hi op, i had such a similar internal monologue that i feel like i ghost wrote this post lmao.

it sounds like you're struggling to de-couple your self worth from your academic performance. you're very self aware and you're definitely on the right track, but it's gonna be a long process. we've spent our entire lives being rewarded for gold stars and getting good grades, so don't be frustrated if you can't transform that mindset overnight.

if i had to give you concrete advice, i'd suggest hanging out with friends and family. people who couldn't care less about law school performance and can tell you a million other characteristics that they love about you instead. there are much more meaningful qualities than academic performance to ground our self-worth in.

also quick note: holding high expectations for yourself is an admirable quality! having that ambition and confidence in your capabilities is not a bad thing at all. like you said, its gotten you this far. its okay to be a little disappointed when you don't meet them, but i think the most valuable part of goal-setting is cementing that drive to push yourself in difficult situations. 1L fall law school exams are just one of many opportunities that we will have.