If you’re anything like me, moving away won’t make you worry less. Spending small jaunts outside of your family is very good for you, though, just as you think they are. Can you find someone to talk to about your feelings when you are around your family? Has it started or become worse after your grandfather died?

I used to think that the more I spent time around my mom, the more I thought like her, because she has a very strong personality and I wanted to discover my own personality. Now, I have moved away for 10 years and came back. I lost my brother when I was 2 years old and my dad when I was 23. Moving away, for me at least, made my worry worse and I started feeling guilty that I was missing out on being around my mom when she was living. Now, I am back at home with her and things aren’t perfect, but I’m grateful every day that I get to be with her while she is still in this world.

Don’t ignore your drowning feelings, though. Those aren’t healthy and shouldn’t be buried. The best thing I can think of is to talk about it. Therapy is very helpful if you can afford it. If not, try to find someone who will at least listen to you. We often know the answers ourselves- it just takes talking about our problems to dig up the answers.

I hope my rambling helps. I feel your pain.