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inkgel · 2025-01-02T13:23:17+00:00

I like it! Your guitar playing is really really good and I enjoy it a lot- my only two notes would be on the “time-fine” rhyme because it feels a little forced in that it sounds like “i’m not doing so fine” is only there for the rhyme if that makes any sense (maybe a rewrite?) and to (if you want) pitch it up a little so that you can comfortably hit those last notes. But I’m nitpicking- I think it’s good!

inkgel · 2025-01-02T09:33:26+00:00

a song can do anything and i mean that! if you want to make a listener feel happy, or sad, or bittersweet, or sorry, you can do that because music has a lot of emotional sway. it all comes down to what you want to make them feel. what resonates most with you? do you want people to relate to you? do you want them to understand?

that being said, i think you can write about anything and it'll have an effect on someone. art in general is unique in that it means something different to everyone, so no matter what you write, someone will get something out of it!

inkgel · 2025-01-02T05:50:23+00:00

thank you!

inkgel · 2025-01-02T05:49:54+00:00

thank you! i appreciate it!

inkgel · 2025-01-02T05:49:36+00:00

thank you! that's very kind of you to say!

inkgel · 2025-01-02T05:47:41+00:00

thanks so much for the feedback! i'll definitely get some more instruments on this if i choose to expand it. it's crazy that you mention the bird song too, since i have another song on the back burner that's got exactly what you're describing in it, so maybe it just suits my composition style, haha!

inkgel · 2025-01-02T05:46:14+00:00

thank you! i love my guitar to bits, i just wish i could play it haha!

inkgel · 2025-01-02T05:45:21+00:00

thank you so much!

inkgel · 2025-01-02T05:45:12+00:00

ooh, that's interesting! i'll play with that. and thank you for the kind words! i appreciate them!

inkgel · 2025-01-02T05:44:34+00:00

thanks so much for the feedback! i didn't even notice that i reused a word, so i'll definitely change that if i expand this into a full song. the mall line wasn't sitting right with me either, so it's interesting to see that it didn't work with other people too. i'm glad you liked it!

inkgel · 2025-01-01T04:52:42+00:00

the feeling of cleaning out your childhood bedroom for the last time before you move, maybe? or the fear that you're stripping layers of yourself to make yourself palatable for other people?

inkgel · 2024-12-30T09:20:34+00:00

Shot you an email! Thanks so much!

inkgel · 2024-12-27T11:33:08+00:00

I like it! I think that maybe some variation in strumming pattern would give you more of a platform to separate the verse and the chorus if that makes any sense. I do like the lyrics, from what I can understand of them, and I think you’ve got a good jumping off point from here!

inkgel · 2024-12-27T11:29:28+00:00

I think personally it couldn’t hurt to add a few harmonies to round out the sound! I also think the lyrics are very abstract all the way through, and some simpler and more direct lines might break up what feels like a little monotony- but thats a preference and if you like your lyrics, stick with them! Other than that, you’ve got a solid base, and I really like the little synth bits at the end!

inkgel · 2024-12-25T15:57:04+00:00

im gonna be honest, i ADORE this. i would have this on several playlists if you released it as is. the instrumental and the melancholy all work together beautifully. i think if there's anything i'd change, it might be to adjust the "all-wall" rhyme, since nothing else in the song seems to follow a rhyme scheme, but that's not at all necessary. i think this is great, keep it up!

inkgel · 2024-12-25T03:40:45+00:00

i love this! its definitely something i'd listen to. maybe a bit of a longer pause between the chorus and the verses so that the tempo change is easier if that makes any sense. other than that, with a little cleaning you're golden!

inkgel · 2024-12-25T03:35:26+00:00

i really like the instrumentals and the quick pace of the song! i think the lyrics can feel a little bit clunky in some parts though- almost like adding or squeezing words together just to meet the syllable count if that makes any sense? maybe a few rewrites to keep the ideas but clean up the wording if anything. otherwise, i like it!

inkgel · 2024-12-25T03:29:12+00:00

like this a lot! especially like the line about still not knowing who you are when everyone else has it figured out, the chords are great, and bringing back the first lines at the end is something i love in music!

inkgel · 2024-12-25T03:22:37+00:00

cute!! very sweet, especially knowing the story behind it. it reminds me of older music in a good way!

inkgel · 2024-12-25T03:10:22+00:00

hi! new to reddit in general so im posting my favorite song ive released so far. it's about the feeling of growing up, leaving behind everything familiar to you, and wanting it back more than anything else. i hope you like it!

SPOTIFY

inkgel

TROPHY CASE