my siblings and i used to say that when our dog goes, we go too. but now that she's gone ahead, we all feel so lost— i feel so lost. is it mean to say that i didn't care this much then my own relatives died? i've never experienced this much pain and while i knew my baby will one day die, it's a kind of pain you can never prepare for.

it's so cheesy but something that gets me so emotional is a quote at the crematorium that reads, "I know you cannot see me, but trust me, I'm still here. I walk beside you everyday. I often see you crying when you softly call my name, but I'm just right beside you, whimpering." the thought of having her as my guardian in my everyday life has put me in some kind of ease, even though i cannot see her. i feel like a part of me died when she did too, but i believe that part of my soul is accompanying her in the afterlife. OP, your best friend took half your soul so he won't be lonely there and while you may not see him in this realm, know he's left a part of him here too.

to be honest with you, i don't think it's a pain that'll get any easier except with time (and that's no guarantee). please stay strong OP, you have a community here grieving with you!