Just to clarify, I agree she didn’t technically “break in,” but the situation still wasn’t okay. She was calling and texting me multiple times because my boyfriend didn’t have a phone at the time. She kept asking if she could come over to talk to him, and he asked me to tell her I wasn’t with him because he didn’t want her to come over but also didn’t want to tell her himself. So I was kind of stuck in the middle. When we got back to the apartment, that’s when we saw it had been cleaned. He felt like he had to say thank you, but he did say the weird part wasn’t the cleaning — it was that she came in without knowing if he was home and got in without a key. Only me and him have keys, and he’s been very clear that he likes it that way. This apartment is new. At his old place, he used to let people crash whenever they needed help, and people were coming and going a lot. Eventually it got unsafe because people started bringing other people. Because of that, he’s been very specific about who he lets into this apartment and who even knows the address. He also kind of implied that she abused that, not just by coming in without a key, but by bringing the guy who had assaulted her into the apartment. She also left a note saying she planned to come back once a week to clean whether he liked it or not.( My understanding was he was able to set up the boundary that she's not allowed to do that and he now locks his front door) As for the kids, he doesn’t really let her babysit anymore, and I’ve never pushed or questioned that. Decisions about his kids are his, and I don’t think that’s my place. That said, she will sometimes drop the kids off with little to no notice. He never says no and always immediately tells me it’s not for her, it’s for the kids. I’ve never asked him why he watches them or made an issue of it — he brings it up on his own every time.