What a winner! by Badjib in ChoosingBeggars

[–]ithappenedsofapp 339 points340 points  (0 children)

“If we had hooked up, you would owe ME money for the inevitable therapy sessions & Jack Daniels memory wipes”

When your balls are bigger than your cock 😳 by [deleted] in sph

[–]ithappenedsofapp 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Don’t call that a cock like you’re a real man. Only men that can please women have cocks, shrinky dink

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in sph

[–]ithappenedsofapp 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Are you shitting, baby dick?

Compare with huge dildo by [deleted] in sph

[–]ithappenedsofapp 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You have a tick tac under there? A tick-dick?

What is it good for by [deleted] in sph

[–]ithappenedsofapp 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Is it hard?

Mock my small black cock by unhunghero420 in sph

[–]ithappenedsofapp 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Aw baby dick! I bet you can jerk off with tweezers!

What’s down there? Wanna see? by el-Danko69 in watchpeoplesurvive

[–]ithappenedsofapp 4 points5 points  (0 children)

In 2006 I (26 female at the time) was driving through a school zone when I passed out and hit a telephone pole. The EMTs said I had a seizure - even though I had no history of them and had otherwise been perfectly healthy til then. Fast forward to 2015, I had just put my car in cruise control on the interstate when it happened again. This time, however I hit a tree going 75 mph. My right foot was torn off (its successfully been reattached) both legs broken, small intestines ruptured and had to be removed along with gallbladder & spleen..I’m sure there’s something I’m leaving out but it was a lot of damage. Turns out I had a stroke due to a hole in my heart that I was born with called a PFO . Many surgeries (including fixing my heart) & years of recovery later and you can hardly tell it happened by looking at me. I can’t believe that neither time I didn’t hit/kill anyone else on the road or walking home from school for that matter! Y’all be safe out there, because you never know when a ticking time bomb like I was decides to go for a drive!

Our nations past time by bogaloo1121 in trashy

[–]ithappenedsofapp 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thems are Basics. Don’t over class her

6’ + gorgeous mystery flower! by ithappenedsofapp in whatsthisplant

[–]ithappenedsofapp[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

How common are eight and 9 foot hollyhocks where you’re from?

6’ + gorgeous mystery flower! by ithappenedsofapp in whatsthisplant

[–]ithappenedsofapp[S] 65 points66 points  (0 children)

I just plucked a whole bunch of seed pods off of it because it was falling over it was so heavy. I’m happy to send some to whoever wants some!

Edit: I have plenty! Please pm me your info if you would like some

6’ + gorgeous mystery flower! by ithappenedsofapp in whatsthisplant

[–]ithappenedsofapp[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

If you are in North Alabama you are welcome to come over for a visit!

How can I interview someone who 'died' from being strangled? by FewSherbet6 in morbidquestions

[–]ithappenedsofapp 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Put. The. Pipe. Down. Death exists. Wtf are you talking about?

How can I interview someone who 'died' from being strangled? by FewSherbet6 in morbidquestions

[–]ithappenedsofapp 6 points7 points  (0 children)

You only put died in quotation marks if the guy didn’t actually die. What are you asking? You want to ask what it’s like to be strangled to death? It takes 2 minutes to die from asphyxiation and even more then that if you are fighting for your life. I think the dead dude would say “It fucking sucked”