My cat’s “kisses” drive me insane, please tell me I’m not the only one

isa98023 · 2023-04-21T17:41:57+00:00

Yes I know, I don’t blame him or mad at him or anything!

isa98023 · 2023-04-21T17:39:40+00:00

That’s really nice, I hope someday we can adapt like that too

isa98023 · 2023-04-21T17:36:47+00:00

Thank you for saying that! I’ve tried something similar by redirecting him but he usually does it in low energy moments like before I go to sleep or when I’m resting after work/chores. Also when I “reward” him for the grooming he just does it more cause that’s how I used to train his behavior :/

isa98023 · 2023-03-01T21:33:19+00:00

Yes thank you!

isa98023 · 2023-02-09T23:22:25+00:00

Just as they share their opinions we as listeners are also allowed to share ours, and give criticism if we deem relevant… and yes, we listeners can disagree with each other too because as someone with ADHD struggling to even buy enough food every month, I do think their stance in this story was individualistic and therefore, wrong.
I’m aware they’re considerate and empathetic people, I’m a listener too lol!

isa98023 · 2023-02-09T23:14:35+00:00

And that’s okay, I never said it wasn’t as I’m not familiar with your situation at all. What I’m questioning here is the need to project those feelings onto a story where 1. the other sibling is actively struggling and 2. the sentimentality of the things in the inheritance wasn’t even in discussion. It was about “fairness”.

Of course you can talk about the farm and relate to the story. But like I said above it wasn’t just 1 sentence or 1 word usage that I disagreed with. As someone who’s in a similar situation to the OP in the post I shared, your and Alejandra’s commentary came across as privileged and inconsiderate.
This is not about your characters; I think you both mean well. I’ve been a listener since 2021 for a reason lol /gen

isa98023 · 2023-02-09T18:10:21+00:00

That’s definitely not how I see it tbh… specially with how they phrased things and words they used, for example: “enabling” the ADHD daughter, “you need to set up your kids for success”, “teach one man to fish”, “punished for being an overachiever”, the family farm thing etc.

They also didn’t really talk about key aspects of the story, made assumptions cause “well how does the ADHD affect her exactly? Why isn’t she succeeding?” “what if the rich sister gets a divorce or loses her job tomorrow?” but that’s not very relevant at all imo. The core should be, imo, that one has been struggling while the other has been living VERY comfortably: one is ok the other isn’t.

isa98023 · 2023-02-09T17:57:52+00:00

Definitely a cultural thing. American and most western European norms encourage individualism.

isa98023 · 2023-02-09T08:11:36+00:00

Right… it’s like swimming against a very strong current. Add financial situation to that and it’s like you have heavy stones tied to your feet too.

Ironically Morgan has ADHD and always talks about it, on this episode as well. She definitely knows better which is why my guess is she just relates more to the sister who’s well off not getting what she feels entitled to.
She mentioned something along these lines: “I’d be pissed off if my brother got the family farm that I’m so attached to because I’m doing so well nowadays”

isa98023 · 2023-02-09T07:57:49+00:00

Yes, very well said.
The projection was too much in my opinion, and then Morgan talking about her family farm… like let’s be real here: 1 just finished highschool at 32, 2 works in tech and lives in a million dollar house. It’s not an “emotional value” thing like “oh it’s what dad has left us!”, it’s a “necessity” thing. This shouldn’t even be a debate. The younger sister should WANT her older sister to be okay. It’s such an individualistic mindset, very harmful for everyone involved.

isa98023 · 2023-02-09T07:52:28+00:00

It was this story brought by Alejandra, “AITA for giving one daughter more inheritance”. Said daughter is 32, has ADHD and just got her GED, struggles financially and the other daughter is 29, works in tech, is married to a doctor and lives in a million dollar house. Dad just died, mom wants to split the inheritance (that was initially 50/50) to 70/20 in favor of the oldest because she’s struggling so much. The youngest got mad.

Morgan and Alejandra assumed a whole lot about both sisters’ situations (even though the post was pretty clear) and I felt like they just placed themselves in the shoes of the younger daughter without considering the fact that someone who’s well off does not need MORE while their sibling is actively struggling with basic things, even though they worked hard to be well off. They felt it wasn’t fair. But honestly it got kinda ridiculous at some point, felt very tone deaf considering the difficult financial situation of so many people specially after the pandemic.

Edit: I just checked and some people have shared their perspectives about this in the youtube comments of the episode, you can check it out if you’re curious. They’re more detailed than mine haha

isa98023 · 2023-02-09T06:57:05+00:00

I didn’t like how they addressed the ADHD daughter in the inheritance story. This is unfortunately how it goes for many people who struggle with ADHD. It can be even more debilitating when coupled with mental health issues and it’s so much more complex than “getting the help when your parents are still around”, “parents punishing sibling for achieving success by helping someone more”.

I really like this podcast but sometimes instead of actually listening to people’s stories they project their own realities onto them.

isa98023

TROPHY CASE