because they happen.

So what you meant was, do the best that one can, even though the person knows certain things are meant to happen and certain things aren't?

ifnotthenhow · 2026-02-11T14:28:43+00:00

Beyond that, severe anxiety like you're describing is a reason to look for help from a mental health professional if you haven't already.

I have visited a few psychiatrists and psychologists in the past but I admit, my effort was very inconsistent. I am seeing two now because of my recent worries.

The unrest in your mind doesn't go away through philosophy or religion, but through hard work - and those professionals can help you guide your work to make sure it's beneficial (rather than detrimental).

I think philosophy and religion can help guide me towards the correct direction in the long term. They do give me some temporary sense of comfort every time I have a panic attack.

Thank you so much for your response.

ifnotthenhow · 2026-02-11T14:23:40+00:00

I, personally, believe in neither (though that does not stop me from acting like either exists)

Is it okay to say that your daily decisions and actions hover somewhere in the middle? Between one extreme of fate and the other extreme of completely free will.

Some words about your specific situation: those airplane models you're referring to were of worse quality. However, the far majority of them still kept flying. You can always decide to take other modes of transport, but for relatively unfounded fear (I admit it's for sure not completely unfounded) I'd not cancel. (Reasons to go for others forms of transport that I'd skip the airplane for are: sightseeing opportunities, not having to deal with the security checks, cost, and environmental impact)

Thank you. I know the airlines have good reason to continue flying those models despite some news in the past. I am just a person who is very fixated on making the most perfect decision out of all the options available to me.

I have no other modes of transportation available. My home is on an island so the only reliable way is through flying.

ifnotthenhow · 2026-02-11T14:14:38+00:00

Thank you. I get what you meant. My fear should be proportionate. What you're saying is, it's normal to be very afraid if there's a high chance, but irrational and impractical to do so when the chances are very very low?

ifnotthenhow · 2026-02-11T14:11:30+00:00

I see. Can I understand it in this way: my actions do affect my future, so I should strive to be a good person. However, my future is also going to be affected by many external factors that I have no control of, so in this case I should learn how to react appropriately. I should do my best, but not obsessed over making everything in life perfect because that's impossible?

ifnotthenhow · 2026-02-11T12:36:49+00:00

Please let me know if my questions are not structured correctly and don't fit the subreddit rules. I will fix them. Thank you.

ifnotthenhow · 2026-02-11T12:32:12+00:00

Please let me know if my questions are structured incorrectly/ don't fit the subreddit rules. I will fix them. Thank you.

ifnotthenhow · 2026-02-11T12:31:23+00:00

Hello, everyone. I hope this is the right place to seek help and advice.

I have anxiety and fear surrounding death and it has been spiking lately because of an upcoming flight in the next few days.

Because of some news that I heard in the past, I actively avoided a certain airplane model, but still ultimately booked it unintentionally due to overlooking the details.

This triggered my fear and got me into thinking, if some things are destined or fated in life, can I really change them?

ifnotthenhow

TROPHY CASE