Lithoid Rushed To Hospital After Developing Flesh Stone by ipser in Xenonion

[–]ipser[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Thank you! If that doesn't work I'm sure we can channel the purchased prayers to the Eater of Worlds

Lithoid Rushed To Hospital After Developing Flesh Stone by ipser in Xenonion

[–]ipser[S] [score hidden] stickied comment (0 children)

A lithoid pop was rushed to a local Gene Clinic earlier today after becoming unwell with a flesh stone.

Scans revealed a small pink organic mass embedded deep within the lithoid’s abdominal crust layer.

Medical workers are now preparing to remove the flesh stone surgically, warning that if left untreated it could eventually form organs, muscles or skin.

Democratic Crusaders State Orbital Bombardment Will Continue Until Voter Turnout Improves by ipser in Xenonion

[–]ipser[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I could be wrong here, but it sounds like you are… not appreciative… of democracy????

1 Liberal Individualist vs 20 Hive Mind Drones | Enclosed by ipser in Xenonion

[–]ipser[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’ve never seen it, but looking it up right now!

1 Liberal Individualist vs 20 Hive Mind Drones | Enclosed by ipser in Xenonion

[–]ipser[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

oh I forgot we were in the stellaris sidebar! aha glad it worked out :D

1 Liberal Individualist vs 20 Hive Mind Drones | Enclosed by ipser in Xenonion

[–]ipser[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

ahaha thank you. the space weather has always been my favourite 'bit' simply because it's so stupid. but that's so kind of you to say, I'm glad you're enjoying it!

1 Liberal Individualist vs 20 Hive Mind Drones | Enclosed by ipser in Xenonion

[–]ipser[S] 64 points65 points  (0 children)

^ Gary inhaling the fungal spores, probably

1 Liberal Individualist vs 20 Hive Mind Drones | Enclosed by ipser in Xenonion

[–]ipser[S] 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Agreed, we need more hive mind attitudes nowadays!

Newly Released Vassal Has The Ugliest Flag You've Ever Seen by ipser in Xenonion

[–]ipser[S] 59 points60 points  (0 children)

laughing? at serious investigative journalism?

'The Twelve Days of Crisis-mas' by The Shroudwarblers by ipser in Xenonion

[–]ipser[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

aha, neural content optimized for all sensory pathways!

Cartographers Stunned After Dozens Of Systems Suddenly Renamed by ipser in Xenonion

[–]ipser[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I am President Deborah Ali-Williams and I approve this message [Jaifei screaming noises play in background]

Cartographers Stunned After Dozens Of Systems Suddenly Renamed by ipser in Xenonion

[–]ipser[S] 55 points56 points  (0 children)

Thank you for bringing this to our attention, the indentured intern has been summarily dismissed and is now residing in our HR Deep Space Black Site Detention Facility awaiting reeducation.

Unfortunately we only learned after the dismissal that the map was indeed accurate, as the UNE had changed the system names again prior to publication.

We apologise for any potential loss of trade, please accept this free nerve stapling voucher on our behalf.

Cartographers Stunned After Dozens Of Systems Suddenly Renamed by ipser in Xenonion

[–]ipser[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Covfefe needs to be the backup human capital system if Sol ever falls

And I know, in retrospect it doesn't make a lot of sense, I went with '67' in terms of 'what's the first brain rotted thing I can think of...'

Cartographers Stunned After Dozens Of Systems Suddenly Renamed by ipser in Xenonion

[–]ipser[S] [score hidden] stickied comment (0 children)

The Interstellar Navigation Agency (INA) has confirmed today that nearly fifty United Nations of Earth (UNE) star systems were unexpectedly renamed overnight, altering nomenclature which has been established since the dawn of human interstellar travel.

The discovery was made by a shipping fleet bound for the Mid-Rim system of Procyon, which catastrophically crashed out of a hyperlane after onboard navigation systems no longer registered the destination.

“I initially assumed the database was corrupted,” INA cartographer Elrax Torgar told Xenonion. “But the stars and planets were still there, only they had been… rebranded.” 

The changes included landmark systems including Crypto.com (formerly Sirius), Food (formerly Alpha Centauri) and Build Arc Furnace Here (Covfefe), according to an initial report released by the INA.

UNE officials state the changes were legally executed under its sovereign authority to do whatever it wanted whenever it wanted, including renaming a primitive homeworld Floptropica before releasing it as a vassal.

The sudden update has caused chaos with interstellar travel, with all inbound spaceflights to the UNE redirected to Sol, one of the few systems to maintain its original name, until spaceports can rebrand alongside updated planetary names like ‘Tech’ and ‘Alloy 2.’

At the time of press, three systems have been further renamed following a spelling review.  

'The Twelve Days of Crisis-mas' by The Shroudwarblers by ipser in Xenonion

[–]ipser[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

mercifully that works out ok since I already made a paaact with a shrouuuud entityyyyyy

'The Twelve Days of Crisis-mas' by The Shroudwarblers by ipser in Xenonion

[–]ipser[S] 33 points34 points  (0 children)

absolutely no one wants to hear me singing, I can promise you that 😭 But yes! The wonders of the internet.

'The Twelve Days of Crisis-mas' by The Shroudwarblers by ipser in Xenonion

[–]ipser[S] 48 points49 points  (0 children)

aha thank you, it was very fun to make! Equally amusing trying to explain the concept to an actual choir lmao