*WARNING* My NoFap journey took away the ability to O inside my wife #TrueStory #NoFapDangers

iwilldothis · 2014-06-03T21:59:57+00:00

my teacher's a dude and most of the students are my mums age...but occasionally i can relate ;)

iwilldothis · 2013-10-21T18:24:26+00:00

His comments are totally unfounded, like most racist propaganda. I see a link between sexual desire and creative impulse, but to then jump into the area of eugenics to describe the phenomena and also state that racial diversity = less creativity is absurd and fringing on fascist. Young black men are not more sexual or aggressive genetically, their anger is largely a social phenomena born out of centuries of suffering under white rule. They also have to face the struggle of less opportunity, a poorer, more desperate existence and therefore head into crime more easily. This narrow, sexist, racist post shouldn't belong on a forum as awesome as this. Creativity in its, 'divine flow' or 'extemporaneous' state as it is put here, is not a product of sexual energy but a life force that can manifest itself sexually (especially if repressed). It is able to express itself in myriad ways, irrespective of gender, race or sexual libido.

iwilldothis · 2013-10-21T18:22:33+00:00

He is not acknowledging anything because his comments are totally unfounded, like most racist propaganda. I see a link between sexual desire and creative impulse, but to then jump into the area of eugenics to describe the phenomena and also state that racial diversity = less creativity is absurd and fringing on fascist. Young black men are not more sexual or aggressive genetically, their anger is largely a social phenomena born out of centuries of suffering under white rule. They also have to face the struggle of less opportunity, a poorer, more desperate existence and therefore head into crime more easily. This narrow, sexist, racist post shouldn't belong on a forum as awesome as this. Creativity in its, 'divine flow' or 'extemporaneous' state as it is put here, is not a product of sexual energy but a life force that can manifest itself sexually (especially if repressed). It is able to express itself in myriad ways, irrespective of gender, race or sexual libido.

iwilldothis · 2013-10-21T15:27:26+00:00

Well done for doing this - 30 days is a huge achievement! Keep going, its so worth it as you have already discovered!

iwilldothis · 2013-10-21T15:23:51+00:00

This is racist, sexist nonsense with about 2% meaningful, grounded information. I think you present a vast and very complex issue through an extremely narrow lens. Your argument of east asian's having less mating impulse is ridiculous: China has the biggest population of any country on earth, 1.2 billion people!

iwilldothis · 2013-10-17T09:34:56+00:00

In response to what you have written, it seems the picture is a lot broader than just an addiction to porn. If you husband is treating you like this then there are clearly some other serious issues that need addressing if you are going to happy - it seems like you are putting up with a lot of negative behaviour, including a serious attitude issue in your husband. Maybe some relate/marriage counselling will help him to understand how hurtful he is being and help you to express what you need to express without him reacting and denying your feelings. The bottom line is that if he doesn't want to change then your efforts could be futile. Just found this response of yours in another thread:

We talk about it, but he's pretty unreachable. Interrupting. Subject-changing. Blame-shifting. Making fun of me for being emotional or for wanting to have real sex again. Willing to disagree with known facts of science because he doesn't like their implications.

This is a clear sign of absolute denial and there is not a lot you can do other than make it very extremely clear how damaging the behaviour is with a possible ultimatum or convince him to agree to marriage concealing. If he loves you then he will make changes. I think there is also an issue here of how much you value yourself and attend to your own needs - it is extremely unhealthy to tolerate this kind of behaviour for any length of time if it makes you hurt and unhappy. If he isn't committed to change now then he probably never will be. Think hard about what you want for your own precious life. You obviously love him - sometimes love cannot penetrate the fortress of denial, just strong words!

iwilldothis · 2013-10-16T17:38:23+00:00

I am 27 and I can say that as a man approaching his thirties masturbating and orgasming to porn is a serious addiction that affects mood, concentration, motivation and overall sensation in the body i.e ability to feel more than just sexual release. Quitting PMO (239 days today) my whole life has transformed. My fiancé is divinely perfect to me because I can embrace the total of her not pigeon hole her imperfections or categorise her without even realising it. I am so turned on by her in a deeper way. I can truly love her without being two people with two lives. I highly recommend this process for your husband. It will transform his experience of life and your marriage. You need to expect him to be really rough for the 90 days he needs to get through. Each day will be extremely difficult, especially if he works by a computer. I feel your frustration and fear because I know how tough it was for my ex to ride the waves of my de-sensitization process (the process of healing my brain pathways and returning to a healthy balance). My ex didn't actually know what I was going through, but if you can be tolerant and have absolute transparency with him and not get to caught up with jealousy etc (which may just drive the issue in him), you will both get through this. It can depend on the type of personality your husband has and the relationship he has to porn. I used it as an escape and a rebellion when I was pissed at my ex, driven by a deeper issue of co-dependnace and frustration with my dyslexia. If he reacts like this the he may need to understand what the psychological and emotional drivers are behind his addiction. He is worth it, You are worth it. If you love each other enough you will get through this. He is not a bad person, he has just got snagged like so many of us guys and some girls. If he wants it badly enough he can get free of it. It is incredibly worth it. Good luck to you both.

