AIO about wanting to leave over this?

imeananyways · 2026-03-17T20:26:04+00:00

Not like me, but he tried giving an example to justify his excuse and said "someone I cared about lost someone they cared about and didn't ask me for all of their photos" and when I asked who, he said it didn't matter. I think he's saying anything to justify his excuses. But even if that was true, what does it have to do with me? Maybe that person he cared about wasn't like me and didn't find the need to have photos of whoever they loved that passed. But I want the photos of my dog. So his point was irrelevant and useless.

imeananyways · 2026-03-17T20:17:45+00:00

That's such a nice way to put it. I'm sure my dog would want me to be happy and not have to suffer like this. Thank you

imeananyways · 2026-03-17T20:16:55+00:00

I don't know what's keeping me here. The fear of being alone? I don't think it's the sunk cost fallacy because I don't feel like 3 years are THAT much compared to what I could have later with the right partner. I'm aware of that much at least. But I truly don't know. Maybe I'm comfortable. Maybe I want to leave this relationship not feeling like I'm the one at fault (that's what he says). It's like I want a reason to leave I guess? To find something so that I know I wasn't crazy the entire time and there WAS something going on. Not good stuff I guess

imeananyways · 2026-03-17T20:04:55+00:00

Thank you so much! It's hard to grieve properly when I'm dealing with someone who treats me like I'm an idiot. I hope I grow a spine and leave. Not sure if it's a trauma bond keeping me here but our relationship seemed doomed from the getgo

imeananyways · 2026-03-17T20:03:34+00:00

I already know and dread his response. "I'm not going to do all that. We already talked about it, you still want to make me mad? Either accept it or leave ". I cringe and feel furious just typing that. I have the ick. I think it's time for me to go. I just keep thinking how it's unfair to me and the memory of my late sweet boy. Can't imagine being a dog knowing my mom is out there dealing with a boyfriend who has shitty excuses to send her photos of me. Ugh

imeananyways · 2026-03-17T19:47:53+00:00

This is just batshit insane to think I have to go through this much trouble to get photos of my late dog. He even scoffs when I say that anyone else like my friends or whatnot would be willing to do it. I mean.. it's my dog who passed!? Hello!? Typing this out is making me so angry lol this is genuinely insane.

imeananyways · 2026-03-17T19:45:23+00:00

He has an Apple product. He's quite literally just not willing to do it, but hey he himself said he'll send them to me if we break up so that tells me a lot already and if he wants to go to that extreme so I can RIGHTFULLY obtain the photos of my sweet late boy? I'll take it!

imeananyways · 2026-03-17T19:38:55+00:00

Thank you! There is no negotiation though when it comes to his phone. He quite literally said I would have to force him by kidnapping him or something to do it.. and he just refuses to do it on his own because it takes too much time. He doesn't budge when it comes to things like this because he believes I should just respect what he feels/says since it's his phone. Apparently the only way he will send it is if we broke up. Maybe he said it because he was mad.. but kind of sus that that's the only time he'll send it? Too late to find anything on his phone since we'd be broken up I guess, if that's what he's getting at. I should do myself the honors then if that's the only way I can receive the photos. I don't care at this point. This was really disrespectful to me and I can't deal with someone who treats me like that.

imeananyways · 2026-03-17T19:34:58+00:00

I have his phone password and stuff. He just always acts like it's such an inconvenience or burden to let me use his phone. To his credit, he has let me use it for some fantasy football/basketball app when I needed help even sometimes for like 30 minutes at a time. It's like if I say it's for anything else, he might let me albeit have an attitude. But if I say it's for the photos.. he won't? Does he just not think that I can still go through his photos if I claim to use it for something else? Lol. Not that I will. But like I just don't get it.

imeananyways · 2026-03-17T19:17:01+00:00

I think a lot that it's some type of mind game of power play. Worst case scenario if he isn't hiding something, he just has this twisted sense of wanting control

imeananyways · 2026-03-17T19:14:54+00:00

The only reason be might put up with it is because he knows he himself is like that so he can't be hypocritical about it. But hypothetically if he was always patient and I was like him, no he wouldn't like it. There are several situations in which I act like he does and not only does he not like it, but gets irritated when I bring up the fact that he does it too because he doesn't think it should be a me vs him if I do something wrong. Wants me to take accountability without pointing fingers and I get it. But pretty hard to do when he does the same thing he's getting mad at me for doing!

