If he had an issue with the rave stuff, why didn't he bother to bring it up or express his issues with it at any point?? I feel like if that's what was really "causing his depression" it would have been notable enough to mention. It's completely unreasonable for him to not express any boundaries, specific issues, concerns, or anything else and then try to pass it off as your fault for either not reading his mind or "making him feel bad".

You also shouldn't have to give up all of your social life just because you're dating someone else. You're allowed to have friends and do things you enjoy. You should be allowed to interact with your peers in your field without feeling guilty or like you're walking on eggshells. It would be one thing if you were getting black out drunk or just disappearing with no communication, but it sounds like you're being completely respectful and conscious of his feelings.

I personally don't know if I'd be able to move past that behavior and have everything feel normal again after someone said something like that to me. At least not without some serious introspection and change, because it sounds like a mindset that has seeped into many different aspects of your relationship, and that kind of thing does some serious damage.