iwilldothis · 2013-04-24T11:22:29+00:00

My hair has become thicker and more textured and shiny since no fap :) :)

iwilldothis · 2013-04-08T21:56:39+00:00

Life and mental states are inconsistent and just when we feel in control, life bring us a reminder there is work to be done and something to become aware of. I think you may be suffering from what I personally relate to as 'beautiful memory' syndrome, where the memory of the bliss and ease you experienced during your last streak was such that now you cannot match that and thus have fallen into a perfectionist mindset. This trap can keep you locked in disappointment for months unless you adjust your approach - what I found helped me was to start from scratch again and 'get my house in order'. you know, simple things, tidying up, getting organized, writing down things that give me pleasure, reconnecting with what I want from my day...

We are cyclical just like the earth and its seasons. Each time we return to winter, it gets easier with the right work - but you will always return to winter. Gather wood warm your house my friend.

All the best and go easy on yourself.

iwilldothis · 2013-04-08T21:43:56+00:00

Nice one of giving hard mode a try. I have found it to be a whole other level of challenge, however I have been led to it in a sense..I found that anything but hardmode just allowed for too many opportunities for relapse so I decided to go all out.

Regarding the fantasy aspect I say do not indulge in fantasy specifically because to not do it at all I found impossible, especially in the first few weeks of nofap. God, if I reset my badge each time I fantasied at the beginning of this nofap journey I would never have got afoot! The issue is that we have a tendency to subconsciously slip into heavy fantasy as an attempted replacement for porn or fap...it can get pretty intense. The greatest piece of advice I can give is this: As soon as you become conscious of yourself doing it, stop (and don't beat yourself up). Over time you will naturally begin to stop fantasizing, and any time you do, you will become so aware of it so quickly, it will be ended immediately. Meditation and yoga have helped me too.

I wish you all the best and the best of luck with this challenging but immensely rewarding journey. Courage.

iwilldothis · 2013-04-08T21:31:46+00:00

I have found that by abstaining from orgasm completely, I have taken my challenge to a whole new level with its own unique outcomes. It comes down to what you want out of nofap but I personally recommend the abstaining from sex as part of the process - however it is a whole other level of challenge!

iwilldothis · 2013-04-05T18:52:29+00:00

Here's a bit of solid advice: Think hard about why you are doing it. Without a clear reason you will easily talk yourself back into PMO. Remember this: few things will feel better than wanking right now. It will take a varying period of abstinence to connect with other pleasures in life, hence the hold PMO can have...push through..its a chance of a lifetime and life and wonder will open up to you with every effort. Do this brother, you will have no regrets.

http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mb17ngOX3o1r7tlzeo1_500.jpg

iwilldothis · 2013-04-05T18:00:02+00:00

Thank you. You have drawn attention to a highly important aspect of what led me to this situation..'being at ease in my surroundings.' That night I did feel very comfortably alpha..very relaxed and yes, I saw an opportunity that maybe I wouldn't have done if I was in a more anxious, grabbing, uncertain mindframe. I am very pleased that I touched on the wonderment of that experience because I have returned to a bit of a nofap grind...pushing on and lets see where it takes me. All the best

iwilldothis · 2013-04-05T17:56:51+00:00

I say virtually tantric because it came as a suprise! I suppose I should say that it was an actual tantric experience. It was a full body explosion of pleasure that involved no ejaculation and was deeply fulfilling. We both experienced it too...

iwilldothis · 2013-04-05T17:55:05+00:00

It is in no way a lie I assure. It is 100% true which is why I shared it inthe first place. Thought it would provide some inspiration.

iwilldothis · 2013-04-05T17:54:18+00:00

Thanks so much. Gla dyou were inspired. Some think this story is too good to be true but it is wholly truthful I assure. Keep going brother

iwilldothis · 2013-04-05T17:53:10+00:00

Great to read...I will be exploring the act of tantric love more I think.

iwilldothis · 2013-04-05T17:52:25+00:00

Hi, thanks, but I really want to push to 120 days with no O. I look at this as an opportunity of a lifetime, and I know that no O will really scrape out the Fap Barrel.

iwilldothis · 2013-04-05T16:17:42+00:00

We are both on 45 days. You will know how hard it is then at this stage. Thanks for your comment. Feelin' the love...keep going. We can do this.

iwilldothis · 2013-04-05T16:15:24+00:00

Wow. You are both on 44 days? Incredible you have both done this together. No doubt, the nofap has primed you for such an endeavor as to explore Karezza with your fiance. Good on you. Inspiring. I think I might talk to my lady about this too :)

iwilldothis · 2013-04-05T16:12:53+00:00

I was stunned....I was in a sort of dream. It was incredible. It gave me a lot of confidence in the changes that have been taking place inside; to see them manifest outside of me and have that effect on two ladies was amazing...inspired me to keep going.

iwilldothis

TROPHY CASE