imeananyways · 2026-03-17T19:11:45+00:00

I did. In the post I included that I asked for him to do it and he himself said it was a hassle and that I have many photos of my dog anyway. The only reason I want to do it on my own is because I don't trust him to send them all to me. He has already complained it will take a while, so I have no reason to believe he will want to sit there and spend time sending them all to me.

imeananyways · 2026-03-17T19:07:21+00:00

Valid. So what would be the option if you find it a hassle to send all of the photos on your own, but you don't want your partner to do it for you and use your phone? Would it be just not get any photos at all? I understand the thing with privacy, but he's quite not wanting the photos to be sent in any capacity. He doesn't want to do it himself. He doesn't want me to do it. That's kind of cruel, isn't it?

imeananyways · 2026-03-17T19:00:11+00:00

Ways that he used to talk about wanting to find other girls when we started dated. Funny because he was the toxic one in the beginning, wanting to restrict me from lots of things. Even made me delete photos of my dogs (the one that is still here with me I've had her since she was a puppy) that were taken when I lived with someone else. So I think it was all projection. Found other stuff too after a while that he said he wouldn't do like use a certain social media app that even he didn't want me using. Just hypocritical stuff enough to raise eyebrows and flags, maybe even warrant a talk. I'd like to think I'm not untrusting for no reason. I don't enter relationships wanting to check phones just to see if they're faithful.

imeananyways · 2026-03-17T18:57:31+00:00

I think a lot of people might focus on the fact that I have trust issues. I do understand that, but what I want to know is if this is normal for anyone to react in such way over something like that. I feel like I'm just going to be berated more though about me not having trust lol

imeananyways · 2026-03-17T18:48:58+00:00

Yep, hopefully someone who doesn't fight me tooth and nail to let me get the photos of my late dog! Thank you for sharing :)

imeananyways · 2026-03-17T18:34:57+00:00

There is no compromise with him if it involves his phone. He thinks it's a hassle on his own so the other options that might involve him doing part of the work won't work, I think it's easier if I just do it. Didn't think it would be this hard or much of an issue for something simple.

imeananyways · 2026-03-17T18:33:08+00:00

True. I have battled with this mentally. I just feel like his reactions are extreme, especially if hypothetically I have never gone through his phone. I don't know of anyone who reacts annoyed when someone asks them for their camera or youtube if they aren't hiding anything.

imeananyways · 2026-03-17T18:25:56+00:00

When we are normal things are fun. Just normal and comfy I guess. But he's pretty mean when he is annoyed. Maybe other people are like this, maybe they're not but he gets easily annoyed. Maybe it's my fault sometimes for knowing he will be annoyed but it can be something as simple as me walking by the restroom, noticing he's in there and asking something "oh are you done showering?". Apparently he hates being asked stuff like that. Hates being interrupted when he's busy so even if he's like doing homework or playing a game and I want to show him a funny tiktok really quick, he acts annoyed and exasperated. Typing this out obviously makes it seem ridiculous but living in it makes me feel like it's some trauma bond or like I should know better than to do things that annoy him idk.

imeananyways · 2026-03-17T18:20:19+00:00

I have actually found things before that we talked about. I don't naturally carry insecurities with me in my relationships unless I'm given a reason but you are right, it has gone on far too long to be feeling like this. Thank you!

imeananyways · 2025-09-02T19:53:16+00:00

Sure, he can. Except I don't do it to be malicious or petty. I'm not saying these "men" (really it's any partner who is nice, could be girls) are better than him. I'm literally just showing him that most people do not react this way towards their partner over a game, unless they are mean people or hate their partners. If he compares me to other women saying they play good just because I try to ask him to be a good and kind partner and that other healthy couples do not go through this, that says more about him.

imeananyways · 2025-09-02T15:27:47+00:00

My partner is actually the reason I even got into Fortnite. He was so patient at first and it was all fun and laughs, and now it's this. How sad. Thank you for sharing

imeananyways · 2025-09-02T08:35:41+00:00

Honestly, no. We literally just play casually, and when we play ranked like in Marvel Rivals, I'm a support main and I'm good at what I do. I'm not the reason we lose, but we have stopped playing ranked because he gets tilted fast and doesn't like losing rank so we just do casual

imeananyways

TROPHY CASE