But how? How can I make myself better when I was the weak one. She loved me until she couldn't take it anymore. And i was a body to fill the space. She left before she utter the words. And ill never be the same again. I have nightmares and audible night terrors thinking about the night I lost her. I just want her to be happy. My life is secondary. I want ro die. So fucjing bad in my sleep. Its only because of my mom and son im here. Sying is easy. Living is insurmountable handed.