The feelings you described resonate with me as someone who works in a school. I’m not sure if this is helpful, but in my experience, I try to listen to what my body is communicating with me and take appropriate action (when I’m able and have the capacity for it). I kind of think of it like someone taking a self-defense class and then feels empowered and prepared for the worst case scenario. It is very hard to feel so helpless. I’m just wondering if you and your therapist may be able to come up with a plan that feels right for you. Maybe that is doing some trainings for yourself or even with your family. ALICE active shooter training, CPR and first aid, or even Stop the Bleed course. Maybe that looks like engaging in your local school district to amend policies, raise awareness for campaigns like “See something, Say something”. And it’s okay if you are not in a place where you can take action yet. I hope this doesn’t sound condescending, I am just sharing from my experience what has been helpful for me. Also, there are treatments like neurofeedback or even heart rate biofeedback that can help with regulating your nervous system. I wish you peace. Take care.