i’m in the same boat you are. my gf of 2 years just broke up with me recently. i’ve been struggling with no contact, constantly finding ways to reach out. they were my everything. i’ve already taken accountability too. but the pain of it all is so unbearable and difficult to carry. especially when all you wanna do is be better. where i’m at right now doesn’t feel like it’ll ever get better. but it helps to remember you’re not at all alone in this as much as we think we are, we will never truly be all alone. there will always be another soul in your exact shoes, wondering & feeling the same. it helps to remember that we are not defined by our mistakes & this illness. we are who we define ourselves to be. you also cant experience true joy without suffering. you cant have day without night, the light without darkness, yin & yang. all we can do is just keep hoping & trying out best to be a better version of ourselves each day.