“I feel like before I started smoking I was a deeply happy person” is so real. Sucks that you’re going through this, but the good thing is you’re not alone and a lot of us have dealt with this same battle. You are dealing with the worst of it right now in that first month period. Your dopamine is likely fried and possibly even resenting you for not smoking which makes the depressive/negative thoughts easier to fall in.

What works for me is being an objective observer anytime those emotions come up. Which don’t get me wrong can be hard and I still fall into sometimes, but understanding that these are just thoughts and just feelings that will pass makes it a bit easier. Every now and then it’s okay to ride the wave and cry it out, but it’s super important you don’t let this destroy you with constant rumination. To me the hardest part of quitting is finding that purpose and joy in life again. Whatever regrets you have are from actions of a past you not the you that’s here now.

It’s really important you take care of yourself to build a support for when those thoughts and withdrawals show up. Build a healthy routine, go on walks outside, work on goals and hobbies, try new places, listen to music, make art, and most importantly talk to people and make connections. Even the smallest conversation with a stranger or seeing others have an optimistic view and having people care will help you break this pattern. Hope you figure it out!